“Cashmere Mafia” Recaps: Episode 1.4 “The Deciders”

Previously on — Last week, Zoe watched on in disgust as a blond bizbo in her office slept her way to the middle. Juliet used one of the Osmond Brothers for her let’s-not-and-say-we-did revenge sex scheme to get back at Davis. Mia realized just how very sour her ex-fiancé’s grapes are. Caitlin learned what it’s like to be the target of gossip just because she eats noodles in a canoe with a lady.

Annihilation chamber — Zoe and Eric are in the playground, planning their son’s laser tag birthday party. Or, more accurately, Zoe is running about, showing Eric the setup she envisions, complete with an artillery wall, recharging stations and an annihilation chamber, while he looks on passively. This is a dude who knows when to get out of the way.

Zoe’s not sure if an annihilation chamber is going to be too expensive. I don’t even know what that is, but if you can afford those shoes, surely you can splurge and give young Luke the party he so richly deserves.

Zoe is determined this party not be a repeat of last year’s, in which she ruined her son’s birthday by doing something so heinous that she and Eric don’t say it aloud. But the implication is clear, and we’re left to assume it had something to do with a Blackberry, a Bluetooth and a bar graph.

Eric tells Zoe not to worry and assures her that she is, in fact, Supermom. Faster than a speeding deadline, more powerful than a loco client, able to overcompensate with a single platinum Amex.

As usual, Zoe’s phone starts ringing and she rushes off to the office, leaving Eric to ponder what an "artillery wall" is and how to make one out of monkey bars.

Watch your back — When Zoe arrives at the office, she finds that Katherine, the bizbo bane of her existence, has Zoe’s client in the conference room. The client is yet another flip-flop-wearing dotcom millionaire dude with an impressive Halo 3 high score and no socks.

Zoe takes Katherine out into the hallway for a friendly smack-down and reminder about who’s the boss.

Katherine: Zoe, Clayton promoted me because he has confidence in my abilities. He keeps telling me to take more initiative.
Zoe: Yeah, and we’re all very appreciative of your abilities. But Clayton isn’t handling this deal, I am. Which means that —
Katherine: That you’re pulling rank.
Zoe: That I’m responsible for everything that happens on this deal. Which means I lead, you follow. And you don’t make a move without clearing it with me first.
Katherine: OK, I hear you and I get it. I’m really sorry. Would it be OK with you if I peed before heading back into the conference room?

Oh, Katherine. No one has confidence in any of your abilities except the one that involves being limber and open-minded.

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