“Younger” recap (2.5): Jersey, Sure

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Looks like Liza and Josh are back on (this week). They partake in a little quickie before Liza has to go to work; only, it’s strange timing considering Josh just discovered Liza’s daughter Caitlyn is now following him on Instagram. I guess that IG gets ‘em going. Liza calls Caitlyn on the way to work, asking her to unfollow Josh. Caitlyn complies, but it’s safe to say Liza’s the one having a better morning walk. By the time she gets to Empirical, Kelsey and Diana Trout are in a meeting with Jade to discuss her book cover. She has a really epic idea: spread out in the subway next to a homeless man while masturbating—the cover shot being the moment she climaxes, of course. Now, here I thought this book was supposed to be about fashion trends from a fashion blogger. Seems Jade thinks she’s simply taking over the whole world. Her book will, according to her, also feature a sound clip upon opening the book—her orgasm in action. Trout points out: “Book signing should be fun.”

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Kelsey’s freaking out over Jade’s lack of direction. She wants her pages so she can start publishing this thing—but Jade’s aversions to Kelsey are shining through. Each moment Kelsey becomes more insistent that Jade deliver her some writing, Jade recoils and actually seethes, and literally, maybe foams a little at the mouth as her elevator door closes. They’ve finally agreed to meet at a bar a la Ernest Hemingway, which is the closest Kelsey gets to achieving results. And it’s the closest she’ll ever get.

She shows up at the bar the next night, and Jade’s a no-show. Damn. And Kelsey came all this way to sit in a dive bar drinking whiskey with the so-called writer who doesn’t seem to think her contract is serious. That’s when Lauren texts her with a bombshell: Lauren just blew her book advance on $40,000 boots. Now, she’s feeding everyone around her $600 “douche” burgers and doesn’t show signs of slowing down yet. Her hashtags are evidence of something sinister, too. Is she playing games with Kelsey? #YEP

Meanwhile, Liza goes to one of Josh’s shows and runs into former-married-life-friend, Michelle, donning a “Truffle Butter” shirt. She’s here with her husband because they did a little lurking online—found Liza’s daughter’s Instagram through their daughter’s Instagram and located this radical bluegrass band playing tonight at this “hipster bluegrass bar.” Not only that but they also know by way of their Internet stalking that Liza has a new man, who happens to be the dude in the band.

Unable to hide this one, Liza admits to it, much to the fanfare of Michell,  who looks as if she’s creamed her panties, and her husband who aptly suggests Liza’s picked out some “real estate in Cougar Town.” If there were emojis for Michelle’s reaction to the word “cougar” it would look like this: knife, monkey face with hands over its mouth, and six wines. “Get me a Pinot Grigio,” she orders to her husband.

Josh finishes up with his washboard and comes over to greet Liza’s friends. They joke about being from New Jersey and have no idea Josh has never even been across the river to Jersey. All of that is about to change, though, because they’d love for Liza and Josh to come over for dinner. Dinner in New Jersey with these people? Liza’s mortified.

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