“The Shannara Chronicles” recap (1.07): Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

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Hello, elflings! Now that we know Eretria is officially bisexual and was not just messing with Princess Amberle, I’ll be here every week to give you a little recap of what the ladies were up to. These won’t be full-length recaps, because the Shannara world is very complex, and the season is already more than halfway over. But it won’t hurt to keep tabs on the Princess Rover ship, and have a place where we can all share our feelings!

Previously, Amberle and Eretria have, week after week, gone from threatening each other to saving each other and back again in a way that has built up so much sexual tension it might be more powerful than the elf stones. Last we left our ladies; Amberle and Eretria had taken a bath together, where Eretria came onto Amberle, and Amberle not-so-kindly refused the invitation. Later, Eretria’s “father” told her that “he” (half-elf Wil) would never choose her, and she sighed as though it wasn’t him she would want to be chosen by.

After falling down a big ol’ hill, Amberle wakes up in a river and immediately starts calling for Wil and Eretria. Amberle stumbles along when she hears voices. She peeps through some reeds and sees two people, humans, a woman and a man. Before she can decide what to do, Eretria pops up and claps her hand over the princess’s mouth to keep her quiet.

Shannara 107-1And to keep from kissing her, probably.

Eretria warns Amberle that these humans are elf hunters.

The girls run through the forest, but even as they run, Amberle questions if they should go back to make sure the elf hunters don’t have Wil. Eretria says of course they should, but they should do it under the cover of darkness. And sure enough, arrows start flying in their direction, sending them off running again. Amberle trips and drops her sword because apparently she can only run smoothly when blindfolded and in a gauntlet, but Eretria begs her to leave her sword, and they keep running. Amberle grabs Eretria and rolls them both down a hill, to safety.

The girl elf hunter is hella excited to find the sword because she knows it means the elf they’re hunting is royal. So they stop chasing the girls to gather more troops.

Glad to be free of the elf hunters, Amberle starts counting their blessings, ever the optimist, but before she can start skipping, the ground beneath them gives way, and the two girls fall.

Shannara 107-2Not how I hoped they’d be laying together…

The girls slowly get up and realize that they’re in a high school gymnasium, set up for prom. Well, THEY don’t know that, they only know it’s a building from the Age of Man. Amberle is excited, but Eretria is unimpressed; above them flies a banner that reads, “We Can Be Heroes.” The reverie is broken by bats flying through the newly made hole, and Amberle realizes no matter how cool this place is, they need to get out. She grabs Eretria’s arm while she says it, emboldening the rover, who immediately gets to work to find a way to get them out.

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