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“Chicago Fire” (2.5) recap: Last the night

Previously on Chicago Fire, Shay and Dawson watched a guy blow a hole in his head, and because that wasn’t bad enough, Dawson told Shay it was all her fault. The good ship Shawson is on the rocks and taking on water. Dawson found out that Smarmy Jay was a cop, but still smarmy. Gail McLeod were picked by Byron Montgomery to be captains of Team The Worst, and Boden’s job is in trouble. Finally, Shay marinated her feelings in tequila and found herself making eyes at a pretty lady in a bar.

Dawson is waking up at Smarmy Jay’s house of sex. He comes back with a single mug of coffee. Would it have killed you to make the lady a cup? Amateur. Dawson purrs about what a great morning it is and then they jump back into sexy times and chat about how if she tells anyone Jay’s a cop he’ll be a dead cop. Not exactly your typical pillow talk, but I’m not here to judge. I have to ask, do straight people leave their bras on during sex? Dawson, there’s a shortage of perfect breasts in the world. It’s a pity to cover yours. I’m sure Shay can help you unclasp that sucker if Mr. Only Coffee for Me can’t work it.

Also waking up in an unfamiliar bed is our Leslie Shay. I’d like to take a moment to note that she is not wearing a bra because, in the words of our Amy and Tina, bitches get shit done. Shay reaches for her buzzing phone and answers a call from Amy. She agrees to plans having something to do with a party. In her state, she’d probably agree to spending the night playing canasta with Grunwald in Ravenswood. She looks up to find a camera pointing at the bed and a fully dressed hottie watching her. Shay sits up and looks around and freaks a little at the sight of the camera. “Relax, I’m a photographer,” the lady says and that makes exactly no one feel better. Shay slowly puts the night back together. There were tequila shots and a cab ride, the mention of which causes a smirk to bloom on hottie’s face. Shay grabs her stuff, clutches it to herself and does an awkward walk of shame.

Benny’s late meeting Kelly for coffee because he’s saying goodbye to a woman who I want to say is his daughter (she’s totally not). Benny warns Kelly that he’s got it on good authority that Boden is on his way out and that Kelly has to make a choice. He does not say that he’s the one cheering McLeod as she does the pushing.

Speaking of McLeod, the Chief is meeting with her in her office. She runs through a laundry list of his shortcomings and then tells him that the state would like to save the fire house but send him on his merry way with a early retirement offer. Boden channels a PG-rated Lt. O’Neil and tells Master Chief McLeod to kiss his ass.

Casey, Mouch, and Mills are talking about the Chief while Snitchy Spellman lurks nearby. Mills is pissed that he told Spellman all sorts of stuff about the Chief and then asks Casey if he still has to cook for the guy. Casey follows Spellman out of the room. Shay walks in, exchanges a quick “I can’t believe you blamed me for that guy killing himself but I still love you” look with Dawson before heading to get some coffee. Severide hops up from the couch and asks Shay if she had fun the night before. Her face says “Shit, I didn’t know there would be a test” while she tries to cover for her lack of memory with a “Yeah sure, lots of fun was had doing some stuff.” He says he sent her a few texts and she lies and says she was at Amy’s and got a little drunk. He says that’s fine but he doesn’t want to worry that she’s finally succumbed to the constant danger that follows her around at all times. She says “OK, Dad, I’ll text next time.”

Casey confronts Spellman in the locker room about being the snitch. Spellman refuses to back down and won’t let Casey and the others shove him out like they did with Hadley. I’m not sure aligning yourself with a serial arsonist is your strongest move, Spellman.

Outside the garage, Dawson is filling Herrmann and Otis in on just how close the cops are to busting Arthur. She says all her information is coming from Antonio but she’s a terrible liar. I hope no one else asks her about Jay because man, if this is her lying to protect him, he’s royally screwed. In the middle of all of this they get called out. Saved by the bell, Gabriela. Next time get your story straight.

