YOU GUYS, PAM IS ALIVE. YOU CAN STOP PANICKING. WHAT? ONLY I WAS PANICKING? Well, in my defense, years of TV watching have taught me to maintain an attitude of constant vigilance when it comes to gay characters. Also, I invite you to look at the comments sections of other recaps in which lesbians have died and tell me if you would not, in my position, be a little paranoid.
Anyway, the episode opens with Sookie’s dad (possessing Lafayette) trying to drown her in a creek. As if that were the cliffhanger everyone cared about. As if you could fool us into thinking for one minute that Sookie’s cavalcade of bad decisions might actually lead to her death.
Of course, Bill feels her danger and sends Warlow the day-walker to rescue her. And I am just so fed up with it. Maybe I’ve been spoiled by Pretty Little Liars, but I expect, if not exclusive lady rescues, than at least rescue parity between my male and female leads. Once Sookie is as safe as she ever is, Papa Stackhouse goes back to heaven or wherever, and Bill calls Warlow to come home for some more sexual tension. But Sookie wants Warlow all to herself, so she whisks him off to a magical faerie plane called Instagram, safe from Bill and the harsh, unfiltered light of reason.