“Once Upon A Time” recap (4.3): We All Scream for Ice Cream

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Previously on Once Upon A Time, Emma went back in time and returned with two stowaways, Elsa and Marion, which is wreaking havoc on Storybrooke. Also, Rumpelstiltskin is the Dark One again, Mary Margaret somehow got elected mayor, and there’s still no sign of nor word from Ruby, Mulan, or Aurora.

We open on Robin Hood and Roland giving Marian a tour of Storybrooke. Roland says that his favorite thing is ice cream, and that he’d like some right now please. When it seemed like his parents might be hesitant to the idea, he says Regina always let him get ice cream, which sends Robin into a guilt-panic that leads them to the ice cream shop.

There they meet Madame Scoops. At least, that’s what I’m calling her for now, because no matter how many people she met or names she learned, she never once told them what to call her, and I have no proof that she is the queen of anything. Since this is Marian’s first foray into the magical world of frozen treats, Madame Scoops offers her a cone on the house, complete with cyanide sprinkles. She smiles sweetly at them and says their happy family warms her heart in a way that makes me feel like she means the sight of them stirs icy blue fires of hatred within her.

OUAT 403-1At least she’s not turning green?

Meanwhile, Emma leads Elsa and Hook to Gold’s Shop, where they demand answers. Elsa doesn’t remember how she got into the urn, and Rumple feigns ignorance about the whole ordeal. Emma warns him that she has a superpower that will let her know when she’s being lied to. Just like she knew right away that she was dating a flying monkey that one time.

To prove he’s not lying, he tells Belle to use the Dark One’s dagger on him to force him to tell the truth. Belle doesn’t like the idea, but hasn’t had much to do by way of plot since she married Rumple, so she finally agrees. After she commands him to tell the truth, he repeats that he knows nothing, and they all go on in search of a new source of answers.

Flash back to Elsa pacing around her castle in Arendelle, worrying about her sister. Kristoff tries to calm her down, and uses words Anna gave him to convince Elsa that her kingdom needs her more than Anna does right now. Elsa gets that Kristoff is trying to help, but is finding him rather irritating, in the way only someone dating your sibling can be. A guard interrupts and tells them that scouts noticed an army nearby planning an attack, and Elsa sends the Ice Master away.

OUAT 403-2 She doesn’t have time for his reindeer games.

In present-day Storybrooke, Mary Margaret is taking what I thought to be a very random and unofficial attribution of authority very seriously, and is holding a “fireside chat” in the office formerly known as Regina’s. She tries to go by an itinerary, but Grumpy starts raging and everyone starts following in his hysterical footsteps, when a lock of Marian’s hair turns white and she collapses.

Over at Granny’s, Regina brings Henry some comic books, all ponytail and vest and smiles.

OUAT 403-3 Reason #329 Regina needs a happy ending—THAT SMILE.

She picks up one that says “SHIELD” on it and presumably ogles Agent May for a second before asking Henry about his storybook and who he thinks wrote it. He knows this isn’t the type of thing she’d just be casually curious about, so he asks her what gives. She confesses that she has a plan: to find the author of this story, this weaver of fates, and ask for a happy ending. Henry surprises her by being totally on board because he knows she’s been misrepresented in the plot and deserves a happy ending (and maybe a girlfriend). She decides to call this Operation Mongoose. At first I thought this was completely arbitrary, but in my research (aka my skimming of a Wikipedia article) I found out that they’re particularly good at defeating snakes. Specifically cobras. I see what you did there, Regina.

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