They find a house with a tree crashed through the top two floors. There’s a baby trapped alone on the second floor because of course there is. The Chief sends small teams in to help on both floors and Dawson and Shay fight over their medic bags because they can’t fight over their feelings. Inside, Shay becomes increasingly inappropriate with a woman being crushed by a tree. Clarke watches as Shay snickers and giggles and stops just short of coming on to the lady. Everyone gets out of the treehouse of horrors alive. Outside, the Chief looks around like a senior on graduation day. Have a bitchin’ summer isn’t going to cover it.

Back at the house, Otis tells Mouch about the party he’s throwing for Shay because they’re besties now. Shay really needs help cheering up and he’s just the guy to do it. Otis is totally the early days David Silver of this group. Boden walks in and tells everyone they need to have a physical by the end of the day. Mouch starts mouthing off and the Chief shuts him down with a roar that would make Katy Perry proud. Boden stalks off to his office and Casey and Severide lock eyes for a quicky before following. Boden tells Casey and Severide that Dolores Umbridge is coming for him. Severide is all, “You’re Dumbledore, you can’t just leave, you have to fight.” Boden looks touched by the sentiment but weary of fighting.

Mills bops up to Shay and says he’ll start the exams with Cruz and Shay can do Dawson. Yes! It’s lesbian Christmas! But no, Shay declines the opportunity to check Dawson over and tells Mills he can do her instead. Mills agrees because he’s a puppy and then realizes that it might be a bit awkward. Mills takes Dawson’s blood and teases her that he’s going to need a stool sample too. She tells him she misses him, and his jokes before asking how things are going with Isabella. He says they are good and assures her that they’ll get back to being friends some day. Friends with your exes? Your lesbian is showing, you two.

In the lounge, Otis is talking up the party to Cruz who seems worried his mixtape mistress will be there Severide. Mouch unveils his campaign poster and Casey steals Isabella to talk to her about what she might be able to do to get Heather moved to a minimum security prison so she can see her kids more.

Shay is taking Clarke’s blood. He has to remind her that she already took his blood pressure, but before he can say more they are called out to one of the grosser calls we’ve seen. It’s a guy with his leg caught in a rototiller. While the boys take the machine apart to get the guy’s leg out, Dawson and Shay jockey over who is going to do what to treat him. While they bicker over who gets to be on top, Mills runs around searching for the guy’s toes.

Back at the house Mills is taking Boden’s blood pressure and the Chief is giving Mills his going away pep talk. “Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it,” he says and Mills looks at him like the Chief has lost it.

Back in the ambulance, Shay is driving along, sipping her soda, when Dawson asks if they can clear the air. Shay shoots back that there’s nothing to clear she’s totally over it. She’s absolutely not having flashbacks in which she sees Darryl’s face and hears the gun go off every time she closes her eyes. Every call isn’t terrifying because she’s worried that she’s going to be triggered, that she’s going to see those last seconds when Darryl pointed the gun at his head and squeezed. No, she’s totally fine. A chick driving a convertible cuts them off and Shay chases her down and throws her drink all over her. Yes, totally over it.

Shay and Dawson park the rig and Dawson stomps off while Shay heads to the closet to hang up her coat. Clarke follows her in and starts talking. She resists listening to him but agrees to give him a minute. He tells her about a friend, Gil, who was a lot like her. Funny, goofy, always cracking jokes. When they came back from the war Gil’s mom asked Clarke to look after her son. He tried but one day got a text and raced to Gil’s house and was too late. He knows what Shay saw when Darryl shot himself. He tells her that it’s easy to burn herself out worrying about it, carrying that weight around. Shay’s face shifts as he talks and you can see the hurt in her face and in the way she slumps as he walks out. It’s a quiet scene. Clarke nails his application to be Shay’s lezbro. You can stay, dude.

Spellman finds two more transfer applications taped to his locker. After confronting Mills, Spellman storms out. Mouch presents him with another form and asks him to leave. Everyone else hands him one too. It’s like the opposite of the scene in Rudy when all the players ask to give up their spots so Rudy can play. Spellman appeals to Casey and Severide to lead their men, but they just hold up forms too.

Spellman storms in and tries to threaten Boden but Boden just hands him another form. Cool as the other side of the pillow, the Chief says, “Say hi to McLeod for me.” Boden is badass, y’all.

