By the good gay gods! It finally feels like summer in Canada now that I’ve watched this year’s Degrassi movie offering, Don’t Look Back. And while I can understand why many of you may believe we Canadians scheduled our travel plans around this event, I was watching with a purpose in mind: lesbian love!
Degrassi delivers yet again. Now don’t get me wrong, this show is cheesier than I ever remember it being (I still long for the days of Paige and Alex), but then again, my Degrassi glory days happened all the way back in high school, so who am I to speak for today’s teens? But lesbians on Canadian television? That I can speak to, and Degrassi‘s Zoe (Ana Golja) and Grace (Nikki Gould) have given me plenty to write about.
At the beginning of the movie, these two don’t really mesh well. As in Grace would rock the hell out of a mesh top, but you wouldn’t ever catch Zoe wearing one.
Also, I would like to take this moment to note that if Tori and Jade from Victorious ever had a baby, it would look just like Grace. Seriously-dead ringer.
These two are in summer school because Zoe failed her science class and Grace wants to bump up her respectable B. After her gay buddy Tristan lets her know he won’t be partnering up with her, Zoe saddles up next to Grace, who reluctantly accepts her offer of being lab partners.
Unsurprisingly, Zoe’s not really getting this science thing, but that’s mostly because she’s not really trying to. So Grace devises a brilliant plan: trans cranial direct current stimulation. Basically it’s a form of electroshock therapy, which I highly advise against. But hey, Zoe gets an A on her next assignment so there must be something to it.
Think again! It’s only been proven as having a placebo effect, meaning Zoe is smarter than she gave herself credit for. Grace says as much, but Zoe’s mad at her for making her look like a fool in front of the class. But Grace wasn’t mocking her: she actually really believes in Zoe and has started to warm up to her, going so far as to invite her on the after school class trip.
The new science teacher, Mr. Bane, leads the trip. You know you’re supposed to feel suspicious about a guy when he shares a name with a Batman villain. Tristan suspects something’s off too, telling Zoe he must have the hots for her. But she doesn’t believe him, and comes up with a plan to prove him wrong.
Oh, boy. You know this won’t end well. Zoe’s plan is to wait until class is over to pull down her bra strap and ask Mr. Bane for advice on evening out her tan.
Thankfully he doesn’t try anything funny. But her actions have gotten her kicked off of participating in any afterschool science club activities. This crushes Zoe, mostly because it means she won’t be able to hang with Grace as much.
The news upsets Grace too, and she offers to help explain the situation to Mr. Bane because:
“I’d never last the summer without you. You’re the only remotely bearable person in that class.”
Such a heartwarming declaration of love.
So they walk into class and when they don’t see gold old teach around, they decide to snoop around his office. There they see a photo of Gloria Chin, who’s gone missing (yeah, I “forgot” to mention that the main storyline of Don’t Look Back is Gloria’s and then Maya’s disappearance).
Obviously they need to get Nancy Drew all up in here, so they break into Mr. Bane’s car. And I’ll stop you right there with your preconceived notions about Grace—it was Zoe who picked the lock.
Anyway, the car is full of photos of missing girls and other creepy stuff. And then as these things go, Mr. Bane starts making his to the car and Zoe and Grace have to hide under a blanket together. And hold hands. For support.
They hold hands the entire drive and when it’s finally over and he leaves the car, they call the cops. But the next day in class an annoyed Mr. Bane lets everyone know the police decided not to pursue the investigation.
Skip to Grace playfully pouncing on Zoe, which in light of everything that has just happened might not have been the smartest move. But she’s just teaching Zoe self defense, as per her request. Naturally this leads to a lot of rolling around on the field. Totally innocent.
Their friendship cemented, they’re even having lunch together outside of school. Gotta love Grace going in for the classic shoulder squeeze and Zoe’s subsequent clueless lovestruck gaze. Then comes along a boy to ruin everything. Miles, who’s crushing on Zoe, tries to tip her off to the fact that Grace likes her. But Zoe is adamant that neither of them likes girls.
Noticing that Zoe’s been acting weird since their lunch date, Grace grills her about it. Zoe reveals Miles’ theory, and Grace jokes that maybe that crush works the other way round. The look on Zoe’s face says there might be something to that.
Cue the subdued freak out. Back at school, Zoe kisses Miles in front of Grace, broadcasting that they’re going on a date and that she has a “hypothesis to test.”
It’s kind of funny that she’ll be testing that hypothesis with someone whose fashion sense is akin to that of Tristan’s. Well the two boys used to have a thing, so that explains a lot. On that note, what the hell Zoe?! Your best friend’s ex? Breaking the code much?
Grace is understandably upset about the ditching. Zoe tries to make it up to her by inviting her to hang with Miles too, and surprisingly Grace accepts. The hangout starts off well, but when Zoe and Miles start macking and then Zoe hints at a threesome, Grace gets pissed.
As in calling Zoe a “user” that nobody likes levels of pissed. In retaliation, Zoe calls her a “lovesick lesbian.” Girls, girls! The words may be tame, but the tone hurts!
Well now they’re not speaking, and with all these girls disappearing, they couldn’t have picked a worse time to be on the outs. Zoe’s worried sick about Grace back at Missing Girls of Degrassi Operational Headquarters. Tristan can tell as much, exclaiming that Zoe must love Grace. For real, even for a teen drama, they sure do throw the L-word around a lot.
It turns out Logan and Gloria concocted the kidnapping plans all along, but now Gloria’s in trouble too. Grace soon shows up safe and sound, ready to team up with Zoe and use their newly acquired science knowledge to solve this crime.
And they do. It was actually pretty easy in the end, but in any case the mayor himself rewards them all with medals for their bravery. Still the question remains: why did Mr. Bane have all those photos of missing girls? Well, he fancies himself a Nancy Drew too. See? Sometimes people are just weird in a totally harmless way.
Then because it’s summer, Zoe takes to the beach to lay out her feelings for Grace. She apologizes for everything, tells Grace she knows she sees and likes the “real” Zoe, and lands a kiss on her.
Zoe tells Grace she doesn’t have to worry about processing things right now (they’re already such good lesbians!). They’ll talk about this more when school starts back in, which is a lot sooner for them than it is for me!
Still, we can’t complain because it was only a short time ago that we thought we lost Degrassi for good. Now Netflix has picked it up and it’s looking like Zoe and Grace are set to return in 2016. So we’ll have to wait and see what the future holds for these two.
