Previously on Chasing Life, Brenna got super grounded for almost getting arrested while trying to break into Greer’s house to see her and for getting drunk with Natalie, April is juggling a post-coma Leo and a grumpyfaced Dom, and George told Sara he didn’t want to be her dirty little secret anymore.
We begin in The Charles (the bar/coffee shop/sandwich shop, not the river) where April and Natalie are having beers together like normal humans and not secret half-sisters who just met. Natalie admits that she’s bummed to go back to Florida; she claims it’s because of the hot guys in Boston, but I have a feeling it goes a little deeper than that. The bartender comes over and flirts with the girls, and Natalie flirts back by being outright mean to him. Some guys are into that, apparently. April says she’s tired and wants to go home, but Natalie wants to go out with a bang, literally, so she takes both free shots the bartender hands them and decides to stay.
Doctor Uncle George visits the Carver residence and is about to have a serious conversation about their relationship when Brenna and Grandma come bopping in, chatting giddily about the Saw franchise. Girls after my own heart. April says she’s in for movie night, but only until George starts pointing out the medical impossibilities. George says they don’t have to worry about him complaining because he got an offer for a new job, so he can’t stay. April asks if he’ll still be able to consult with Dr. Hamburg, and George says they can videochat; when this raises a lot of Carver eyebrows, he says that the job is in San Francisco, and that he leaves at the end of the week.
Sara tells George she’s sad that he’s leaving and hopes it isn’t because of her; she says that if he stays, they can make a real go of it, tell the girls about their relationship, the whole shebang. He thinks this is just a knee-jerk reaction to his news and that she should really think about it before saying that this is what she really wants; he wants her to be sure.
When April tells Beth the news, Beth wonders aloud how she manages to keep reeling family members in just to scare them away again. While they’re bantering their perfect banter, Beth’s roommate walks out while she’s on the phone, still loud, still annoying, still a total pushover for her asshole boyfriend. When she gets off the phone, Roomie of the Year tells Beth that she’s moving out at the end of the week and to not feel bad that she’s been dating Graham for less time but he doesn’t love her enough to force her to move in with him. Beth looks at her in shock and says she’s perfectly secure in her relationship status thank you but less thrilled with the prospect of having to find a roommate with a week’s notice. Her roommate shrugs and says she has a friend that’s being evicted that Beth can talk to.
At work, April finds out that her latest cancer article got the most hits and Bossman actually pays her compliments. He announces some changes for the paper, including a new column called Lifestyle, and encourages people to work together for content. For example, there’s a cancer benefit concert, and April and Dom are assigned to work it.
April tries to tell Dom that things don’t have to be awkward while they work together but he just growls in her general direction like the mature adult he is. There’s an expression for this, for why you shouldn’t date coworkers, but it includes language not acceptable for a recap of a show on ABC Family. I’ll let you use your imagination on that one.
When April comes home, she finds Brenna and Natalie chatting on the couch like old friends, and Brenna breaks the news: Their Secret Sister is staying.
Natalie says she decided not to set an alarm and let fate decide whether or not she should go back to Florida, and fate (plus also probably the late-night partying) made her miss her flight. She says she’s going to stay with Teeg the Bartender and work at The Charles until she gets her footing. April does not do a great job at pretending to be excited, but Brenna is pretty amused by the whole situation.
At dinner, Brenna suggests throwing some sort of mini going away gathering for Doctor Uncle George, and everyone thinks it’s a great idea, because they could use some normalcy in their lives. When the girls leave, Sara tries to convince herself via her mother that not telling the girls was the right decision after all, because the last thing they need is another wrench in their lives. Emma sort of agrees; this year has brought a lot of changes. Cancer, lesbianism, secret sisters, boyfriends in comas, run-ins with the law-could they handle another bombshell? Even a potentially exciting one? The Carver matriarchs aren’t sure.