Severide and Zoya are making sweet hetero love. She’s wearing a tank top, as you do. I’m guessing, this isn’t my area of expertise. I’m just going to throw something out there. Boys do you not know that there are boobs under there? Anyway, she tells him she’s a little sad because she has to go back to Russia. Severide, take a tip from Shay and mystery hottie, maybe if you worked your game out without the shirt/bra boob barrier these ladies would stop leaving you for Europe? Just a theory.

Downstairs, Otis is throwing a legen-wait for it-dary Jenga party with Mouch, Cruz, and Shay. Shay’s face tells you everything you need to know about the lameness. As soon as Severide and Zoya appear, Cruz runs away, and Shay takes the opportunity to go to bed. Nice party David Silver, way to go.

Across town, Mills is making out with Isabella and things are about to get more interesting until he calls her Gaby. Dude, get your head out of your ass. Meanwhile, Gaby Herrmann and Otis are licking their wounds over how little money they are making. Arthur shows up with Jay to collect his money. He tells them that Game Day wouldn’t be killing them if they had made him a partner. They promise to have all his money by Friday and he smiles and then throws a chair through the glass display case. Jay just smiles in the background while Dawson’s chest heaves as she tries to calm down from having glass in her hair. Herrmann starts ranting about having a gun behind the bar when Dawson gets a call from useless Jay and goes skipping out to meet him. He says they don’t have enough to take Arthur down and that it was”killing him” not to defend her. Whatever dude, you’re lame and Dawson deserves better.

Casey visits Heather and prison and tries to buck her up with talk of her kids and getting her moved to a different prison. She doesn’t look so good, she needs to spend more time in the library with Taystee and Poussey. At the house, Zoya rns up to Severide and tells him there’s a way she can stay, they just have to get married. Whoa, hold up lady. He may live with Shay but he leaves the U-Hauling to the experts.

McLeod is waiting in her standard issue, Slytherin green coat to talk to Benny. They walk along the waterfront and talk about her plans for 51. She wants to save it but she needs someone she can trust running the place. Someone like Benny. Benny was the only one who didn’t see that coming. How long before these two are role playing Umbridge and Percy Weasley?

Everyone gets their physical results back and Herrmann is so excited by his score he takes his shirt off. Mills rushes off to tell the Chief about his results. Boden has an elevated level in his blood that is an indicator of asbestos poisoning. Mills starts talking about tests the Chief needs and specialists but Boden cuts him off and tells him to leave the report on the desk. Mills complies and leaves Boden to ponder his mortality.

Shay is drinking wine and listening to Amy tell some lesbians about interest rates. When Shay makes a move for more wine, Amy covers the mouth of the glass. Amy, let’s leave the controlling bullshit to the likes of Bette Porter, okay? You don’t have the swagger to pull it off. Amy and her friends crack that they should hide the silverware because Devin has arrived. They call her Devin-eleven because she’s open 24/7. Shay looks around and what do you know? It’s Sexytimes McGee from the bar. Shay wanders away from boring Amy and just happens to run into Devin. They take it to the side alley.

Then they go back to Shay’s apartment and have lots of sex on screen. Oh wait, no. Casey is playing a rousing, and equally interesting (NOPE!) game of Risk with the Darden boys. You’re killing me, Smalls! Casey, the only guy who can cockblock a lesbian from half a city away. Anyway, Griffin wants to come back to the firehouse. Hooray! I’m so glad we missed lesbian sexy times for this.

At Molly’s, Herrmann has a plan for security. An expensive plan. Otis suggests selling the bar. Cruz flirts with Zoya and does everything but say he’ll marry her so she can stay. Idiot. A second later they hear an alarm and run out to see Game Day up in flames. While everyone rushes out, Dawson, Cruz, Herrmann, and Otis run toward it.

In McLeod’s office the Chief shows up and says he’ll do anything to save 51. He hands in his resignation. Benny and Kelly are sitting outside having a beer when Benny drops the bomb that he’s taking over 51. Severide looks shocked and then gets up and walks away. What the fuck, pop?

We’ve got three weeks before the next episode, so there’s plenty of time to process. What did you think of this week’s episode?

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