“The Returned” recap (1.6): Pied Piper of Zombies


Jerome shows up unannounced at Claire’s and yells at her for letting Pierre share Camille’s true identity with the group and calls him a fraud. Just then Thomas comes looking for Alice, she needs to come down to the station and bring identification. I bet Pierre runs with a crowd that can falsify some documents rather quickly.

Alcide is snuggled up to Lucy as they try to put together a sketch of her attacker on his laptop. The results are pretty damn close to Serge with the exception of slightly feminine lips.Back at the farm, Lena wakes up and takes a look around while Serge finds her some clothes. When she happens upon a creepy taxidermy room, he quickly enters to let her know it is Toni’s hobby and not his. No need for concern. As Lena changes into clothes from his mother’s closet, Serge turns and plays with one of the many knives lined up on the table. Time to thank the man for his hospitality and run as fast as you can.


Toni wakes up from his alcohol induced nap at the bar to see who is knocking. As I type this I realize a lot of this show’s scenes start with knocking.  Just an observation. Any way, it is Bruno checking to see why The Lake Pub hasn’t opened yet. There are only two eating establishments in this town so it is a major cause for concern. Bruno provides him with the sketch of his brother and Toni denies recognizing the suspect and goes back to downing whiskey.


Camille, Claire and Jerome hunker down at the Helping Hand shelter to keep Camille safe. Meanwhile, Toni drunk drives to the farm and apologizes mistakenly to Lena for killing Serge through the locked front door. After that revelation, she listens to Toni and Serge discuss the police manhunt before Toni walks off with a rifle to protect everyone. True to almost every woman in danger onscreen she runs up instead of out. Serge finds her in the attic and Lena confronts him with a knife. Instead of stabbing him and escaping, she gives up the knife and decides its cool to have sex with him. With all the poor decisions she makes it is amazing that she is the “living” twin.


As Julie sits Victor down for a meal, Pierre arrives to protect them. Despite his warnings, Julie does what she does best and shuts the door in his face. She tells Victor to pack up and heads to her room to do the same.


Adele asks her daughter if she would like to play a game to pass the time and Chloe suggests Truth or Dare. Well played, little girl. After getting no clear answers about Simon’s suicide, Chloe suggests asking him why he did it if he comes back again. Cue Simon, kicking his way out of the morgue freezer. At the same time, Lucy rises from her bed with a knowing look. Simon steals some clothes from a nearby locker and comes upon Lucy in the hospitals halls. As the lights flicker, she calls out to him to come with her. Without questioning, he takes her hand and they walk off like she is the Pied Piper of the undead.


Bruno and Michael show up at The American Diner and it looks like Amanda Byne’s hotel room at The Ritz. They talk to the owner about the place being ransacked for food then show him the police sketch. He immediately tells them it is Toni’s brother who has a few screws loose, but he hasn’t heard about him in 10 years.

At the end of this episode, Camille continues her good will work with another school mate’s parents and tells them he is waiting for them on the other side. Sandrine watches on with a look that says, “Oh no she isn’t.” Laure arrives home to find Victor and Julie inside. Which means Julie kept the key, that is promising. Laure gives Julie the bad news that they in fact did not catch her attacker, while Victor looks out the window and sees Chloe playing outside.


Toni decides it is a good idea to pull his rifle on the police and shoots Michael in the leg. As Bruno and Michael retreat, Serge allows Lena to take off for her own safety. I wonder what it is about her that stops his primal urges.


Back at The Lake Pub, Lucy strips out of her hospital garb while talking to Simon. She tells him she is his guardian angel then promptly mounts him.


Thomas calls Adele to tell her about Simon’s breakout. She quickly locks all the windows and doors except for one that Chloe reopens. As Lucy and Simon have sex she tells him she can see his suicide. During quick cuts we see someone hanging themselves with bed sheets only to reveal it is the parents Camille talked with earlier. They took her too literally and hung themselves to see their son sooner than planned.


Lena is still running through the wilderness and as night falls she comes upon a group of shadowy figures lit by a bonfire. Maybe there are more violent criminals down there she can have sex with. Only time will tell.

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