Best. Lesbian. Week. Ever. (June 22, 2007)

WE DON’T NEED ANOTHER HERO (UNLESS, OF COURSE, SHE’S A LESBIAN CHEERLEADER)

Last month, Malinda blogged about the new teen lesbian cheerleader character who would be joining the cast of Heroes in its second season. She was good enough to even make a few casting recommendations for the part (I too was hoping for Mandy Musgrave, but only if she could still keep up with her homework over at South of Nowhere.) Alas, NBC totally went around Malinda and announced this week that the role will be played by Lyndsy Fonseca.

You may know her from the HBO polygamy drama Big Love or her appearances on CSI, House M.D. and The Young and the Restless. Fonsenca’s character, April, is described by The Hollywood Reporter as "beautiful" and "sweet."

In related news, the hateful, blackmailing lesbian cheerleader from Veronica Mars has just announced plans to kick April’s ass in the locker room after school today.

BEST. REALITY TV SHOW. EVER.

Automatically zoom past all of those lame reality dating shows (The Bachelor, Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire, Who Wants to Marry My Dad, Beauty and the Geek — well, I kinda like that one) because you just can’t relate? Well, get prepared to spend some quality time with your TiVo. Casting has begun for a new reality series, Venus Envy (working title), which aims to couple some lucky lesbian with a "fresh out of the closet Maxim model."

The casting notice reads as follows:

Seeking gorgeous lesbians 21 years and older for
an outrageous
new series. Finally meet a girl who’s not your ex’s ex!!
We’re casting now, and in order to be considered, you need to convince
us that you’ve got
what it takes.
This will be an outrageous summer romantic adventure set in a
spectacular mansion in Hollywood.
Prepare to live, love, laugh, party and be part of a defining moment
in television history
for our community … I mean really, can you plan a better summer than this?
You’re moving in for up to 6 weeks but leave the U-Haul behind.
Are you rad enough to win the heart of our super model? Prove it!

Where do I — I mean you — sign up? Go to the official website, www.venusenvycasting.com, and tell them all about how gorgeous and, most importantly, rad you really are. And while you’re at it, you’ll also need to tell them about your friends, your clubbing habits, your "wildest" date, your tattoos and your history with restraining orders — all while listening to the subtle strains of that tender paean to true romance, "Love to Love You, Baby."

Meanwhile, I’m going to try to expose (heh) the secret identity of the "fresh out of the closet" model in question. If she looks anything like the already out model Amanda Moore, then I predict a stampede of applicants.

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