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“Chicago Fire ” recap (1.14): “Posing for a Calendar?”

Previously on Chicago Fire, Dawson’s big brother started to resemble a Cullen before he got himself shot, Clarice gave birth to a baby boy and their first baby present was a petition for custody from Clarice’s husband. Dude, next time, stick to the registry. Severide tried to contact Renee the First and Casey’s mom has got it going on but her parole is really cramping her dating style. We pick up where we left off last episode with Dawson weeping over her brother who has been shot in the hospital parking lot. She spots an ambulance, puts on her speedy sneakers, and jumps in front of it. Ladies, for the love of my heart health, one of you already got hit by a truck, can we not jump in front of another? Thanks. They help her get Antonio into the hospital. For the first time in the history of the show a doctor acts like a doctor and tells Dawson she can’t come hang out in the OR while they fix her brother. What does she think this is, Grey’s Anatomy? The nurse walks into the room of unconfirmed parental rights and hands the baby to Severide whom she mistakes for the kid’s dad. He’s awkward at first, he tries to put the nurse off before giving in and holding the baby. Shay and Clarice watch from the back but the baby works its magic on Severide and you can see the smile on his face inching wider, matching the way that baby is cracking open his heart, bit by bit. Shay gets a message from Dawson and rushes downstairs to see what happened. This is why medical shows work so well, there can be 47 different kinds of crises happening at once and all in the same building. It’s one-stop drama shopping. Shay asks what happened and when Dawson can’t answer because her mouth won’t open to do anything but weep, she whispers “Awww, baby,” and shippers cast off and set sail. This is the most un-Dawson we’ve seen her, I think. She’s covered in blood, which isn’t new but it’s jarring because it’s her brother’s blood, and its on her fancy coat (which someone rightly pointed out is the same one Spencer wore on PLL) rather than her uniform. She’s like Vivian in Pretty Woman; she can’t deal with this shit when she’s not wearing her gear.

Casey returns to his house to find that his mom has made him breakfast and is ready to try to make nice. I like what the writers are doing, turning their relationship on its side, with Casey acting like the parent and the mom acting like a teenager. But teenager are the worst, so it’s hard to listen to Mama Casey be petulant and self-centered. They talk about how they have to be able to trust each other and because he’s kind of a dick (but not wrong for wanting to know) Casey flat out asks his mom why he killed his dad. I hereby nominate questions about why someone committed murder, or any other crime, for the Mount Rushmore of things you don’t talk about in polite company (joining religion, politics, and a woman’s age, obviously). Casey’s mom get mad, slams her giant coffee mug on the table (I could take a bath in that thing) and storms off in a huff and a cloud of “You always want to talk about how I murdered your dad, JEEZ!”

Mills is standing around with Dawson while Shay lingers off to the side. There’s something very familiar about this scene for the lesbians among us. Mills thinks that he and Dawson are in the closet. When he makes an awkward move toward her and freezes, Dawson nods to Shay and tells him “It’s fine, she knows.” Hey Mills, it gets better buddy. Some of us also had to keep score of who knew about us and our relationships. It’s hard, but think of it as the closeted lesbian’s secret weapon against Alzheimer’s, built-in mental gymnastics. Because even though they are dating other people, Shawson is a real thing, Shay is going to go with Dawson to the hospital after their shift. No word from Mills whether he’ll go or not. He just springs away from Dawson at the sight of Casey, like I used to do back in the day. “What? No, we weren’t holding hands, what are you talking about?”

Dawson gets called into Chief Boden’s office to talk to a cop. He tries to tell her that her brother was going off the rails but this clown hasn’t met Gabriela “rules are for other people” Dawson. She straightens her spine, willing every last millimeter of height from it and looks the detective in the eye and tells him that her brother got shot and she doesn’t know him from a hole in the wall so why would she talk to him. He storms off because if there’s one thing he can’t stand it’s tiny women who hand him his ass. She promises the Chief she doesn’t know anything about what her brother was up to beyond the little he told her before getting shot. The Chief sizes her up and appears to believe her but honestly, after the crap she’s pulled, he probably never knows if she’s lying or not.

