“True Blood” Episode 410 Recap: “Burning Down the House”

 
 

 

CELEBRITY REHAB WITH DR. TERRY

 

Sheriff Andy wakes up from a V-induced bender to find Terry and Arlene on hand for an impromptu intervention.

They’ve got a capsule of V they found on Andy and are holding it up all accusingly. Arlene is particularly upset that he was doing this stuff around her babies. In my favorite line of the episode, Andy defends himself by saying that, like all high quality illegal drugs, it’s got a child protection cap on it. Like that could possibly stop a determined devil baby!

Terry doesn’t believe any of Andy’s lies or excuses and forces him into his own special version of rehab.

Terry’s unique, no doubt successful form of drug rehab involves: taking Andy out to the old treehouse fort they used to play in as kids, bickering over who had it worse as a child, having a shooting contest, and beating the crap out of each other. This is so going to be a reality show on OWN next year.

WTF Rating: 1

I love Terry and Andy as comic relief. But I don’t think there’s enough interest here to drive a more serious, lengthy storyline like they try to do here.

 

A FINE BROMANCE

Before Sookie enists his aid in the battle against the witches, you may remember that Jason was getting it on in the back of a pick-up parked on King Bill’s lawn.

Post-nookie, he’s got a serious case of the guilts, reminding Jessica that Hoyt is his BF and like a brother to him. She’s bored of the details about their little bromance, but he proceeds to recap the highlights, all about how Hoyt was a runt back in school who he had to keep bailing out of danger. But look! It did get better, because he grew up to bag a hot vampire girlfriend, even if she did dump him.

Jason feels all guilty and is worried that he’ll never be able to face Hoyt, and he begs Jessica to glamour him into forgetting what they did. Other than, “I think I might have crabs,” I’d imagine there are fewer things a woman would want to hear from a guy just after sex than, “God I wish I could forget all about you.” And she takes it just as you’d expect, by being supremely pissed off at Jason and ditching him.

Back at his place, Jason is sitting around moping, when he gets a visit from the one person in all of Bon Temps he’s most avoiding. It’s Hoyt, and he wants to do what every recently dumped person wants to do with their friends as I know from painful experience – get you drunk and try to trick you into saying horrible things about their ex so that when they inevitably get back together you’ll look like a total ass.

Hoyt shifts between talking about how Jessica is awful/awesome, then much to Jason’s horror, starts crying.

I know we’re usually carrying on with how amazing Ryan Kwanten looks without his shirt, and I think because of that we don’t always give him enough credit for his acting. But watch his face in this scene as he sits there listening to Hoyt – just listening, but you can see so many conflicted emotions playing out in his features. It really is brilliant.

Anyway, Jason can’t take this, so he goes running to Sookie asking if, since Hoyt is determined to crash at his place, can he now crash with her. She says sure, just so long as first he places his life in grave danger by helping her defeat an all-powerful 400-year-old dead witch. Which, compared to a drunk, wallowing Hoyt must seem like a piece of cake.

WTF Rating: 1

At some point, Hoyt is obviously going to find out about Jason and Jessica. And that is going to be too sad for words.

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