Previously on The Fosters, Jesus went on a hunger strike for the sake of his wrestling career, Mariana whined about her suspension from school cutting her chances of getting the clap from Chase down to nil, and Judicorn got semi-sexiled so Jesus could have some time alone with himself. Callie finally figured out that maybe having people who love you enough to help are worth trying for and resigned herself to stay in Girls United Against Brandon for a while longer. Lena might want to have a baby in spite of the bonanza of stupid happening around her house from the teenagers. Stef refused her father’s offer of a BEAUTIFUL TOYOTA because a Prius will not erase a lifetime of shaming your daughter. A Maserati, however, might. Lena called Stef a “mule,” Stef called her a “nag” but then relented and went to make nice with her Pops. Sadly, Frank went to the great beyond without so much as an “I’m sorry we’re so similarly stubborn” from his daughter.
We open with Stef finding her dad asleep in front of a Padres game (that’s the first clue this isn’t real, last week he was watching football). She hands him a cup of tea and they talk about the Padres. They reminisce about when he took her to her first away game in Chicago and it snowed. Little Stef had never seen snow before and her parents laughed at her when she asked why the sky was so dusty. They both laugh at the memory and we catch a glimpse of their relationship as we never saw it before, free, easy, friendly. Frank laments the fact that things are no longer so easy. Life gets complicated. Walls are built, brick-by-brick, with every hurtful word, every misunderstanding, and it’s hard to pull them back down again because mortar made from pain is strong stuff. Stef walks to the doorway and smiles when snow begins to fall around her. She turns back to her father but his chair is empty. Back at home, Stef wakes up from her bittersweet dream.
Mariana is crying in the bathroom when Jude busts through the door. Knocking is for suckers. It’s Mariana’s first funeral so she asks Jude what his mom’s funeral was like. He tells her it was weird and sad and everyone spent their time telling him that his mom was in a better place. Grown-ups do that to make themselves feel better. Mariana asks if he believes in heaven. He says he thinks there are people looking out for him, or at least he hopes there are. Jude you are surely an angel and if anyone would have an inside scoop on heaven it’s you.
In their bathroom/laundry room, Stef and Lena are doing synchronized make-up application. Lena approaches Stef as though she might break at any minute and tells her that she knows today will be hard and she will do anything Stef needs to help. Stef says, “It’s fine” half a dozen times and, when Lena points out she knows Stef is upset about not talking to Frank, Stef throws in a “it is what it is” for good measure. Say “fine” again, Stef. Lena makes a joke about her mother bringing enough bitter to make Old Fashioneds for the entire city of San Diego and Stef cracks the smallest smile. They switch gears away from the death of Stef’s father to deal with the real issue of the day, how to keep Callie and Brandon from getting handsy during the funeral. Lena leaves to get everyone ready. Stef hunts for her mascara and stumbles upon Lena’s prenatal vitamins. Well, this is just going to be most fun ever!
Callie is sitting the Girls United van. She watches Jude walk up to the church surrounded by the Adams Foster clan and says she has to go to the funeral so Jude won’t have to face it alone. It’s funny all the things we say we’re doing for someone else just to cover up our own aching needs. Dana hugs Stef and apologizes for Lena’s dad not being able to come. Meanwhile, Captain Roberts asks Lena if Mike is around and makes sure Lena will keep Stef from reading the paper. Lena spies Callie and says she’s glad that she came and that she’ll always be a member of the family no matter whether so makes foolish choices to live on her own and make out with Brandon. Stef says, “Hi, love, I’m glad you’re here” just before Sharon walks up, shrouded in dark glasses, and says, “This is going to be a little harder than I thought.” Sharon, you just summed up this entire recap.
Callie’s voice wavers when asks Jude if he’s all right. He says, “Sure, are you?” She nods and takes his hand and they walk up the ramp into the church. We cut to two tiny kids holding hands and a voice saying, “We are here to celebrate the life of Colleen Jacob.”
The family of forty rushes through the door into the Adams Foster home and Lena sends everyone to his or her prearranged battle station for the rest of the afternoon. Stef yells for everyone to put on their Padres colors because death is much easier to take on in matching team apparel. In the midst of the chaos, Jude says, “Mom?” Lena’s face is a marvel as she tries to act like calling her mom is no biggie. He asks if it would be okay for him to invite Connor over. She tells him to go call his buddy and then blinks away a few tears before she tells Stef he used the “m” word. Stef notices Callie standing in the corner and asks if she needs anything. Callie says no and stares at the photo of the family from the wedding.
Brandon appears on the stairs and says it’s too bad his grandfather wasn’t there but that he will always remember that day. Callie’s like, “Yeah, moron, it’s the day your moms got married.” He goes for cute with, “No, it’s the first time we kissed” but overshoots and ends up in Barfsville. She’s smiles but then leaves to go help set up. I’d pick pigs in a blanket over Mr. Creep, too.
Stef is out back wiping down tables when Mike walks in. He and Lena share a laugh over his Padres cap, which he is only wearing because he liked Frank so much. Sure, wearing a Padres cap seems like a small price to pay for the guy who shamed his daughter into marrying you. He asks how Stef is doing and Lena says, “Well on a scale of getting shot to our wedding night? Let’s just say better than I expected.” She asks Mike how he’s doing and he huffs and puffs after she says she talked to Captain Roberts. He says the story is nothing, just a journalist trying to make a story where there isn’t one. Before Lena can press further, Stef walks in and Lena asks Mike to help her set up the poker table.