“The Real World: Ex-Plosion” recap (29.3): The Departure

 
 

The episode starts out with Cory harassing people on the sidewalk while wearing a bear suit, which has hopefully been laundered post-Ursus-coitus. “I live in a zoo,” remarks Jenny, ignoring him.

Cory tells us that he and Jenny aren’t over, that there is no way Jenny can look at him and not want to jump back in the shower with him. Jenny tells us that she will only take Cory back if he can manage his anger issues.

Meanwhile, someone has torn up all of Jay’s phone numbers and now he cannot make phone calls. He has no idea who did it, and no one confesses.

It is Jenny’s birthday, so they all go to a club and get drunk. Cory tells Jenny to have fun, because it is her birthday, and Jenny twerks and does splits on the dance floor. A random guy named Oscar asks Jenny if he can buy her a drink and she goes to the bar with him. Cory is not happy with this.

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Back home, Thomas is so drunk he falls off the bed, and Jamie remarks that she heard the sound guy laugh.

Cory complains to Jenny that she is like all the girls back home. “Been there done that,” he says. “Whatever,” says Jenny. Jenny fights the urge to slap Cory but decides to walk away and go to bed.

“Thomas is the smartest kid in the house,” says Jay. “All he does is go to bed.”

The next day Jenny is hung over, but Arielle coaxes her off the couch to get her hair fixed. Jenny’s roots are growing in, and friends don’t let friends walk around with bad hair. Midway to the salon, Jenny gets sick, runs off the bus and pukes as Arielle looks on and shakes her head.

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Jay patches his phone numbers back together and tries to call his mom, who is sick. He learns he has been calling the wrong number for two days and finally reaches his mom, who tells him she is going to get surgery.

Cory and Jenny try to make up and Jenny tells us that they were probably using each other as rebounds. They decide to be friends. Let’s see how that works out.

Jay gets a phone call from his dad, who has bad news. His mother did not make it through surgery. Jay is so upset he hands the phone to Arielle, who talks to Jay’s dad and then tells him Jay will call him back. Arielle gives Jay a hug, trying to console him. The entire house gives their condolences, and Jay calls his ex-girlfriend telling her that he barely knows anyone in the house but everyone is upset and it feels like they are family.

“I would have fell apart if I didn’t have my roommates with me,” Jay tell us. But he adds that someone in the house tore up his phone numbers and had that not happened he could have had two more days of conversation with this mother.

Cut to earlier footage of a blacked out Ashley tearing up the piece of paper. This is not going to end well.

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Jay has arrived in NYC to attend his mother’s wake and funeral and he tells his family how aggravated he is that someone in the house tore up his phone numbers and did not confess.

Back in San Francisco Arielle has other problems. “Not having sex is going to kill me,” she tells us. She says that she is going to have one-on-one time with her favorite rubber toy that vibrates. As she gets ready to get busy with herself, Thomas strolls into the room to chat about quesadillas. Womp.

That night, Ashley calls up her club promoter friends, who get the entire house bottle service. Ashley makes a lot of duck faces into the camera. Then inexplicably, she threatens to leave the show again. By this time the roommates are used to her drunken outbursts and mostly ignore her.

“I give Ashley the crazy drunk academy award for her performance,” says Jenny.

In the Bronx, Jay is on the way to his mother’s funeral and his ex Jenna arrives. They kiss and Jay tells us that he is glad she is there.

Back in San Francisco, Arielle is on the phone with her ex Ashley. She tells us that she misses her but she could not chase her dreams and also be with her.

Meanwhile, Ashley cannot find her purse and she runs through the house crying. The producer, probably also sick of her nonsense, calls her, telling her, “You threw it on the floor last night.” Ashley still cannot find it and she starts flipping plants over in the house. The roommates note that Ashley is a ticking time bomb.

After taking shots with this family, Jay calls the roommates from the Bronx thanking them for supporting him through this time.

Arielle is excited that her ex Ashley is visiting, mostly because Ashley is more exciting than a vibrator. Ashley arrives and the roommates remark that she is really attractive. Ashley and Arielle go to the confessional, where they giggle and flirt, then they run off to the bedroom for some sexytime.

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The rest of the house goes to a club, where crazy roommate Ashley leaves and hangs out with her boyfriend Francis and her local friends. The next morning, the roommates notice that Ashley is nowhere to be seen. They don’t seem concerned. In fact, they are relieved.

Everyone goes to meet Jay at the airport, and Jay tells us that while he was gone it looks like the house spiraled a little out of control.

Three days later and Ashley is still MIA. Thomas tells us he could care less where she is. Jamie says her ass may be hanging out somewhere.

Then Ashley calls the house. Jay picks up. She tells him she is coming back if the rest of the house is ok with it. Jay says the house will take a vote and let her know. Four said “no.” Two said “yes.” Bye Ashley!

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After the decision, everyone in the house is all smiles. “I’m happy Ashley left. Shoot, get her out! Everything is rolling smooth. It looks like we are actually going to get along,” says Cory.

 
 

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