TV

Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever. (May 23, 2008)

MUY CALIENTE! (THAT’S SPANISH FOR HOT LESBIAN KISS ON GREY’S ANATOMY) American broadcast TV finally has a leading lesbian/bi women (and probably two)! And on one of America’s highest rated shows! It’s a lesbian Christmas miracle (in May)!

On last night’s two-hour season finale of Grey’s Anatomy, Dr. Callie Torres (Sara Ramirez) finally kissed Dr. Erica Hahn (Brooke Smith). And Hahn kissed back.

The tension has been building between Hahn and Torres for the two episodes leading up to the finale, beginning with Addison (Kate Walsh) asking Callie if the two women were lovers. In last week’s episode, Hahn kissed Torres to taunt resident playboy Mark Sloane (Eric Dane), but he wasn’t the only one turned on, as a stunned Torres stumbled her way out of the elevator.

In the finale, Sloane, while having sex with Callie, describes an erotic fantasy involving Callie and Erica, and Callie quickly stops him. Later, when he sees Callie watching Erica intently while she’s performing a surgery, Sloane busts Callie on her obvious feelings for Erica, telling her: “It’s OK. I wish I was all someone thought about all day.”

When they’re leaving that night, Callie tries to entice Sloane to “finish what they started,” but he tells her to finish what she started, and nods to Hahn. So Callie does, trying at first to tell Erica how she feels with words, and then finally just grabbing her and kissing her for a several seconds. They break apart for a moment to look at each other, then start kissing again. (Thanks to Samantha for the screencaps!)

And with that, Callie became only the second bisexual Latina character on American broadcast television (the first was Anna on One Tree Hill).

Here’s what the Grey‘s writers said about what to expect for next season:

Callie and Erica. Callie and Erica!! My god, did we discuss this a lot around here. Because Callie kisses a girl. We had this really cool meeting with GLAAD where we talked about the idea that a woman could decide she had feelings for another woman after being perfectly happy with men and we all got joyous because the chemistry between Callie and Erica and Mark is hot and interesting and fresh and like nothing any of us had seen on TV before. And we wanted it to be real – not some stunt to get people talking. We wanted to see what would happen if a woman suddenly had feelings for another woman. Because that has got to be surprising. And it is for Callie who so likes men. Who so likes sleeping with men.

You’ll be very surprised when you find out where this story is heading next season. Because we don’t do things the easy way. And none of this will be easy. Not for Callie. Not for Erica. And not for Mark Sloan …

Hmm. I like my TV dramas complicated, but I hope they understand that the most surprising development would be if the two women actually just had a romantic relationship – one with the usual ups and downs, but where neither one died, became a killer, decided they were straight, got raped, fired or became encased in cement. Because that just doesn’t happen on broadcast TV.

Earlier this week, Smith told USA Today: “Seeing [my character] have a relationship with anyone is a good thing – and with Callie would be great. It’s 2008 – time for all sorts of diversity. We have a woman and an African American running for president. Good for us!”

And Smith told Entertainment Tonight last night: “[Ramirez is] a great kisser … a very attractive woman. Who wouldn’t want to kiss her?” Smith has played a lesbian character before (in a play with her Grey’s adversary Sandra Oh years ago).

Ramirez created a Spanish-language PSA for GLAAD, which you can watch here: I only understood the words “gay, lesbian, and bisexual” – but Sara could be selling gay Amway products in this video and I’d watch it.

For those of you picky readers who don’t speak Spanish and want to know what she’s actually saying, it’s: “Hi, I’m Sara Ramirez. Discrimination and intolerance affects our families. What happens when that discrimination is against a brother, sister, niece, mother or uncle that is gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender … would you accept it? For a more inclusive world, say no to stereotypes and discrimination. For more information please visit the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation: glaad.org.”

How do you say, “Sara is awesome I can’t wait for the new season please Shonda don’t mess this up!” in Spanish? Discuss this and other pressing Callie/Erica topics in the Callie/Erica forum thread. You can also watch the episode in full at ABC.com.

