Archive

“House of Cards” recap (2.9): When We Care Too Much

Early morning and someone squashes a bug, works his core, and hits the inversion table. It’s Freddy. He walks to work and grabs his paper – the one with Claire’s scandal right on the cover. Freddy tears it in half and sets it on fire. I have a feeling Claire will be doing something similar soon, only it won’t be paper.

Ooh, Jodie Foster directed this episode. Nice work, ma’am!

At Murky Towers, we’re of course having a cosy little War Room conference about the scandal, with Doug, Claire, Seth, and Frank. I’ve been deeply curious to know how this is playing with Frank. Last season I was under the impression that having affairs is just something the Underwoods did with one of those quiet understandings. But I’m guessing that part of the understanding was that nothing should hit the papers. And sometimes those understandings have a way of falling apart once things get less quiet.

Doug says no one at the Daily will cough up about sources, but duh, it’s Remy. There’s also a concern that Adam Galloway will go public. Claire says he wouldn’t, that she’ll make sure of it. Frank’s not crazy about Claire being the one to take care of that little errand, but she says “I’ve got it covered,” in that deceptively cool tone of voice that makes him back down. The meeting breaks up with Frank telling Seth to follow Claire’s lead and Seth immediately starting to work on a timeline of her association with Galloway. Frank moves into the next room to talk to us directly. He says “this hurts us both, but it’s not my wound to suture.” Claire needs to be the one to stop the bleeding.

Back at Freddy’s, the suit guy with the franchise contracts has a mock-up of the barbecue sauce bottle design and just a few little things to sign before Freddy gets his $95,000. Suit Guy steps just a little too far – he pulls out plans for the flagship restaurant in Silver Spring, complete with fake peeling linoleum. Suit Guy says they don’t want it to look too nice, and Freddy says, “You want white folks to feel like they’re slumming.” Ouch. Suit Guy babbles about atmosphere and how people want the “experience” without leaving the suburbs. Freddy sums up the role he’s being asked to play with a succinct word that we don’t use on this website. Freddy hates this, but he signs. He’s supposed to get his money in about a week.

Claire is on the phone with Galloway, asking him to deny the affair, deny taking the picture of her in the bed, and deny pretty much everything except that maybe they once curtly nodded at each other as part of a business relationship. She wants him to destroy the original of the picture – the original that he has right there — then e-mail her a copy of the digital file and then destroy the original digital file. Adam tells Claire that he watched her big CNN interview. He misses talking with her.

Claire asks Adam how’s tricks, and he sums up that he went to Bogotá, Colombia and long story short, new girlfriend who’s living with him now. Claire seems surprisingly thrown by this piece of information. And saddened how quickly things happen. Adam says he won’t talk to the press until he gets instructions… And then kisses his new girlfriend.

Freddy walks to a run-down apartment building and his way is blocked by three scumballs who say he has to buy something if he wants to get inside. Freddy makes it clear just through sheer umbrage that he is no one to be messed with and the creeps, somehow sensing the intense core work that has already happened today, back down. I don’t think Freddy is someone you want to get angry.

Freddy knocks on a much-graffitied door. It’s opened by his surprised grandson. His grandson is mostly surprised because he hasn’t met Freddy before.

Frank’s stuck in Murky Towers until they can clamp down on the scandal, so he’s doing a little work on his model while he takes a call from the President. He assures Walker that if anything were true, Frank would tell him. Lies roll so easily off Frank’s tongue sometimes, like he’s swirling hard candies in his mouth. Walker offers to make a statement and stand behind the Underwoods, which is awfully sweet. And super dumb. Frank primly instructs the President on how he should respond instead, refusing to dirty his hands and saying he doesn’t engage in gossip-mongering. It’s interesting that the President just accepts that now.

Frank excuses himself to go watch Adam Galloway’s statement to the press.

Adam, as he has been told, stands in front of a bank of his cameras with his girlfriend, stating that there was no romantic relationship and that he didn’t take the photograph. He and his fiancée – whoopsie, that’s a different thing than a girlfriend, last time I checked – are very sorry that the Underwoods have to go through this.

Seth delicately suggests that Claire should change her clothes before her press conference, because he has accurately gauged the American tendency to equate the book with the cover. Claire agrees and sets off to dig up a Conservative Tea Lady outfit.

