Since Sammie got the hell out of dodge, the villain quota on Venice: The Series is running low. Thankfully, with the arrival of Ani’s brother Jake, I think the scales may once again be balanced. Episode Three begins with a throwback to the previous episode. Jake is strolling down the street when he sees a pretty lady, acting shady. The lady is Lara and she is trying to dispose of some empty vodka bottles on the DL. Jake takes notice of her assets, and then the trash. He walks up to Ani’s abode and starts banging on the doors, siding, whatever. Lara answers before he has a chance to toss a garden gnome through the window. They exchange pleasantries and Marvin Gaye lyrics, and Jake invites himself in, like a world-class creeper.
Gina is alone and bereft on the beach, one of Owen’s shirts in her hands. She flashes back to earlier when Ani tried to comfort her at Owen’s apartment. And by comfort, I mean make out with. Ani quickly checks herself, and apologizes for taking advantage of Gina’s grief. Considering the kiss was the one bright spot in Gina’s life as of late, she lets the matter go. Back on the beach, NPR Richard walks up to Gina and attempts to apologize. The thing is NPR Richard, it’s technically not an apology if you’re not sorry.
He explains to Gina how he always wanted kids, and now with Sara in his life, this is his chance to be a dad. Gina says that’s fantastic, but she wants to be left out of it. NPR Richard must have sand in his ears because he keeps pushing at Gina to meet their daughter. He tells Gina she wants to get to know them both, and that she and her daughter have a lot in common. Like they are both creative, are kind to animals, oh, and huge lesbians. (Somewhere in the distance a record scratches, a waiter drops a tray full of dishes, and a car drives into a fire hydrant.)
Jake and Lara stand around the kitchen, awkwardly talking and waiting for Ani. Jake starts in on a diatribe about Gina, and Lara’s ears perk up. Someone who dislikes Gina as much as she does? A score for Team Lara, although I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t want Jake on my team if I were her. He calls Ani “Marshmallow” which is a much better nickname than what my brother calls me. Lara tells him about the engagement and he seems to be tickled pink. Ani shows up, bearing roses of guilt and is shocked as hell to see her bro, standing in her kitchen. Jake asks them when the wedding is and Ani and Lara seem to differ on the timing.
Lara would pretty much Chapel of Love it, right now. Ani would prefer to wait, like, indefinitely. Jake invites the girls out for dinner and celebratory champagne, but Ani tells him that Lara doesn’t drink. His hamster wheel turns and someone has some ammo to stick in his back pocket. They agree to meet at Malbec later on. Ani presents Lara with the flowers and thanks her for putting up with her. Lara says it should be the other way around. I think they are both right. Then Ani kisses Lara with her Gina kissing lips. Sigh. Lesbians.
Gina is pretty flabbergasted to learn that her daughter is gay, but wonders how this will change anything. NPR Richard thinks that perhaps Gina could pass on some of the ancient, lesbian secrets that you can only find deep inside a mountain in the Isle of Lesbos, or the after hours bar at Dinah Shore. He presses her to come with him to meet up with Sara and The Colonel. Gina is none too happy that The Colonel knows about Sara, but before she has a chance to bury NPR Richard in the sands of Venice Beach, she gets a phone call. The police have info on Sammie, and Gina bolts out of there.
At Case del Colonel, Sara and The Colonel are chatting about Owen and how acting isn’t a real job. (My musical theatre degree would beg to differ sir…or rather, wishes it could.) Sara is a painter, so she isn’t having any of Grandpa’s guff. The Colonel gets the same call Gina did, and tells Sara to stay at his place while he goes to meet up with Gina, Guya and Brandon.
Brandon tries to hint at Van’s possible involvement with Sammie, but Guya doesn’t let him get a word in. He tells the family that they found Sammie’s fingerprints on the murder weapon and they are hot on her tail. Gina offers to strangle Sammie herself, but it’s vetoed.
Guya’s son Van chases Adrienne down the stairs. She’s tired of his shit, and she wants to get out of town before the heat turns up on either of them. Adrienne tells Van to get a life and takes the first bus to Pine Valley. Van shows up at Guya’s and Gina is drowning her sorrows. It’s tense and Van breaks the ice by telling Gina to slug him for being an asshole to Owen before he died. She declines.
Lara and Ani show up at Malbec, and Jamie greets them. Lara is wearing some sort of corset/suit combo, and it’s pretty amazing. He leads them to a back room where, SURPRISE, Jake has thrown them an engagement party. The couple look in shock at the people gathered.
Lara is handed a glass of champagne but she just holds it, while Ani looks on and Jake stares her down.
What did you think of this week’s Venice: The Series?