P.S. Did anyone else notice there was a commercial during the Grey‘s finale starring Ellen DeGeneres, and a different one starring Cynthia Nixon? If only ABC had thrown in Leisha Hailey‘s Yoplait commercial, it would have been an out-lesbians-in-commercials trifecta!

by Sarah Warn

HOW DO YOU SAY BOMB IN RUSSIAN? You know when something sounds good on paper, but then turns out to be a big mess in real life? Yeah, this is not one of those times. This is one of those times when something sounded bad on paper and turned out to be an even bigger mess in real life.

Because how could a film about a faux-lesbian pop duo and the two teenage girls, one American and one Russian, who come together over their love for the group and then get swept into the dangerous world of drugs, obsession, murder and lesbian kisses ever sound good on paper? Turns out it looks even worse on screen. The film formerly known as Finding t.A.T.u. and now blandly transformed into You and I screened at the Cannes Film Festival last week. Its star, Mischa Barton was MIA at the premiere. I think you’ll understand why after watching the trailer. (Beware: Mature language and tons of “moose and squirrel” accents ahead.) Wow. That was just awful. And the craziest part is that “two-time Academy Award nominee” Roland JoffĂ© really directed it. The man gave us The Killing Fields and The Mission. How badly does he need cash?

Speaking of which, how badly does Mischa need a career counselor? I mean, at least she had the good sense to be too embarrassed by the film to show up. But, Mischa darling, I think we have to apply the Pottery Barn rule here: You break it, you buy it. Or – more accurately – you cash the paycheck, you smile at the premiere.

The real (using that term relatively) t.A.T.u. girls, Yulia Volkova and Lena Katina, apparently felt no such shame, since they did appear at Cannes and told the press that the film was not Sapphically inclined. According to BBC News reports, they said: “Is not lesbian film. Is love film.” Right, since lesbians can’t be in love. Well, at least faux lesbians can’t.

P.S. Why is one of them orange? Interestingly, the trailer repeatedly identifies Mischa’s character, Lana, and Shantel VanSanten’s character, Janie, as just “best friends.” This downplaying of the film’s lesbian content makes no sense because as cheap and exploitative as it is, it is also the only thing that might have put (teenage boy) butts in the seats.

Well, at least I think we can all agree they’re definitely “Not Gonna Get Us” to see this movie.

JOSS AND CHLOE SITTING IN A TREE, B-I-N-G-O-I-N-G In more lesbian movie news, pictures have surfaced of Joss Stone‘s “long lingering French kiss” in her new indie film Snappers. Joss will play a lesbian bingo-caller who meets an actress (Chloe Howman) hiding from the paparazzi in a local caravan park.

The film is now in post-production and is scheduled to be released on Sept. 24. The snaps of Joss and Chloe Howman‘s lesbian lip lock, as the tabloids love to say, are the only stills from the British film to appear so far. Hmm, interesting. Do you think … ? Could it be … ? Nah, they’d never exploit the film’s lesbian content to drum up interest in what otherwise sounds like a rather silly movie, would they? Apparently, they reward bingo winners very differently in England.

by Dorothy Snarker

HINT TO PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES: SUPPORT US, AND WE’LL VOTE FOR YOU Yesterday on the Ellen DeGeneres Show, just a week after Ellen DeGeneres announced that she and Portia de Rossi plan to get married later this year now that same-sex marriage is legal in California, she sat down with Republican presidential candidate John McCain and asked him why he didn’t support same-sex marriage. Looking visibly uncomfortable, McCain told her, “I just believe in the unique status of marriage between and man and a woman, and I know that we have a respectful disagreement on that issue.”

“Respectful”? In what way is homophobia respectful?