Claire apologizes to Frank, saying she should have been more careful, but he won’t even chasten her for that. Yes, their dragonlove does include an out clause for affairs. I guess that sort of thing is easier to navigate when you each have three hearts and a thousand years of living behind you.

Claire admits that she wishes Frank would be more upset. Frank responds “Tusk came after you because of me. It’s you who should be upset.” If I directed this episode, the show would immediately cut to a shot of Tusk out bird watching, and then suddenly Claire’s spiked tail punches straight through his chest, but Ms. Foster seems to want to play her hand a little more close to the vest. Fine. Claire agrees with Frank that being upset is wasted energy, and then he says “Shall we rehearse?” and off they go.

Freddy’s son Darnell is refusing a handout, but Freddy corrects that this is a loan he’s offering – and a way to get a house for his son and grandson. Darnell can pay it off slowly by working in the restaurant. Freddy and his son have not gotten along well in the past – Darnell’s time in prison may have something to do with that – and this offer is not mending fenced the way Freddy had hoped. He takes off.

Seth is talking to the press, spinning and lying and spinning and lying. He adds the genius touch that the Underwoods have taken a full day to respond because they’re looking into their defamation and slander lawsuit options. And now the reporters can wait another 30 before their next slice. Ayla? Is not having any more of this cheap tabloid fodder. She peaces out and is booking herself a flight to St. Louis before the other reporters have finished flipping their little notebook pages. OK, those are some reporting instincts that border on psychic.

Claire and Frank step out of Murky towers, trying not to blink as they step into the daylight. She and Frank join hands and let the ridges down their backs brush against each other.

Claire looks like, well, Claire. It’s a wonder the reporters don’t all rush out to buy hats just so they can rush back, tip them in apology, and then walk away, ashamed of themselves for bothering such a creature.

Claire steps up to the microphone and talks about the hurt that these accusations have brought her. The very idea that she could be unfaithful to her husband!

And then she and Frank whip out some clothesline and a few pins and hang Adam out to dry. They cannot imagine why he would deny taking such a beautiful photo when they themselves commissioned it. They claim the photo was taken right there at Murky Towers – an obvious lie, because you can see who’s in it – as a birthday present for Frank, who loves how beautiful Claire is when she’s sleeping.

Adam watches his television, stunned speechless, as Claire claims that the he, the poor dear, must have been intimidated by the media. Yes, it’s a killer move with a nice little fuck-you-and-your-new-fiancée half-twist, but Adam doesn’t need to be that surprised. Did he not notice who Claire was while he was sleeping with her? Later, Adam is extra-pissed. He looks like an idiot and now there are squads of reporters rappelling down his building. Claire explains that coordinated answers would have looked like coordinated answers, and they couldn’t tell him what they were planning to do because fuck you and your new fiancée. Adam can confirm their version or he can have reporters all up in his jockeys for the next three news cycles. Adam hangs up on Claire. Hangs. Up. On Claire. Adam does not know the rules of this world. Frank offers Claire a cigarette, but she’s going to get some shuteye. Frank calls Doug and tells him to get to Murky Towers with Seth pronto.

Frank is thinking lawsuit, but Seth says the paper won’t settle because more time in court equals more papers sold. Doug says that having the President make a statement isn’t a bad idea, but Seth contradicts him and says nope, introducing the President is introducing a press operation they can’t control, and coordination looks bad. Frank defers to Seth’s judgment and steps away to get another drink.

Doug is all over Seth like a wetsuit, making it clear that Doug isn’t going to get Connored out of a job. Seth tries to play dumb for a nanosecond, then just rolls with it. Doug, like me, does not believe for one second that Seth just turned over the abortion doctor’s journal, the one that could ruin Claire, without a backup plan. Seth admits that those are good instincts, but claims he’s telling the truth. Uh huh.

Frank hilariously watches them fight from the kitchen window. Of course he knows exactly what’s going on. He says a little sibling rivalry is good for each other. They’ll either Fight Club each other into being stronger or the weak one will get kicked out of the nest. It really is a good thing that the Underwoods didn’t have children, don’t you think?

Adam and his fiancée arrive in his gallery to find Remy, who wants more proof that the affair happened. Adam tries to kick him out, but Remy trumps that gesture by showing a phone with a bunch of calls to and from Bogotá. Uh-oh.

Back at Freddy’s, there’s a line down the block. Freddy’s son shows up to work for him. For about half a minute, the show lets Freddy and Darnell think that things might be looking up.

