“Chicago Fire” recap (1.3): “Everyone benefits from me having a toned ass”

Previously on Chicago Fire we learned that Shay can pull with the ladies, Dawson loves Joey Casey and wants to be a doctor. Casey loves Hallie, who is already a doctor, and Severide is more bark than bite. I have to say this episode was a huge improvement over the prior ones. The different stories meshed better and came together in ways that they haven’t in the first two episodes.

The episode opens with Peter Mills jinxing the crew as it was throwing a no-hitter of a shift. They are called to the scene of a two car accident. One car is perched on top of a barrier, upside down and the crew has to rush to keep the car from going over the edge. Our hero, Lt. Casey, checks the driver of the other car and smells alcohol on his breath and sees several crushed beer cans on the front seat. He tells the police officer on the scene to check the kid for alcohol and by the time Casey returns from saving the father and son in the other car the driver is gone along with the open containers. The cop tells Casey that the driver is the son of Detective Voigt. Det. Voigt is on the scene and is already creeping me out.

At Chez Shay-Severide the next morning Shay tries to talk to Severide about his shoulder. She noticed that it kept him from using one of the heavy tools at the accident scene the night before and she asks him when he’s going to have it checked out. He’s like “Oh yeah, I’m definitely, maybe, sometime going to see a medical professional about the shoulder I’ve been shooting up with painkillers. I have an appointment on the second Tuesday after never.”

Casey comes up to the ladies and Shay cracks that either they are in trouble or he wants something. Dawson likes the idea that maybe he wants something because she loves a man in a tucked polo. Shay bounces and allows Dawson to chat with her crush.

Casey asks if Dawson can call her brother who works on the vice squad and they exchange some cute banter about Casey’s band of hookers getting in trouble. Casey asks Antonio about Voigt and we learn that Voigt is, shockingly, a dirty cop and the wrong guy to mess with. I mean, how fun would it be if Voigt was just a really nice guy who would be totally fine with his kid getting busted for drunk driving, right?


You don’t need to be a cop to see that you loooove him

Big brother Antonio catches the way Dawson is being ridiculously obvious about having a major crush on Casey and she tells him that they aren’t dating and that Casey is taken. Sad face.

The secondary story this week is about the squad needing a new television, preferably in time to watch Da Bears play that weekend. Mills is given the task of figuring out how to get the money. Apparently all of the money they had before was spent on an elliptical machine to keep Shay’s butt toned. Shay cracks that everyone benefits from her having a toned ass and not one lesbian is going to contradict that statement.

One of Mills’ brilliant ideas is selling T-shirts. He thought about selling magazine subscriptions or candy like you do in middle school but remembers that everyone just had their parents buy the stuff because no one wants off-brand candy bars the size of Kansas. When no one thinks selling shirts is a good plan, Mills suggests getting Nikki to sit out front and sell them. Shay cracks that maybe they should just put her in a bikini. The guys like the idea until they realize she’s being sarcastic and look suitably contrite. Leslie Shay, standing up for the honor of ladies everywhere.

Hallie comes to the fire station with lunch for Casey. She and Dawson say hi and Dawson tries to keep the “I want to have all the sex with your fiancé” from being too obvious. The idea of a resident having time for an off-site lunch is only the second most ridiculous thing about this interaction when she proceeds to break every HIPAA regulation and tell Casey that the son from the accident is paralyzed and will never walk again. Casey mulls it over with a broody stare.

Candidate Peter Mills pops into the bathroom to wash his hands and get his flirt on with Dawson. He’s just completed the down fire fighter drill in record time or something. I’m totally distracted by Dawson’s, um, T-shirt. But she flirts back, telling him not to get too cocky. I like the kid and frankly, if Dawson isn’t going to be making out with Shay any time soon, I think Mills is a better bet than Casey. So hooray for Millson or Dawls or whatever we’re calling them.


Usually I reserve this smile for my paramedic partner or for unavailable men

Dirty Pop (what? I can’t be the only N’Sync fan can I?) sends over a ridiculously large, flat-screen, television and the guys hop around like kids on Christmas morning until Casey sends it back with his sternest stern face. The refusal of a free television makes the Chief notice that maybe something fishy is going on and gets involved.

The crew is called to a suicide jumper who has impaled himself on a fence. This part was gross but I am mentioning it because once again Severide can’t hack it with his sore shoulder and after they wheel impaled guy into the hospital Shay finds her doctor buddy and fellow Sapphic Sister to ask for a favor.

The dad who was in the accident comes in with a cake shaped knife to twist in Casey and says that his son has a long road ahead of him. I mean, come on, a cake?


Here’s some cake in case you weren’t feeling guilty enough for not filing that report

Then he really puts it to them when he says the police report says that he ran a red light and caused the accident. Not that Casey really needed any more incentive to do the right thing but he fills out the paper work with what actually happened not that we had any doubt that Casey would do the right thing.

Nikki, who has been chasing Severide’s ass all episode, finally gets what she wanted in the equipment room with her dad waiting to take her home. She’s all, “leave your helmet on” to Severide and who is he to refuse a naked lady? Afterwards, Shay finds Severide and he’s jumpy and defensive about getting frisky with Nikki but Shay could care less. She calls him on lying to her to get pain meds and tells him he has an appointment with her doctor buddy after his shift is done. It will totally be off the books and no one will know except for the three of them. Right, because you can totally keep secrets in a hospital.


We lesbians laugh in the face of medical regulations, which is why I have been giving you pain meds illegally

Severide learns that his shoulder is really a cracked vertebra and that he needs surgery and six months to a year to recover. Shay asks him about it the next day and he tries to pass it off like he’s fine but he did not count on the divine secrets of the va-jay-jay sisterhood and Shay already knows. Obviously when you’re off the books already what’s a little HIPAA violation between friends, right? He gets all pissy about only loving being a firefighter and stomps around about eating his pain until Nikki’s dad arrives to tell Severide to back off because Nikki’s engaged. Dad mistakes Shay, in her lovely sleepwear, for another Severide tryst which is funny and Shay makes a funny face.

Creepy cop shows up and takes Casey for a drink and tries to intimidate him into changing his statement. Copper clearly isn’t used to being told no and gets all ragey and is about to make a serious threat when Chief Boden shows up, cool as a cucumber in January, and sits down so he can hear anything Det. Creepy says. The cop storms out and our hero is triumphant.


It’s Boden, Bitch

Casey and Dawson chat in the locker room. Can we take a moment, again, to thank the lesbian goddess of t-shirts and tank tops for Dawson’s attire?


I make this look gooood.

Great. So Dawson says, “I thought about it and I would do the right thing because I wouldn’t want to have to look you, Casey, the man that I love so much it’s obvious to everyone, in the eye and know I lied.” He’s a little surprised by the sentiment because he’s the only one in the tri-state area who doesn’t know she’s in love with him. Idiot.

Instead of using the t-shirt money to buy a television, the team makes the longest wheelchair ramp in the history of the universe for the accident victim. Seriously, that thing could be at an amusement park.


You must be at least four feet tall to ride this ride

Afterward they all head to Mills’ family restaurant to watch the game. Mills has told his mom he’s done working there because he wants to be a firefighter. She worries because her husband was killed in the line of duty but Casey promises to look after Mills, because that’s the sort of heroic big brother Casey is. I’m hoping that Mills’ hot little sister will take a shine to Shay so the paramedics can double date and share notes on the Mills’ skills. As they sit and drink beer and watch the game, Det. Creepy does a slow drive-by of the restaurant and stares down Casey. I guess this isn’t quite over.


With my mind on my money and my money on my mind

What did you think? Do you agree that this episode was better than the first two?

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