Though she didn’t used the word discrimination, Ellen then schooled him in voting rights, reminding him that women and blacks weren’t always given the right to vote, either. “We are all the same people, all of us,” Ellen said. “You’re no different than I am. Our love is the same. When someone says, ‘You can have a contract, and you’ll still have insurance, and you’ll get all that,’ it sounds to me like saying, ‘Well, you can sit there, you just can’t sit there.'” McCain, you see, supports the rights of same-sex couples to enter into “legal agreements” so they can have insurance and stuff (woohoo! come to my reception to celebrate getting insurance!), but he doesn’t support them in getting married. He did tell Ellen that he wishes her “every happiness,” to which she responded, “So, you’ll walk me down the aisle?”

Everybody laughed then, because the chance of McCain escorting Ellen to her nuptials is about as likely as the Democratic nominee for president being decided by the time you read this.

But let’s not forget that neither Barack Obama nor Hillary Clinton – both of whom have plenty of experience with discrimination – support same-sex marriage, either. I know, I know, we can’t expect our presidential candidates to champion equality or fight bigotry. That’s what Ellen’s for. WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA? Back in February, Rosie O’Donnell and Fran Drescher announced that they were planning to work together on a television sitcom. More news on that sitcom surfaced this week in New York Newsday‘s excellently titled piece, “Rosie O’Donnell, Fran Drescher combine for TV’s whiniest sitcom?

The sitcom, tentatively titled The New Thirty, will be about high school friends living in the same Manhattan apartment building who are on the verge of midlife crises. Drescher told In Touch Weekly: “It’s kind of Sex and the City but we ain’t getting any. It’ll probably be more like The Odd Couple. I’ll be Oscar and [Rosie will] be Felix.” Wow. It’s No Sex and the City. Sounds like just about every other network TV show with a lesbian on it!

CYNTHIA NIXON’S LESBIAN LOVER IS NOT A MAN! AND OTHER SHOCKING REVELATIONS Last Sunday, as I was reading the New York Times while munching on an everything bagel with lox spread, I was surprised and delighted to find a Q&A with out actor Cynthia Nixon in the New York Times Magazine, as part of her high-heeled, well-coiffed Sex and the City publicity blitz.

But I soon discovered that the interviewer, Deborah Solomon, apparently has never met any lesbians before Cynthia Nixon, nor has she done any research (you know, like what a journalist at the New York Times should do) about lesbians – at least that’s what the tenor of her questions suggested. After Solomon asked Nixon whether it was easier to live with a woman than a man “because you have more in common” and commenting that the two could use the same bathroom at the movie theater (duh!), she asked the following:

Can you share clothes? No. Christine doesn’t wear women’s clothes; she only wears men’s clothes. She won’t even wear any kind of women’s shoes. I bought her a pair of cowboy boots that were from the women’s department, and she was like, “Don’t do this again.”

Does she watch sports on TV? She does. We don’t have a TV. But when there was a World Cup, we went to the local Ruby Foo’s and watched it. And we actually did watch the Super Bowl as well. She tried to explain it to me.

Do you think of her as the male figure in the relationship? No, I don’t at all. Look at what’s happening now. She’s at home with the kids, and I’m the one out pounding the pavement. … She’s for Hillary, and I’m for Obama.

The armload of misinformed assumptions and outdated stereotypes in these few lines boggles my mind. I mean, this is the New York Times, right? The GLAAD Award-winning newspaper that often publishes well-balanced articles about gay marriage, gay rights, etc.? Quick! Somebody help! The nation’s most “liberal” newspaper has been hijacked and sent back to 1976!

Reading this article made me wonder what other publications might ask Nixon while she’s on her Sex and the City press tour, especially since when she came out a few years ago, she wouldn’t say much about her relationship with Christine Marinoni. But Nixon’s now willing to talk about it, which is both good and bad. Take her interview with the U.K.’s Times, in which Nixon responds to a question apparently along the lines of “Is your ideal man a woman?” and/or “Would you love your girlfriend if she were a man?” Here’s an excerpt:

“I have to say that in terms of the particular person I’m with I guess I do feel that the ideal man is a woman,” laughs Nixon. “I feel like she’s much more intuitive about what’s going on with me. She’s much more willing to treat it like a partnership. We eat together, shop and cook together, raise children together. And there’s much more sense of the task at hand and we both fit in. I’m in love with her because she’s her; it’s hard to know if I’d be in love with her if she were a man. If she were a man, would she be differ-ent? Would she still be this intuitive? Would she still be this devoted?
This article (and this quote) led to the following headline on the admittedly tawdry FemaleFirst.co.uk: “Cynthia Nixon’s lady-boy.” (Cue collective groan.)

