“True Blood” Episode 411 Recap: “Soul of Fire”

 
 

Then Mantonia starts hugging herself and muttering, crazy-lady-on-the-subway style. Then she barfs, or as Lafayette explains to Tara and friends, she just “puked a bitch out.” Heh. Best Lafayette Line Ever.

Turns out that Lafayette can see Antonia leaving Marnie’s body, on account of having gnarly medium powers, but nobody other than he and Jesus can. So Lafayette and Jesus narrate for the others what’s happening in the struggle between Marnie and Antonia, just like sportscasters at a big game. Or at least, like how I’d imagine sportscasters speak, but I’m not sure on account of never having watched an actual sporting event in my life.

If I understand it correctly, the job of sportscasters is basically repeating exactly what’s happening right before our eyes just so all the drunken, bleary-eyed bozos watching the game can settle their gambling debts once they come off their benders, right? Well, that’s what Lafayette and Jesus do for the hostage-witches and for us all at home.

Jesus helpfully explains that Antonia’s left Marnie’s body and they’re having a little lovers’ tiff. We see Antonia tell Marnie that she’s killing innocent civilians now and she wants no part of her plans any more. Then, as Jesus reports, Marnie starts casting a binding spell to force Antonia back inside her.

Lafayette follows up and reports that Marnie just sucked Antonia back inside her. I’m not sure what the technical term is for ingesting something you just puked out back in, but I’m going with “down chuck” (as in the opposite of “up” chuck.). So Marnie down chucks Antonia and then grins like the cat who down chucked the canary.

Jesus reports: “Marnie for the win.”

But then Jesus rushes to Casey’s body and is all, “Wow! I totally feel a pulse. Marnie, is it OK if I try to save her?” And Marnie says, “Of course! You’re a nurse! I never meant for her to die, do whatever you need to do.”

And Jesus is all, “Great! Let me bring the body and my closest ally who also happens to be my lover into this back room where we won’t plot against you or look for spare weapons – like, say, the very dagger that’s sticking out of her chest – without telling you about it first, okay?” And Marnie’s all, “Yeah, whatever. I’m sure I can totally trust all you people I’m holding hostage.”

So Jesus and Lafayette drag the body into the back room, and Lafayette’s all, “Jesus, I love you, but I’m starting to think you’re a crappy nurse. This chick is totally dead.” And Jesus admits he knows this. It was all a clever ruse! He thinks they can use their gnarly made-in-Mexico brujo powers along with Casey’s body to sever Antonia from Marnia and save the day.

Then he comes back out and tells Marnie he just needs a few odds and ends to “cauterize the wounds,” and she naturally lets him do it. So he starts grabbing jars off the shelves, with labels on them like, “Extra Strength Defeat Your Enemies Tablets” and Marnie is like, “Um, you really need this jar with the ‘Kill the Psycho Witch Holding You Hostage Powder,’ inside?” and Jesus is all, “Absolutely … it’s like Neosporin.” So once again she’s all, “Okay fine,” and totally lets him do whatever he wants. For a Big Bad, she’s incredibly, astonishingly stupid.

While Jesus and Lafayette are in the back room not doing anything at all she should be in any way worried about, Marnie has a little meet and greet with Holly and Sookie. They try to convince her that Marnie was always a sweetheart who would never advocate such violence. But Marnie is now clearly cuckoo for cocoa puff and barks that she was treated like a doormat and is giddy to finally be the one with all the power.

Sookie responds that she knows where Marnie’s coming from, on account of having been an outsider herself. She tries to impress upon Marnie that she has the power to stop all this, and incredibly, seems to get through as Marnie says she’d consider a negotiation.

Meanwhile, outside, Bill has dispatched with one of the Mantonia-controlled sheriffs and is about to off the second one. Before he can tear her to pieces, Pam leans in and grabs a necklace from the sheriff’s neck, pointing out that it’s vintage Cartier and she’ll be happy to care for it in her absence.

But rather than kill off one of his own again, Bill gets pissy and barks that Mantonia should come out and face him, rather than hide behind magic. This is just the point where, inside the shop, Marnie had agreed that she’d be open to negotiations, so she comes outside … but she insists on bringing Sookie with her.

When she and Sookie get outside, the sheriff Bill was holding under his foot starts responding to Mantonia’s powers and rises against him. So Bill kicks her like a soccer ball right into the force field that surrounds the shop, where she fries to a crisp right before their eyes.

Mantonia brags that her protection spell harnesses the power of the sun, making it instantly deadly to all vampires who touch it.

The sight of a distraught Sookie of course brings Bill and Eric to their knees (while Pam and Jessica roll their eyes) and they beg Mantonia to release her. Mantonia says she’ll be happy to release her, but first they have to do something for her. They’re all, “Anything! Just name it!” and she’s all, “Okay … eat a bug. No, wait! Make out with each other … No, wait! Obviously that’s something you both want. Um, okay. Kill yourselves.”

And they totally agree to it! Like without hesitation or trying to cut a deal or anything. Thye’re just like, “Sure, we’ll kill ourselves, no prob.” For two such allegedly badass vampires, this seems to me like a pretty wimpy way out. Bill’s all, “I’ll shoot Eric, then Pam will shoot me,” and if I were Eric, I’d be, “Hold it, stud. How’s about I shoot you and then Pam shoots me?” But he just goes right along with it.

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