Tusk’s assistant calls him because Ayla won’t leave the lobby. Tusk is very interested to hear that someone from the Vice Presidential press corps is there. Ayla has overplayed her hand without even knowing she had it. Tusk asks his assistant to send Ayla up.

Claire is back at Murky Towers, reassuring Tricia Walker over the phone that she’s fine. Seth walks in with a tablet and the news that Adam has given his statement to the press… In the form of a much more explicit photograph of Claire in the shower. Claire calmly gets off the phone. The face of the woman in the shower is partially obscured, and Seth asks if it’s really Claire. She immediately says “No,” and then quickly moves through “It might be,” and “It could be,” to “It probably is.” This sequence could have broken down into comedy if they had played it even slightly differently, but everybody walked that tightrope just fine, so we’re all still pretty much on edge.

Claire says she didn’t know he took the picture (Gross, Adam. That is super creepy and gross. We are done with you.) and then when Seth points out that based on her haircut in the picture, the timeline Claire gave him for the affair was bogus. Claire says that hey, just because she said the affair was over more than two years ago doesn’t mean she didn’t visit. Happy that you shoved Connor out of that job now, Seth?

Tusk is spinning his venture with Feng as he talks to Ayla, a little surprised that she knows so much about Chinese politics (and about his business). And that’s not all she knows about: Ayla rattles off the things she believes are intertwined, including Feng, Tusk, the bridge venture, the Gilgamesh subsidy, and Tusk’s former bromance with the President. Tusk tips his hand with the thing that non-guilty people shout all the time: “Who sent you!?” Tusk tries to pull it back by saying that, sure, he gets paranoid because as a rich guy people are always after him, ha, ha, and OK, seriously, why is she in St. Louis instead of trailing after Underwood? Ayla says it’s her gut. Tusk asks if she misses Tehran, because during the ten minutes he kept her waiting, Tusk found out everything about Ayla, including where she used to be stationed and why she left. (Hint: Tehran.)

Tusk offers Ayls a vase his wife got him from Tehran. It broke during shipping, and he wants to remind Ayla how hard it can be to put something back together again once it’s been crushed. That’s a damn fine threat. I wonder if Tusk has crates and crates of broken-and-repaired vases in his back room from all over the world so he can use location-appropriate threats no matter who drops by. Tusk makes sure Ayla knows much he hates reporters and how much he loves retaliating against them. And then he gets right up in Ayla’s face and says that America can be just as dangerous as Tehran. Ayla thanks him for his time and leaves with as much dignity as she can.

Tusk leaps to the conclusion that Ayla is there for Frank, and immediately calls Remy. He tells him not to hold back; hit him again, and hit him hard. Sir, you will not be annoying Claire this way. I eagerly await your lavish punishment.

Freddy counts up the day’s take and it’s his best one yet. Darnell mops up and it looks like things are really smoothing out between them. However, Darnell doesn’t like the fact that Freddy is carrying all that cash around. He thinks Freddy should have a gun, and just happens to have one on hand to loan him. Freddy is not amused that Darnell is violating his parole. He gives Darnell some serious Real Talk about how there’s some potential real good, like managing a chain of franchises good, coming their way, so how about not blowing it all by getting sent back to prison? Darnell’s mouth says yes, but his eyes say maybe.

Seth is talking to a woman whose bone structure is a lot like Claire’s, telling her how short she’d need to cut her hair for this “modeling job.” Oh, and he needs to know how well spoken she is. Like when, just for a random example, she is issuing a statement to the press.

Claire is in bed at Murky Towers, reading a new news piece about Freddy’s old conviction for armed robbery and a little vehicular manslaughter of two senior citizens on the side. The news story explicitly connects Frank to Freddy. Yup, more Tusk. At least Frank’s the one taking the hit this time. Frank summons Seth. (Not Doug? Hmm.)

Frank wants to issue as simple statement that Freddy has served his time, so buzz off, but Seth counters that the Underwoods cannot afford to look any shadier, what with naked Claire on the front page of every newspaper in the country. Frank hunts for (and finds!) hidden cigarettes while, to his credit, refusing to tank Freddy’s new business just as it’s taking off. He demands that Seth bring Freddy over for a press conference in the morning.

The next day, Freddy and Darnell try to walk to work as some truly horrible paparazzos rush up to harass them. The paps get rude and next thing you know, Darnell has pulled a gun on the worst of them. Uh-oh. The only person who’s happy about this is Chekov.

