“The Fosters” (2.8) recap: Freak like me


Previously on The Fosters, Callie and Jude pretended they were in an early 2000’s rap video and hung out on the Quinn’s yacht. Mariana realized that “practice makes perfect” isn’t just a stupid thing moms say to get you to do your homework, Jesus started to realize that maybe Hayley wasn’t being straight with him about anything except being a stage five clinger, and Brandon told Stef and Mike about Dani raping him.

We open in the kitchen of course where Mariana is trying to convince Stef to let her cook dinner with Hayley for Jesus and Mat. Stef isn’t sure she wants to hand over the keys to the dream kitchen to Mariana but relents when she’s promised leftovers. The way to Stef ‘s heart is clearly via her stomach (e.g. pancakes, guacamole).

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We’re back at Girls United, and it feels so good. Becca is like a new woman. She is happy and about to head home to live with her mom who is super sorry about all those boyfriends who used to molest Becca. Everyone is happy for Becca and enjoying her sunny disposition. Continuing with the good news, Rita (Hi Rosie!) says that Cole has gotten a spot in the LGBT group home. He seems less thrilled about this than he would have been on our last visit. Maybe he is enjoying being the only rooster in the hen house these days. Callie is visiting so she can help with community day. Rita introduces her to Devonee, who rolls her eyes like a pro and then disgorges her life story and how Girls United is bullshit. She’s charming. Rita tells her, if you want to be a Peach you’re going to have to pass etiquette. Gracefully and grandly, Marla.

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Callie heads upstairs and Becca invites her to spend the weekend in her room so she can send Devonee elsewhere, like Cole’s room or the hellmouth. Callie is loyal to Cole and doesn’t want to ditch him but tells Becca she’s proud of all the hard work she’s done. When she goes into Cole’s room she finds him making out with Devonee. He tells Callie that maybe she could stay with Becca so he and Devonee could, you know. Callie agrees because she’s awesome like that.

Back home, Stef gets a text from Lena who is a) in the woods chaperoning a bunch of seventh grade boys or b) giving birth in real life and can’t come to the set right now. She shows Jesus the picture Lena sent and then tells him that she wants to talk about sex. It’s a weird mom segue and Jesus would rather they go back to talking about the seventh grade camping trip. So, sometimes people, even teenage boys, have these feelings and sometimes having sex makes them more complicated. Jesus nods and says he’s using condoms. Apparently, boy wonder thinks condoms protect you from feelings. Stef tries one more tack before sending him off to do his homework. When Stef opens the mail and finds a letter from extortionist of the year, Ana.

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Down in the Girls United basement, Callie and Kiara are getting some folding chairs and discussing whether or not Devonee is gay or not because she makes out with Cole. We’ll call this an understated PSA to remind folks that sexual orientation and gender identity have nothing to do with each other. Kiara’s foster family fell through and she is feeling pretty cranky about that and the fact Callie now has two families that want her. Callie wants to know why Kiara is being a jerk and Kiara wants to know why Callie is there. “She doesn’t even go here!”

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