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Famke goes down on “The Farm”

Before I drop this piece of saliva-inducing news, let me be clear that it falls firmly in the rumor category. In fact, only one site in the vast conspiracy of internets mentions this tidbit – and relies on an anonymous source for the info. So why am I telling you? Because I’m testing out the whole “create your own reality” concept – and this is a reality I really want to create: Famke Janssen in The L Word spin-off, The Farm. Six Degrees of Everything reports that Janssen plays an inmate in the 20-minute video that will be presented to Showtime in hopes they’ll develop The Farm:

Although we don’t have a confirmed sighting by one of my sources Famke Janssen was supposed to have been on set [in Vancouver] playing a prisoner being shackled and getting interrogated. The name Famke was confirmed when one of my sources heard “That’s a wrap for Famke” and the presence of Famke Janssen was talked about by a bunch of extras who had run into her in the make-up trailer.
A commenter followed up with news that “we can be sure that Famke is in it” because she was spotted with her dog at the Vancouver airport the week of the shoot. Um, OK.

Not exactly bubbling with credibility, is it? But my fingers definitely are glued in the crossed position until further notice.

In case your brain has been on break like mine has, here’s a brief overview of what we know for sure: The Farm is about a women’s prison for felony offenders and stars Leisha Hailey. She continues her role as Alice Pieszecki, who now is incarcerated for reasons unknown, but probably related to what and who goes down in the final season of The L Word. (I said “goes down.” Heh-heh.) “The Farm” refers to a section of California’s Humboldt State Farm and Prison for Women, sort of like Emerald City was in Oz or the G-Wing is in Bad Girls. The other wing featured in the series is called “The Jungle.” So far, this is the one and only picture we have of the set. According to Six, Alice initially is assigned to The Jungle. However, another inmate assigned to The Farm wants to “be with her home girls” in The Jungle, so she and Alice trade places. And nobody notices? OK, Ilene. Whatever.

Word is that Jackie Laurie Metcalf plays the ruthless and ambitious warden, Dr. Margaret Elder, who greets the busload of inmates as they arrive at their new home. I’d love to see Metcalf chew the scenery in a tough-broad role like this. Melissa Leo, aka Helena Peabody’s ex, plays correctional officer Helen Miller. Leo is listed in the cast for The Farm on IMDb, so this rumor actually has a bit of substance behind it. I hope we get to see the rest of that tattoo. Although I remain skeptical about this project, I have to admit that I like these casting rumors. I like them a lot. And for now, I’m adopting a daily practice of visualizing Famke Janssen as a lesbian prisoner. It’s the least I can do for the world.

Assuming the reports are correct, what do you think about The Farm cast so far? Who else would you like to see in prison with Alice? Is anyone else hoping Peggy Peabody will stop by for a visit?

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