On CNN, “professional model” Stephanie Daldrey is happily explaining how easy it was for her and Seth to create a really close fake of Claire’s shower photo. Candy Crowley points out that fakery is a serious allegation. Seth is throwing so much shade that crops may never grow in New York state again. He’s calling Adam a publicity hound and also “potentially troubled.”

Claire and Frank get dressed and are perfectly calm as they watch the trashing. Adam and his fiancée are less so.

Seth arrives at Murky Towers to let the still-gussying Underwoods know that Freddy’s son is in custody. Frank immediately changes tack to go see Freddy. Seth objects because “it’s the projects” and Seth is a douche. Claire objects for different reasons. “Freddy is dangerous because you care too much,” she says, “And when we care too much, it blinds us.”

If Claire has a tattoo of anything, it’s “When we care too much, it blinds us.” This scene is pretty great, with Claire finding her calm and trying to rein in Frank by standing almost perfectly still while he buzzes around her. I think that Foster woman might have some directing chops.

Claire wants Frank to stay focused, but she can’t control him this time, maybe for the first time. Frank leaves.

Back at Adam’s Suddenly Much Colder Love Den, his as-yet-unnamed fiancée wonders if she can get him something to eat. And also who blew dragon flame through her pillow. Adam snarls and broods over his trashing, finally realizing how ruthless the Underwoods really are. Fiancée notes that getting worked up isn’t going to change anything. Evidently Adam has a type. The phone rings, and the music suggests that this is no telemarketer.

A disguised Frank gets into a black SUV and roars off. Freddy opens his door and there Frank is with his Secret Service team in incognito hoodies. Frank and Freddy bond over blues, and then Frank gets down to brass tacks. Freddy’s son has a bail set for $60,000. Freddy asks after Claire, and Frank accurately estimates her suit of armor at three inches thick. “Somebody’s trying to take you out,” says Freddy. He also says whoever it is just stepped on the wrong rattlesnake. Close, Freddy. But a little bigger, and with wings.

Frank explains that he needs to distance himself from Freddy. Aw, man. I was hoping he’d hold a little firmer on that. And Frank isn’t coming in for ribs anymore. Freddy says that he couldn’t if he wanted to: The suits are pulling out of the deal, and Freddy is selling his own place for Darnell’s bail. Oh, and Freddy isn’t getting his 95 grand – there was a morality clause in the contract. He can get 45 grand for the storefront.

Frank offers to help Freddy with the money, to make it a loan, just like Frank did with Darnell. But Freddy won’t take his “guilt money.” Frank accuses Freddy of being prideful and Freddy elaborates on his gangbanger past. Whoa, Freddy killed a lot of people. He and Frank really do have a surprising amount in common. Freddy says all he can do is make his own way. Frank raps on the table to strengthen his knuckles for the next fight and gets up to leave. He says the offer of money is still open. Freddy tells Frank he was just a good customer; there’s no need to pretend he was a friend. That was one honest conversation.

Back in his car, scenery flashing past him across the window, Frank tells us we should indeed think he’s a hypocrite. “The road to power is paved with hypocrisy and casualties,” he explains. “Never regret.”

Adam is frisked and metal-detected, then feels and stumbles his way past the light-absorbing wall sconces of Murky Towers. Frank makes sure he left his phone and unnamed fiancée at home. The Underwoods explain why coordinating for damage control is so necessary and get so annoyed when Adam points out that they lied to him. Can you imagine getting the Double Underwood treatment?

Inez – HER NAME IS INEZ – has a dad who’s a human rights activist in Bogotá, currently imprisoned. Remy, it turns out, threatened to get her father executed if Adam didn’t cooperate. Dang, Remy. I knew Tusk was vicious, but that’s a hell of an order to carry out. I would now like to see Doug and Remy compete in an evil-off cage match.

Frank says he can get the charges dropped on account of hanging out with the Secretary of State and stuff, and Adam makes the grave mistake of snapping at Claire. Frank won’t have it. I absolutely love how Frank won’t tolerate the slightest amount of disrespect in her direction. When Adam wonders what kind of husband Frank is, he gets a quick, firm schooling on the depths of dragon love. Claire watches, the fire in her eyes flaring as Frank says:

“Do not mistake any history you have shared for the slightest understanding of what our marriage is, or how insignificant you are in comparison.”

