“The Fall” Recap (2.3): Get on the elevator, you idiot


The detectives go to visit Katie. I know, you’re thinking, “This is it. They’re about to get him. Hallelujah.” But, alas, you did not factor in the variable associated with anything to do with the teenage brain.

Katie comes down and tells them that she babysat that night. But then Paul came home at 9:30 p.m. and then they talked until 3 am So she gives him an alibi and we’re left screaming, “FUCKING TEENAGERS” at our screens.

Eastwood informs Stella that Dr. Reed Smith visited Rose Stagg’s husband the other night. And then says they seemed “comfortable” with each other. Is that supposed to mean they’re having an affair? An almost imperceptible wave of surprise and disappointment washed over Stella’s face at this news. Not the lovely Reed Smith, not her lovely Reed Smith.


Teenage Mutant Cliché Katie calls Paul while he’s shopping for new clothes at a thrift store. She tells him the police came around and if he wants to know what she told them he’d better meet her. Blackmailing a serial killer for a date. Wow, I realize all teenagers are inherently idiots, but this is some sort of championship level stupidity.

The detectives return and tell Stella the bad news about Katie’s ridiculous alibi. Stella voices the entire audience’s bemusement when she replied, “What the fuck is she playing at?” What indeed. At least she unwittingly gave them one good piece of information. The night before that Paul and his wife were in the same bar as Annie Brawley. 


The police hold a press conference to implore the public for help on the Rose Stagg case. Rose’s husband is there, and cries as he should. The cameras click at the tears. Stella, who is watching with the team from the office, slinks off during home video images of Rose. Someone is feeling guilty.

Later that evening she arrives at the scene of Paul’s phone call to her. Searchers find tire tracks that match Rose’s car and her cellphone case, but not the phone. A car comes up the road to the overlook, and stops short. Oh, you knew it was Paul. He sees the police, and Stella, and backs up quickly with his lights out muttering, “Fuck you, Stella. Fuck you. Fucking bitch.” Aw, isn’t misogyny just the cutest?


Luckily, Stella has noticed and jots down the license plate number. The cop who was previously guarding Annie’s hospital room is now tasked with chasing down the car, but it’s gone. She does track down a stolen plate though, with the proper modifications, matches the one that sped off. Meanwhile, Stella gets a call from Reed Smith, who wants to see her that night. I know, I know. I’m excited too. Let’s steady our nerves and get through the rest of this stuff. 


Unfortunately, the rest of this stuff involves Teenage Mutant Cliché Katie and Paul. She is meeting him at a restaurant, over a glass of wine. I had to physically restrain myself to stop from throwing things at my television during their entire conversation. 

You see, Katie isn’t trying to fuck with Paul or expose Paul. Katie genuinely wants a relationship with Paul and is actively trying to gain his approval. She tells him about her alibi and even asks if he is pleased with her. Never before have I wanted to reach through a TV screen and shake someone as much as Katie. And that’s including all six seasons of The L Word.


She demands the truth about Paul, and he tells her some story about finding a victim’s wallet and seeing Stella on TV and being angry that this hot, smart, self-assured British lady was making the sad sack Irishman look like a potato so then decided to fuck with the investigation. You know, to show that English bitch a lesson. 

Hey, Katie, here’s a tip from me to you–if a guy you want to date talks about punishing a woman for making a man look bad, instead of helping that woman catch someone who is killing other women, he is not a guy you want to date. Or be near. Or give an alibi for murder. And definitely don’t tell him you’ll do anything he asks. I mean, that’s just, like, the rules of feminism. 


Well, at least Paul calls Katie out on being a stereotypical rebellious teenager in the process. He is testing her, clearly. She passes enough for him to give her a mobile phone and tells her to create a fake email account and use it for a video chat account. I don’t know how this is all going to tie in, but I know it’s going to be bad.

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