Severide is playing Angry Birds on his phone in the locker room when Eric Whaley walks in. Whaley hands Severide a peace offering/bribe of a key chain he got for opening a savings account (dude, go get the OED and look up bribe). He apologizes for being horrible to Severide and then asks him to help track down his sister. Severide pushes back. He says “From the first day you walked into your house, you treated me like a hired hand! The one night you get drunk, I’m supposed to roll over and thank my lucky stars? I’m sorry, I don’t downshift that fast!” But he grudgingly takes Renee’s number, or the digits her brother think belong to her. In the house, Herrmann has a book for Shay on babies. It’s brand new and he tells her how great it is and how it’s got everything she needs to know. Without skipping a beat she thumbs through it and asks if it covers sleep training, he says he’s doesn’t know, he never read the thing.

They are called out to help a kid who has fallen into Lake Michigan. The kid’s dad is standing there screaming that his son went in the water, came up once and then disappeared. Severide is in the water in a flash and pulls the kid out of the freezing water. Shay’s face betrays the swirl of emotions she’s feeling. In the ambulance she pleads “Come on, Patrick” quietly as they work on the kid. Her face twisted in agony as she imagines her own baby on the stretcher, tubes coming from his mouth. By some miracle the kid comes back, he starts breathing, his blood pressure comes up, and he’s going to be fine. While Shay is filling out paperwork, Severide ambles up to her and she tells him the good news, the kid is going to be fine. He’s relieved and surprised. The boy’s father comes up behind Severide and thanks him for saving his son. The father is teetering on the brink of total breakdown. He spits words from his mouth hoping that as he says them they will make sense. He can’t understand why he froze when his son needed him. He can’t fathom how he could fail to act, how he could have stood on dry land while his son fought to stay afloat in the frigid water. The father is floundering, trying to find purchase with his thoughts, but each time he reaches out for something to grab, he dips under again. Severide holds out a lifeline to this poor man. He tells him that the father might have drowned too and then he wouldn’t be there for his son now, when he needs him. The father grabs desperately for Severide’s rescue. He wants to believe that he wasn’t a coward, that he didn’t choke in a moment he’ll never get back.

There can’t be a worse fear than losing a child. Watching your child in trouble, the real trouble that means life or death for a person you love more than yourself, and failing to act to save him is a glimpse into a twisted fun house Mirror of Erised that shows only our deepest fear. We know our kids will get hurt. We agonize over it but we always hope we’ll be there to help, to put a band-aid on it, to kiss it and make it better, to fight the demons that are too large. We want to be heroes for our kids, but more than that we want them to be safe. Looking into that mirror and seeing only the gruesome reality that you did nothing in that moment is enough to drive anyone mad. We hope that in the moment our kid needs us, truly needs us, we’ll all be Gryffindors. We dream that we’ll find that courage even if we go back to our everyday lives as Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs the next day. We all want to be Lily and James, standing in front of our child’s crib, facing evil, facing death and doing everything we can to protect our baby. But we can’t all be Lily and James, we can’t all be the Longbottoms. We can’t all find that well of courage when we need it. We know this, we know there is a chance we will fall short in the moment that matters most, and it is haunting. Severide helping the father to let himself off the hook is an act of generosity and grace without which this man may be tortured for the rest of his life.

