At last, our long international nightmare is over. So much pain, so much suffering. And for what, I ask you, for what? It’s not like it accomplished anything except confusion, anger and mental anguish. But just like that, poof, it’s over. Wait, you knew I was talking about The Wig, right? Right. Let us never speak of this dark period in all of our lives again.
Bo is working off some frustration in the boxing ring. She’s hitting Dyson. Yay! Now she’s hitting it with Dyson. Boooo! My eyes, MY EYES! First The Wig, now this. It’s like the Lost Girl writers love to watch us suffer, or something. While all this is happening might I suggest you go construct yourself a world-class sandwich. Like really go to town. Use three kinds of meats or cheeses for vegetarians or root vegetables for vegans–though, isn’t that really just a salad?
OK, where were we? Bo is blowing off steam about the whole being kidnapped, memory erased, wanted dead by the Una Mens and most importantly, the continuing lack of word from Lauren thing. Yeah, that’s the woman your boink partner decided to leave stranded on the side of the road. No biggie, not bitter.
At the Suck Shack, Kenzi is girl bonding with Teen Tamsin. The foundation of any good role model and underage ward relationship is the imparting of the skill and art of twerking.
Bo arrives fresh off her sparring match and is promptly burned by the righteous indignation of a million lesbian fans for her transgressions with Dyson. Or some ring of something Kenzi put down in the doorway to protect from malicious Fae is acting up. Whatever. Kenz gives her BFF a big, never-leave-me-again hug.
Teen Tam can’t remember anything about her past still, because she’s 2 weeks old and probably shouldn’t even be eating solid foods yet let alone cheesy poofs. But she does know she’s Dark Fae. And that she loves her some Mulder and Scully. Holy UFO conspiracy theory, is Tam-Tam coming back as a geekier version of herself? Because I will kiss Emily Andras right on the mouth in thanks if it’s so. On. The. Mouth. Get ready, Emily. Get ready.
With their teen charge safely parked in front of an X-Files marathon, Bo and Kenz sneak off for some quality drinking time together. But the Dal is like occupied France dead, so Bo decides to do what Bo does best. And what she does best is making the sexy happen.
I bet Bo’s whole iTunes account is filled with playlists like SexyTimes I, SexyTimes II, Super SexyTimes IV. This particular playlist features Toronto duo Thunderheist sexing it up with “Cruise Low.” Way to local-source your soundtrack, Lost Girl.
Needless to say, dancing, décolletage and undressing happens. You know, just another day in the life of Bo the Unaligned Succubus. Normal, normal.
Kenzi catches Mossimo sneaking out of the all-you-can-sex party and demands more Fae balm. He says she can’t afford it, she says she can’t not afford it. It’s your average, dysfunctional addict and Fae powers pusher relationship. Before leaving the Dal debauchery, Kenzi shows off her Sparkle Motion powers to Bo, who declares it freaking incredible. She wouldn’t think it was so freaking incredible if she knew what Kenz had to do to get it, though.
Flush from a night of dancing and ready to chow down on takeout, Bo and Kenzi return to find the Suck Shack has been stripped. They’ve been robbed. Though, is it robbing if there are holes in the walls that are literally big enough to carry a loveseat through? They rush to see if Tamsin is still OK and find she’s OK and also will no longer will get carded when buying beer. Earlier Teen Tam walked in on the robber and went all Valkyrie on them, which triggered a growth spurt. Now that’s the way to make an entrance, Rachel Skarsten. Welcome back, girl.
Bo goes to Dyson to report her breaking and entering, with Tamsin 2.0 in tow. He seems less worried about the loss of her stylish thrift store furniture and more interested in… OK, gross. A lot of none-too-subtle imagery ensues about going into all the stores and maxing out credit cards. Then Tam asks if she can go along on their “shopping” trip and/or invites herself into a threesome.