“Faking It” recap (2.7): Come Through My Window

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Previously on Faking It, Amy disembarked from the good ship Karmy and boarded Reamy, a ship name I can never write without thinking of Joyce “The Reamer” Wischnia, bless her heart.  Shane started sleeping with absurdly handsome but firmly closeted MMA fighter Duke Lewis Jr., even though it made him feel like his heart was being roundhouse kicked. Theo continued to be an undercover police officer to Lauren’s great puzzlement. And Karma and Liam, like Cho and Harry before them, discovered that dating is hard work because you have to, like, talk and things. Like, to each other and not just on the phone to your respective best friends.

This episode jumps forward two weeks, and while I am sad to miss all the awkward first dates between Reagan and Amy, I can’t be too bitter, because it really hits all its marks, both dramatic and comedic. So we open up at Hester High, where Karma is bemoaning the fact that Amy is now residing in Girlfriendland, a state of being where you run into your friend just long enough to notice all the new hickeys on her neck, and then she disappears back into a haze of estrogen and takeout food (there is takeout food like you WOULDN’T BELIEVE in GirlfriendLand).

fakingit7.1TRUE FACT: I HAD THAT EXACT SAME SHIRT IN HIGH SCHOOL. IF AMY WERE HOLDING THE BOOK IN FRONT OF HER FACE AND HAD A CELL PHONE HOLSTER ON HER BELT THAT COULD LITERALLY BE A PICTURE OF ME.

Karma: So can we please schedule some you and me time?  I need some cuddles.  I’ve tried it with Liam but he’s all bony and uncomfortable; it’s like being hugged by a bag of hammers.
Amy: I would, but I am booked solid. Wednesday Reagan and I are going on a queer bike ride around the city.  (I am super into bikes now.) Thursday, we’re attending a screaming of Bend It Like Beckham (it’s like a screening but you yell “KISS” at the screen the entire time).  Friday we’re going bowling so we can steal the shoes, and Saturday we’re going to a vegan communal dinner.
Karma: But you hate vegans! And sharing!
Amy: I know, but lately I have just been thinking a lot about how we need to be responsible stewards of the Earth, sharing its bounty with our fellow creatures.

fakingit7.2WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO YOU.

Karma is anxious to meet the girl who has stolen her best friend, but Amy stalls her, claiming she wants to wait until she’s really sure they like each other. See, this is a line you could only use to fool your straight friends, because any queermo would be like, “It’s been TWO WEEKS; I know y’all have picked out puffy drapes for your first apartment.”

And sure enough…

fakingit7.3I JUST FEEL LIKE WE HAVE BEEN IN LOVE IN A THOUSAND PAST LIVES. LIKE PROBABLY WE WERE DINOSAURS TOGETHER.

OK, so now is a good time to talk about the age gap between Amy and Reagan. When this scene came on, my girlfriend leaned over to me and was like, “Um how old is the blonde one supposed to be again?” And I instantly answered, “Sixteen.” That’s right; I have unilaterally decided Amy’s age and it is canon from this point forward in these recaps. Because a 15-year-old making out with a 19-year-old is way too squishy for me to enjoy the way I want to enjoy this scene. Even 16 and 19 gives one a moment of pause.  Now I am 27 and my girlfriend is 32, which for us is no big deal except for certain hilarious times when I joke that she is a cradle-robber and I am a grave-robber. So when I first thought about the age difference between Amy and Reagan, it didn’t bother me, until I remembered what a big deal it was when I was a teenager. If one of my friends had told me they were dating a 19-year-old, I would have been concerned that the relationship was inherently imbalanced. After all, what can someone who is probably two years into college get out of being with someone who can’t even feel guilty about not voting in the midterm elections?  Of course, if that 16-year-old has Rita Volk’s face and Amy’s taste in documentaries, the situation might be a little different. But it is worth keeping an eye on.

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