“Top Chef All-Stars” Recap (8.02): When dinosaurs attack

Joe and Padma come around to taste all their brown bags. The concoctions fall into three groups: sweet, savory and couldn’t decide between sweet and savory. The Jonas kid disliked Mike’s chocolate coconut balls, Tiffany’s rice pudding mush and Stephen’s cookie that wasn’t a cookie.

But he liked Spikes potato/carrot chips with dip and Tiffani’s chocolate Rice Krispie Treat/Moon Pie/Sno Ball threesome. To decide, they must make the snack for the 150 kids spending the night at the museum and let them pick who wins and gets immunity. Tiffani seems skeptical, Spike seems like a wild-eyed hobo.

 

Spike and Tiffani get to pick teams. Spike picks almost all the boys plus Carla, Tiffani gets all the ladies (that’s what she said) plus Tre and Big Gay Dale. He describes the two groups as “the Spice Girls and their bodyguard and the cool guys and babysitter Carla.” Meanwhile Jamie and Little Mad Dale aren’t exactly enthused about having to help someone else win immunity. Hey, guys, there is no “I” in Top Chef.

 

For her part, Jamie seemed well aware of how her attitude played to those at home and noted on her Twitter feed (@ChefJamieLauren) last night:

Though, I think staring unblinking into the camera and saying “I have no interest in having children. Ever.” is possibly not the best way to try to endear yourself to American households. Just saying.

At the museum, the choice becomes pretty apparent. Gee, children, what would you rather have? Carrot/potato chips with a weird dip or an enormous chocolatey ball of love? Victorious Team Sugar–n-Spice Girls seems a little worried about pumping all that unrefined energy into those wee bodies. But, as Casey notes, “they’re not my kids.” Before they can revel in their win, head judge/papa bear Tom Colicchio strides in. You thought you were going to sleep? Silly cheftestants. Save your looks of quiet despair for restaurant wars.

It’s Elimination Challenge time instead. They will be making breakfast for the kids and their parents in the morning. The teams stay together, but have to choose between all meat (T-Rex diets) or all vegetables (Brontosaurus diets). As the winner, Tiffani picks Team T-Rex. The teams try to plan their menus, but they’re still not sure exactly what will await them in the pantry so it’s more like wishful thinking. While you’re at it, can I have a pony?

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