Claire loves it when he talks like that, she really does. You can see her scales ruffle in a wave of pleasurable shiver and then smooth back down. She asks for a moment alone with Adam and Frank says sure, because there is no more boss-ass way to drive home the fact of Adam’s insignificance than to leave his wife alone with her former lover because Frank has more important things to pay attention to.

Adam is upset because his reputation is ruined and possibly also his career and he’s now the guy who put his fiancée’s life in danger and Claire has never caused him anything but pain. Claire reflects on how much ordinary mortals are like gnats, swooping around your face and irritating you with all their pettiness. Adam says that he loves Inez more than he ever loved Claire. Her only reaction is a slight adjustment of her outfit. Claire starts telling Adam the plan in the most impersonal possible terms, and he truly has not understood the Underwoods, or he would be gibbering in fear right now. He’s going to be driven back to New York, and then he’s going to release a statement saying this was all a publicity stunt.

Adam tries to object for just a moment and Claire cuts him right down. He can take the humiliating out they’re giving him, or he can get buried by the Underwoods. Adam says he finally knows what it’s like to hate someone and Claire rises to meet him. She says “It’s a terrible feeling, isn’t it?” And she walks right out.

Remy is getting no answer on Adam’s phone. He calls Tusk. Tusk, awesomely surrounded by parakeets, absorbs the news that their extortion-through-state-sponsored-murder plan is falling apart. Enough high-level governmental muckety-mucks are involved that the judge can’t just slide by a rush conviction. Tusk – holy crap, that really is a lot of parakeets – looks for some wiggle room. To be clear: Wiggle room for getting a man he’s never met executed to punish another man he’s never met because he’s not helping to humiliate the wife of the guy Tusk is actually trying to get. Tusk wants to make sure Remy is not just giving up on their little social networking project.

Remy points out that he can’t circumvent the entire State Department. Tusk, now yelling at his birds to be quiet, bitches that he hired Remy to destroy Frank and where are his shiny scandal and murder and will you shut UP, bird? Remy tries to demote himself from henchman back to lobbyist, but Tusk doesn’t employ people who won’t at least pull out a good murder by proxy. Remy says he’ll figure something out and hangs up. Tusk walks back down the line of bird cages, snaps the neck of the bird that’s been bothering him, and just drops it on the floor, presumably as a warning to the others. It’s a tough world for pets on this show.

Adam sets up a video camera to record his statement. The charges have been dropped, and Inez tells him not to go through with it. But Adam’s going to release the Underwoods’ statement to protect her father from getting caught up again and to protect them both from Claire. Too late: One quick look at Inez’s eyes and we all know that her respect for him is gone, and she’ll be leaving soon after.

Seth tells the Underwoods they’re out of the woods and they swing straight back into business mode. Claire immediately asks Frank to push on her assault bill. Seth starts to suggest preparing for tomorrow’s interview, but Doug backhands him across the room and Seth immediately defers to Doug’s judgment. Doug wins, and Frank tacitly acknowledges that Doug may eat Seth for the protein should the time come.

More important, it’s time to go Full Underwood on that budgie-murdering bastard Tusk. Frank wants him obliterated, but Claire wants better. She turns to Frank:

“Let’s make him suffer.”

It’s the simplest sentiments that warm your heart the most.

Frank turns to us and tells us he doesn’t know whether proud or terrified. Just as I am shouting “BOTH, FRANK, BOTH!” at the screen, he adds “Perhaps both.”

It’s sweet, in a bone-chilling sort of way, how even Frank doesn’t see the full depths of Claire’s scariness. He hasn’t seen her threaten a fetus like we have. I wonder what would happen if someone ever saw and understood the full depths of Claire. Probably your brain just gives up and crumbles straight into soot. Very impressed soot.

Frank and Claire join hands and twine their tails, feeling the soothing pulse as their six hearts beat in sync together. And then they skip off to feed on others so the Underwoods can fly higher.

Freddy pulls a fence across his storefront and locks it, then gives the keys to Suit Guy. The whole place is probably getting knocked down – it’s worth more as an empty lot. Freddy won’t even take a memento. Eyes ahead.

Goddamn, this was a great episode. Well done, everyone.

The real suffering starts next week. I’ll see you then.

Lesbian Apparel and Accessories Gay All Day sweatshirt -- AE exclusive

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Back to top button