Herrmann and Otis are meeting with their silent partner and the guy is silently requesting that he be given a quarter stake in the bar in spite of not putting in any cash. This sticks in Herrmann’s craw and so he tells the mob muscle guy that they would think about it depending on what the big guy brings to the table. I’m pretty sure Herrmann’s going to be at the bottom of Lake Michigan before the episode is done. Hold onto your ovaries we have beautiful women, a baby, and really good lighting. Shay and Clarice are lying on the floor in sleeping bags with the baby to be named later between them. They are cooing at the little guy and he’s as awake as all babies get just when you want them to sleep. They chat about the whole custody issue with Daniel the husband. Clarice wonders if he’ll try to use her time in therapy and use of anti-depressants against her. Then she figures they can just offer him 50/50 custody and everything will be totes fine. Shay’s not thrilled with Daniel and his mangy beard but since she has no say in the matter she’s nods and figures, “This lady hasn’t broken my heart 12 dozen times, so this will probably be fine too.”

Dawson is at the hospital talking to Antonio and her spidey sense tells her that everyone is in danger because her brother decided to take on a gang and got shot. She missed her calling as a detective. She decides to find a way to end it and she’s will to talk to Detective Lucifer Voight. Ugh, he’s the same cartoon villain with his over-the-top menacing and shit-eating grin. Anyway, Dawson is ready to trade favors with the guy so he gives her a name and tells her that this guy will find her someone willing to testify against the people who shot Antonio. We all know it’s a bad move for Dawson but thinking with her head seems to be an issue for her, so off she goes with her gut and we’ll just have to cover our eyes. The bar is getting inspected and there are problems they never anticipated because the former owner never had an issue. He also had an “understanding” with the inspector. Otis does the most ham-handed job of trying to bribe the inspector and Herrmann looks like he might cry. Severide’s channeling his inner papa and holding Shay junior and reading the parenting book. Shay asks “Are you posing for a calendar?” Shay looks over his shoulder and says “Thank god he looks like Clarice.” Those who have seen Shiri Appleby and the guy who plays her husband will agree that is an excellent choice. Good job random gene selection! Severide tells Shay about Whaley’s request to find Renee the First. He asks if the lawyer they have for the custody case is any good at finding missing people. He’s not sure he wants to find her or if he can help her at all. Shay, ever the voice if this show’s conscience points out that he went out of his way to help a stranger at the hospital but he doesn’t want to help the woman the almost married? She has a point, Kelly.

Got your eyes covered? Good because this part is about as scary as I can handle. Dawson is alone (stupid!) at a creepy building with a long, dark, hallway leading to a bunch of closed doors and a lady not dressed for church standing outside of one. In a blink, Dawson is face down on the floor with a gun to her head and a faceless man asking her what the hell she’s doing there. Really, what ARE you doing there Gaby. She talks fast, drops Voight’s name, and promises never to come back. The bad guy lets her live.

Severide walks into a club that looks nice enough until you notice the pole on stage. He finds Renee who is sitting in her lacy undies and a shortie robe, talking to a man who is, shall we say, not as attractive as she is. She’s surprised to see him and then her face hardens into the wall we all use when our ex-fiance finds us in our skivvies in a strip club. She insists she’s fine so vehemently that even Severide understands it must be opposite day. Dawson’s back in the principal’s office. The Chief got a call about her trip to see Voight and he warns her about Voight and then tells her that gossip can be tough and maybe she should consider telling Casey about her deal with his would be murderer before he hears it from Mouch. She finds Casey and he does his Casey thing when she tells him. He stomps, he points his finger, and makes an angry face. She tells him “Sometimes you have to dance with the devil.” He’s not comforted by this image. “You mean to tell me you’re sleeping with Mills, having a semi-platonic love-friendship thing with Shay, and now you’re dancing with the devil?”

Severide talks to Whaley and lies about how Renee is doing. He leaves Whaley with the impression his sister is fine and maybe she’s a cocktail waitress. Oh Kelly, when will you learn protecting Renee by lying to her family is not ever going to work for you?

