“The Playboy Club” recap: Episode 3

In the dressing room, Nick finds CL getting ready and tells her about how Alice’s husband has been trying to get hired for his campaign. CL apparently knows of Sean’s great reputation as a campaign manager. It’s a trap, Bunny Momma! Nick goes into how Sean is trying to convince him to change the public’s perception of him. CL agrees and says, “Kennedy ruined it for everyone.” He then proceeds to tell her how he already told Sean he had the right woman by his side, but that Sean thought the voters wouldn’t agree. This breaks CL’s heart, and mine. She asks who the public will understand, and he tells her about Frances Dunhill. CL already knows that Frances is a socialite whose father is very influential. Nick says he won’t do it if it will cause any problems between the two of them. She asks, “Will it?” He says no and smiles his smarmy smile, telling her what a huge scam it is for the cameras but that nothing will change between the two of them. They kiss, he says it’s all for show.  She says the show must go on, but her face says she will cut a bitch.

Back on the floor, Inquisitive Bunny Doris asks, “Bunnies aren’t allowed to date key-holders right? Most Bunnies flirt like their lives depended on it.” Wise Bunny Brenda breaks it down and says, “It’s not their lives, it’s their livelihoods.” She goes on to say that the men come there and expect certain things. I need to pump the breaks here and ask what we’re all thinking: CL saw WHAT in this girl? She keeps digging deeper for more from Brenda, asking if the girls serve up more than drinks with a garnish. (Holy crap, I just got lost in a time-warp somewhere down Bunny Brenda’s cleavage when I paused on this image.)

Brenda says she’s not talking about the bunnies having sex and this Doris chick is getting on my last nerve asking about the reputation the club has, sex and Mr. Bianchi last being seen there. Yep, this can’t go anywhere good. Brenda says that’s the rumor she heard, but she really doesn’t know. Doris just won’t stop with the questions and finally Brenda says she’s not a police officer, so what would she know? Stop being weird, Doris. She then asks Brenda to cover for her while she goes to “call her mom before Ed Sullivan starts” and I’m hoping Brenda senses the weirdness emitting from that odd bunny tail.

As I suspected, Doris made it into the club under false pretenses. She’s trying to get information about the Bianchi disappearance but it’s hard to tell which side she’s on. I’m still not giving up on my lesbian call celebration dance just yet, but now I’m hoping I was wrong.

Nick begins his date with Frances and she says she knows she’s there as arm candy. John comes to have a word with Nick and says he’s not done questioning Maureen. Nick goes to warn Maureen to watch her back around John, and she says she needs to worry more about what CL thinks. Sneaky Doris manages to creep over towards their conversation and looks menacing.

When Mr. Dalton makes his way back to the table, a slight ping stirs up beneath me. Could it be? Was I wrong? Is Frances a lesbian? Oh please let it be so! I saw the way she looked at that bunny tail, she was about to go all Elmer Fudd on it.

We are treated to a performance by Colbie Caillat, guest starring as her gayness, Lesley Gore. Frances says she loves the song and asks Nick to dance. Totally gay and taking the lead. Love it. Sean is psyched that it’s working and CL is pissed! Other bunnies are getting down.

Doris has made her rounds questioning the rest of the bunnies, so now it’s poor sweet Alice’s turn. This time, the questions are about Nick Dalton and his relationship with CL. She wants to know if they’re still together since he’s out getting jiggy on the floor with Frances. And yes, I did just say “getting jiggy.” Alice says, “Oh things aren’t always what they seem.” Doris asks what she means and, damn it, Alice, for someone so good at keeping a secret, you sure are lousy with secrets. She tells Doris about how her husband is Nick’s campaign manager and set the whole date up for publicity.

Doris has scored some info and calls the guy she answers to. She tells him that Nick is hiding something, but CL catches her and tells her to get off the phone during her shift. Billy closes up shop, but not very well AT ALL, leaving Doris to go through all of his belongings. She steals all of the girls’ files and runs out the door.

Back at the bunny dormitory, the girls are doing what all of us girls do when no one else is around: Having dance parties in our bras! “The Locomotion” just brings that out in us. The phone rings and Janie says not to answer it because it’s probably Max. The phone keeps ringing and a flustered lady comes in asking them what they’re doing. They were supposed to meet her ten minutes ago to go to the club. The girls say, “The music came on,” and “It was ‘The Locomotion’!” See! I told you! It’s Max on the phone and Janie hangs up on him. Time to go back to dancing!

Pearl and CL have their usual heart-to-heart session for the episode, in which something comes out about her and Nick’s relationship and also something about a bunny who might be up to no good. At Doris’s station, they find a piece of paper that alludes to a triangle in which she and Nick are both involved.

Over in rich man’s land, Nick is lucky enough to be seen with that gorgeous redhead, Frances, at her father’s mansion. Mr. Dunhill tells Nick he’s got great taste in women, but what else does he have? Nick ends up charming the pants off of all the rich white men in the room. Frances leaves him with a nice goodnight kiss for her father to see. Crafty! She must be gay.

At the club, Maureen passes John a note to meet her in the storage room. He follows her lead because who wouldn’t? She tells him about how Nick warned her about John and said he was dangerous. He tells her that under the right circumstances he is, but beautiful women are the most dangerous. She’s like, “Well what are you still doing here then?” and he says his middle name is “Danger.” She tells him to just go ahead and ask her what he wants to know.. He says not yet, he’ll ask tomorrow night. Those two should just do it already.

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