April goes to visit Leo in his apartment, and Leo surprises April (and me) by suggesting they go on a real date, since they started off hot and heavy (and in a funeral home) and he wants to start over. April says she has to work tonight, but is vague about it, and they make plans for the next evening after George’s party.
The benefit turns out to be one awkward situation after another. First, April and Dom run into a mutual friend who, for someone who seems like another journalist/reporter type, is extremely behind on his current events. He thinks April’s haircut was inspired by Les Mis, and assumes the two of them are still sleeping together. After he leaves, April and Dom make a plan of attack; Dom has the connections to get the musicians for an interview, and April has the cancer to get the coordinator for an interview. Dom tries to make a joke about her cancer, but ends up just sounding bitter and cruel.
The coordinator, Monica, tells the duo that she picked bands for the event that specialize in love songs, because she believes that cancer survivors make the best partners for each other (kind of the opposite of addicts). This fuels Dom’s bitter fire and he ends up throwing barbs at April during the entire interview. She tries to ignore them and be professional, only addressing his comments when Monica inquires about them, but the whole thing is hella uncomfortable.
Later that night, when April goes to pick up dinner at The Charles, she finds Natalie on her first shift. She tells April that Teeg is kind of clingy and now that she’s crashing at his place she feels obligated to sleep with him. April says that’s no way to live and you can see the wheels turning under that adorable fluff of hair.
Brenna and Sara are walking through town and Brenna offers to help cook dinner as an apology for all the mayhem she has been causing lately; for almost getting kicked out of school with Greer, for almost getting arrested for Greer, for getting drunk to forget Greer… At the mention of the bubbly blonde, Sara asks if Brenna has talked to her lately. Brenna says that though she had been hoping Greer would reach out, she hasn’t heard from her since the night of the romantic gesture fail. Sara asks if Brenna is worried about school starting, and Brenna admits that she’s dreading it. How are you supposed to get over someone when you have to see them every day?
Sara uses this as a segue to talk about herself; she is starting to get over Brenna’s dad, so how would Brenna feel about Sara dating someone new? Brenna is sort of whatever about it but then is distracted by the idea that they should just have the dinner catered instead, because it’s Uncle George, and there’s nothing stressful about him. Right, Mom? Right??
Leo calls April in a tizzy because his parents hired him a nurse named Pete who is cramping his style. April promises they’ll figure it out when she comes over, and hangs up to get a face full of grump from Dom. Dom finally lets out what his thin veil of bitter retorts had been almost holding back and says he’s still really upset about the breakup, about the way things went, about still having to see her all the time. What’s worse, she doesn’t seem that upset at all. “When a heart breaks, no, it don’t break even.”
They get called into the Bossman’s office and get a little talking to about the awkward tension Monica reported back, but they promise whatever was going on between them is super over and that they’ll sort out their baggage and stop letting it interfere with their work. Dom says he’ll send over her revisions, and April says she’ll be sure to turn it around right away.
April later confesses to Beth that she wanted to tell Dom that she did hurt too, but she couldn’t bring herself to say it. Beth encourages April not to tell any of this to Leo, but April doesn’t want to live a life of secrets anymore, she just wants the truth, always. Beth says she’ll soon be getting the truth always because she met her potential new roommate and she has chronic verbal diarrhea, an inability to stand still, and has already sent over a chore chart. April tells Beth not to call her yet to confirm that she has the apartment, because she has someone Beth should meet first.
At George’s going away dinner, Sara gets hit on by the caterer, and her daughters notice and encourage it. Grandma Emma tries to subtly get the idea out of their heads, and by subtly, I mean she says he’s probably on drugs because he forgot to bring one of his pans. (Side note: Is his a new kind of catering? Hire a personal home chef for the day? Because it seems weird to me to have a strange man in your home cooking for a family of five.)
The girls try to get George on their side, oblivious to his heartache, and he distracts them by giving a toast, telling them how much he’ll miss his family, but that he won’t let the distance come between them.