But while a lot of the media coverage on Cynthia Nixon focuses salaciously on her “lesbian lover,” it’s also bizarrely balanced out by the enthusiastic assumption, in the wake of last week’s legalization of same-sex marriage in California, that she and Marinoni are going to get married. Nixon inadvertently fanned the flames of matrimonial speculation with her recent interview with the Telegraph:

“I’ve always been wary of marriage,” she says. “I felt it was a potential trap because some people want the party and the gifts and the public celebration – rather than the commitment. But, if it becomes legal, we might. My girlfriend is interested, whereas my boyfriend never was. I also think that for us to get married would be a little act of rebellion. It’s like getting the vote – you’d do it because you’ve never been allowed to before.”
But this week on the Graham Norton Show, she quashed the rumors by saying: “It’s untrue. ‘Cause we can’t get married. (But) we could get married for pretend! We live in New York; New York has no same sex marriage. I think one day soon, hopefully, it may (be legal), and then I think we’ll consider it.”

That was an incredibly even-keeled and rational response, Cynthia! How will the tabloids spin that one? How about this: Cynthia Nixon to stage “pretend” wedding with lesbian lover!

Is there a lesson to be learned from all this? Well, as I passed that time-warp New York Times interview over to my lesbian lover girlfriend, she read it and commented: “Right on with not wearing women’s shoes! They’re totally uncomfortable, anyway.”

Take that, Manolo Blahnik.

– by Malinda Lo

SPEAKING IN TONGUES: THE INTERNATIONAL LANGUAGE OF TV LESBIAN LOVE American television is experiencing a lesbian bed death of sorts – yeah, so, what else is new? With The L Word in the home stretch, ABC’s series Cashmere Mafia officially whacked, Spashley shoved into their locker until fall, and Season 2 of Logo’s Exes & Ohs not scheduled to debut until early 2009, it’s going to be a long, uh, dry summer.

While some of us are surviving on Callie and Hahn crumbs or are resigned to watching Nip/Tuck just to get an eyeful of Katee Sackhoff, international viewers are enjoying lesbionic story lines all over the place. Thanks to tips from readers Maverick, Breakerfall, Kathrine and Marx, here’s a sample of fictional lesbians from around the world.

SPANISH TV: LOS HOMBRES DE PACO This police dramedy features a slow-boil plotline between cop Pepa Miranda, played by Spanish model Laura Sanchez, and forensics expert Silvia Castro, played by acting veteran Marian Aguilera. Due to incredibly confusing family relationships, Silvia is also Pepa’s brother’s sister-in-law. Or brother’s father-in-law’s daughter. Or something. It’s complicated but not incestuous. I don’t think.

Anyway, in a recent episode, Pepa and Silvia attended a party, but it wasn’t until afterward that the real festivities began, when Silvia helped Pepa remover her lipstick. With her own lips. I know precious few words in Spanish, but caliente is definitely one of them. Read more about in Pepa and Silvia in the AfterEllen.com forum thread here.

AUSTRALIA: ALL SAINTS Now in its 11th season, All Saints is Australia’s answer to ER, with the familiar humongous cast, weekly medical mysteries, intra-hospital relationship drama and hot doctors holding clipboards.

In the recent episode”That Window in Time,” nurse Rhiannon diagnosed herself and determined she suffers from chronic Lesbianism. She promptly reported her findings to the hospital’s competent and complex lesbian physician, Dr. Charlotte Beaumont. Watch for a snippet of the scene around 1:40 in this video recap of the episode.