Otis and Herrmann and in the garage bay talking to silent partner and the inspector. The inspector tells them that the bar has passed inspection. Otis offers a toast and the inspector declines as he limps over to deliver the papers. Silent partner downs the alcohol and insists that he’s worth twenty-five percent for his “intangibles.” Herrmann looks as nervous as a guy his size should look staring down a guy like that. Mills and Dawson are chatting in the locker room, which feels like cheating because that was sort of her place with Casey, oh wait I don’t give a crap about Casey. Can we please stop making Monica Raymund cry? I know she’s pretty amazing at it, but honestly it’s just too sad. Before they can get anywhere they are all called out again. This time a house partially collapsed when the upstairs neighbor’s floor collapsed under the weight of hoarding. A girl and her boyfriend are trapped in the basement make-out room but come out of it fine in the end because only bad things happen to Shawson on this show. Herrmann quips that the girl is ok, “Just got banged around a little.” Nice double entendre, Herrmann!

A girl shows up to talk to Dawson. She knows everything and will talk if they can guarantee her safety. Dawson promises her the moon and stars so she’s ready to talk. Hooray! If only every case could be solved so easily.

Herrmann finds the silent partner and calls him a bully. He says if the guy wants to beat him up go for it, and here’s a tire iron if you need it. He tells the guy to take or leave one percent of the bar profit. The guy takes it because free money is never bad.

There’s a quick scene with Shay, Clarice and Severide. This is the most ridiculous scene in the history of the show. Severide is putting together the crib. Dude, you don’t get between a lesbian and her IKEA. We are born with an allen wrench in our hands and the ability to assemble furniture. Clarice comments that she knows that baby Wesley will have a good man in his life. This scene ends with Severide getting a call from Whaley telling him that Renee took a bunch of pills and in in the hospital. Maybe she wasn’t so good after all. Now, I know some people are getting a little riled up about all the talk about seeing Severide as a father in some of these scenes. Honestly, I thought Clarice was making a dig at her husband with this comment, asserting that Daniel is not a good man but that with Severide around the baby will have a good guy in his corner.

I hate any implication that these two ladies need a man to help them raise this kid. But I also think this episode was much more about trying to show Severide’s growth from a selfish man to one who, like a good father, is looking out for others. He helped save the kid from drowning but also helped the kid’s father deal with not jumping to save the boy. He reached out to Renee, which is something he would not have done earlier this season, he seemed to forgive Whaley instead of having a meathead pissing match. Any attempt to show Shay and Clarice as being insufficient parents on their own would rile me up too, but I don’t think that’s what the show is doing here.

Hell, the last scene between Casey and his mom was the over the top, hit you over the head with it, demonstration of the lengths parents go to help their children. She and Casey fight. She starts giving the most ridiculous speech about how she didn’t mean to be out past curfew but that the guy’s car broke down on the highway and how they had to get towed. It’s the song and dance we have heard from every teen in the history of television. But Casey’s gone all honey badger and he don’t give a shit anymore. He kicks his mom out, tells her to to pack up and be out in two weeks. She launches a last-ditch effort to stay and tells him why she killed his father. Papa Casey was horrid to her, chiseling away at her self worth for years. She fought back but then he started to do it to Matt. The night he died he called her up and began the familiar barrage of insults, she told him to stop it. He moved on and said something cruel and unforgivable about Matt (we don’t know what he actually said) and she snapped. She took the gun, and the key to his house, and drove across town so that he could not do to her son what he had done to her. She killed her husband to protect her son. I think that Mama Casey is manipulative, I think she lies when it suits her, and I think she’s doing everything she can to cling to her son. I don’t like this revelation, partly because I think it unfairly shifts some of the blame for the murder to Casey. But it might be a truth that Casey deals with for a long time.

So the scenes from the next episode show Shay getting a needle-stick story line and an HIV scare. Not to jump to crazy town but haven’t the writers given Shay enough shit to deal with lately? Have they forgotten they hit her with a damn truck a few weeks ago? I am taking it as a sign they know Shay is the best damn character they have and they are trying to keep her in the center of the drama. We’ll have to wait until next week to find out.

Here are a few of your #ShaycagoFire tweets. I loved them. They cracked me the hell up this morning when I read them all. Thank you.

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