Brenna asks George what he thinks of Sara and the chef, and George tries not to vomit in his mouth and says he’s glad Brenna looks out for her mom’s happiness like that and makes her promise to keep doing it when he’s gone.
Across town, Beth gets a knock on her door and Natalie strolls in with her suitcase. Beth tells her that April gave her the lowdown on her previous situation and promises Natalie doesn’t have to sleep with her to stay in her apartment. Natalie gives Beth a smirk and says, literally, “Well then, nevermind.”
Beth tells Natalie she can pay month to month, which is exactly how Natalie likes to live. Beth says she’s on her way out to The Charles, and Natalie says they might run into each other while she’s trying to shake Teeg the Bartender off.
At the Carver house, George and April say their goodbyes, then George asks Sara to walk him out. Sara tells George that she changed her mind, that maybe what they have is too complicated, and maybe they both need sometimes simple for now. They kiss goodbye and George walks off into the sunset.
After dinner, April goes over Leo’s and says that she convinced Pete to let her take over Leo’s schedule for the night. Nine pm was bathtime, so she strips down into her underwear and gets into the pool. Leo struggles to follow suit and ends up falling in. They splash around all cute like they haven’t a care in the world.
Before things get too fun, April makes a few confessions to Leo: She had a work assignment with Dom, it’s still hard being around him, and though she knows it would be easier to date Dom, she’d rather be here with Leo. Leo says what they have will never be normal, but April says abnormal is just the way she likes it.
Later that night, she gets the article from Dom, called, “A Lovesick Lullaby,” and April has no idea what to make of it.
Dom and Graham head to The Charles to meet Beth, who is running late. They sit at the bar next to a sexy Latina, and lo and behold, it’s Secret Sister Natalie. She pulls out all the stops to flirt with Dom, and then uses him to shake her clingy bartender. Dom plays along, coyly pulling her close to him until the bartender seems sufficiently fooled. They flirt a little more, and when it becomes clear they are both single, they start making out, much to Graham’s dismay.
Right then, Beth walks in and sees them kissing and looks like the floor just dropped out from underneath her.
This cannot possibly end well for anyone involved.
What did you think of “Cancer Friends with Benefits”?
Here are some of our favorite #ChasingLesbians tweets from this week.
Typical that Dominic won’t stop whining on #ChasingLife, course the pretty white guy makes someone’s cancer All. About. Him #ChasingLesbians
– Ange (@AngeloYellow) February 3, 2015
“@ChasingLifeABCF: Get ready!” For what?! What’s going to happen?! What are you going to make me feel?! #ChasingLife #ChasingLesbians
– anh62950 (@anh62950) February 3, 2015
I would totally run after Beth like that. #ChasingLife #ChasingLesbians
– Kitty (@SmartLittleLiar) February 3, 2015
Let it go. Let it go. Let it go. Let it goooooo! #ChasingLesbians #ChasingLife
– Terri (@TLM327) February 3, 2015
I want them to adopt me. @aishadee @halesbells #ChasingLesbians #ChasingLife #wifelife pic.twitter.com/JD8mpKdqkm
– Audrey (@pamplemoussee76) February 3, 2015
No Brenna don’t mvoe on, moving on sucks don’t you do it. #chasinglife #chasinglifechat #grenna #chasinglesbians
– K. Lewis (@TechLewis) February 3, 2015
“Cancer, lesbianism” Grandma is too damn funny #ChasingLesbians #ChasingLife
– maraleia (@maraleia) February 3, 2015
“Surprise, bitches!” is one of my favorite phrases which probably says a lot about me. #ChasingLife #ChasingLesbians
– Nic (@njnic23) February 3, 2015
Sara Carver’s hair is in pigtails. I JUST DIED OF CUTE! #ChasingLesbians #ChasingLife
– Syd (@SydB29) February 3, 2015
And don’t worry, Joni Lefkowitz promised me Greer will be back next week!