All Saints fans already know actors Tammy MacIntosh (Dr. Beaumont) and Petra Jared (Rhiannon), but here they are for the rest of us: Sci-fi fans may remember MacIntosh as Farscape‘s Jool, the surly teenage alien with the scream that melts metal, mood-ring hair, and abs for days. Hopefully, viewers from down under will have more luck with Dr. Beaumont than we did with Dr. Kerry Weaver.

CHILE: EL SEĂ‘OR DE LA QUERENCIA Meanwhile, in South America, Chilean broadcaster TVN is breaking new ground by airing the soap opera El Señor de la Querencia, which features lesbian characters in prime-time. Not only is it a first for Chile, but the two characters figure prominently in the series’ story arc, set in the 1920s, and do not appear to be part of a cheap ratings-grab stunt.

What? That really happens?

Lucrecia Santa Maria is a wealthy yet rebellious young butch played by Lorena Bosh, who enjoys smoking, drinking and a well-tailored tuxedo. Much to her conservative mother’s dismay, Lucrecia also enjoys blowing off arranged marriages, driving cars, and a prostitute named Herminia, played by Begoña Basauri. So far, Lucrecia and Herminia have had on-screen kisses for which Herminia didn’t even charge anything, so you know her feelings toward the rakish rebel are genuine. Luckily for Chilean audiences, actors Basauri and Bosh have both said in interviews that their characters’ relationship will continue to evolve.

FRANCE: PLUS BELLE LA VIE AE reader “Kathrine du Danemark” sent us a tip about a lesbian story line in a French romantic dramedy called Plus belle la vie. Its IMDb.com keywords include Extramarital Affair, Blackmail, Death, Adultery, Love, Secret Relationship and Gay Romance. What’s not to love?

France 3’s lesbionic contribution to broadcasting consists of blond beauty Rebecca Hampton playing CĂ©line FrĂ©mont, a tragedy-prone executive, and smoldering Virginie Pauc taking on the role of newcomer Virginie Mirbeau. CĂ©line and Virginie are attracted to each other, but their relationship is complicated. Quelle surprise. If it’s a French show with kissing, that makes it French kissing, right? I can’t find a translated version of this episode, but who needs words when we all speak the international language of lesbian love?

by Dara Nai

ANGELINA JOLIE GREETS A WOMAN, AND OTHER REASONS SHE MUST BE GAY Anyone Angelina Jolie kisses turns to gold for the paparazzi. Her brother even had his 15 minutes for their infamous lip lock at the Oscars.

This week at the Cannes Film Festival, Clint Eastwood‘s wife, Dina, was on the receiving end of Jolie’s lips, and the press once again was able to utilize the word lesbian alongside her name in headlines. (It really should be legal for us to copyright the term and get paid for every misuse.) However, it is kind of suspicious that Jolie would do the smooch right in front of a line of cameras. I suppose if you’re feeling it, though, you’re feeling it – even if you’re pregnant with twins and your husband is on your arm.

EROTICA IS FINE, BUT LESBIANS ARE JUST A LITTLE TOO MUCH Perhaps we should take this as a compliment: There’s been a lot of controversy over a new lesbian erotica collection being called “too racy” simply because it’s about lesbians. The collection’s editor, Zane (yes, one name, like Cher) is a best-selling erotica author who has published several books about sex, but Purple Panties: The Eroticanoir.com Anthology is the first to cause such a stir within national chain bookstores, who complain about the cover, which features two purple panties-wearing women in an embrace. Zane (a straight woman who refers to herself as an “honorary lesbian”) wrote a response that was published on the African American Literature Book Club website:

The only difference between Purple Panties and the nearly two-dozen other titles that I have written or edited is that it is a collection of LESBIAN EROTICA. To that, I say shame on it all. It saddens me that we still live in a world that is so sexually oppressed. Now I am not saying that people need to rush out and read the book, or any of my books.

I am saying, point blank, that people have a ton of sexual hang-ups that they need to get over.

Everything is not for everybody but to “be offended,” to claim that a book is “too racy” for book signings but Succulent was not too racy a couple of months ago, nor Dear G Spot before that, or the book before that and so on, makes the real rationale behind it obvious.

Right on Zane – there is certainly some homophobia at work here, but here’s hoping that this “bad publicity” works in favor for the book as well as its upcoming sequel, Missionary No More: Purple Panties 2.

As Zane concluded in her response letter to the public: “Do not think that, for one second, this will deter me from my path. People love as they love; not as directed.” Anyone feel like starting a controversial erotica book club?

U-HAUL SHOULD REALLY GET IN ON THIS It’s been proven that lesbians love to drive Subarus, whether it’s a direct reflection of the car company’s gay friendly ad campaigns (“It’s Not a Choice. It’s the Way We’re Built”) or perhaps the brand’s outdoorsy appeal. (Maybe it’s even the roomy backseats.) Whatever the reason you and yours might own a Subaru, Logo (AfterEllen.com’s parent company) wants to know about it: The network is working with Subaru for a new Real Momentum series of “short portrait documentaries” featuring gays and lesbians with their Subaru vehicles. Interested parties of “any location, age, gender or race” can e-mail [email protected], but we suggest you be at least 16; your mom might not appreciate your using her Subaru to pick up dates before you have your license.

by Trish Bendix

A BUNCH OF LESBIANS WALK INTO AN AWARDS SHOW … Several AfterEllen.com folks attended Logo’s NewNowNext Awards last Monday night in MTV’s TRL studio in Times Square, where Bridget McManus and Jill Bennett presented awards, Dara Nai and Karman Kregloe interviewed people for a future We’re Getting Nowhere episode, and Lori, Dee and I hung out with the women of 3Way and ate too many pigs in a blanket.

Others in attendance? Elizabeth Keener, God-des and She, Chagmion Antoine, and whole lot of well-dressed gay men, plus gay-friendly straight women like Cyndi Lauper and Leona Lewis.

Here are some photos of us at the event: Bridget, Jill and Michelle Paradise rocked their award presentations, and the Cliks gave a great performance during the show, but unfortunately, only two lesbians actually won awards – the Cliks for Brink of Fame: Music and Julie Goldman for Brink of Fame: Comic.

(A Shot at Love With Tila Tequila won in the Most Guiltiest Pleasure category, but that’s more like a vote against lesbian and bi women.)

But these were the winners chosen by Logo’s academy (i.e., a panel of industry folks). Voting for the online winner of these awards (i.e., “the people’s choice”) is still going on, and those winners will be revealed when the show airs on June 7. So go vote now to contribute to lesbian world domination!

Then watch the awards in their entirety on AfterEllen.com on the evening of Saturday, June 7, when we’ll post the show and WGNs coverage of it. (Yes, that’s how I spend my Saturday nights – uploading videos. Jealous?)

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE! Out on DVD on Tuesday: Degrassi Season 6 (the one where Alex becomes a stripper and Paige becomes a completely different character).

In case you missed it: Exes & Ohs has been renewed for a second season.

This week’s episode of What’s YOUR Problem? will be posted later today, and on Saturday, Retro Reviewing takes on Go Fish!

We had a great time at the NYC meet-and-greet on Sunday! I’ve posted a bunch of photos from it on the blog, and the We’re Getting Nowhere team will be posting their episode about it on Wednesday. Thanks to everyone who attended!

Lastly, due to the Memorial Day weekend here in the U.S., there will be a smaller number of blog posts on Monday. (We need our beauty sleep! Or, at least some beauty rest.) But there will be a new article, and a new episode of Liz Feldman’s show. Her guest on Monday is someone who has played a lesbian in the past (but not on The L Word this time); who recently guest-starred on a popular medical drama; and who made our Hot 100 list last year. Leave your best guesses in the comments!

by Sarah Warn

That’s it for this week! Got the inside scoop on a hot new lesbian/bi actor/musician/TV show/film? Tell us at [email protected]. Check back next Friday for another edition of Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever.

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