The Oscar hookup

 
 

Certainly, it’s fun to see the gowns and the glamour of the Oscars. But almost as fun as all the fashion is seeing the big night’s assorted couplings and comminglings: who arrived with whom, who made a new friend, who hooked up in the bathroom of the Vanity Fair party and so on.

With Ellen DeGeneres hosting and Melissa Etheridge winning for Best Song, lesbian power couples were out in all their finery:

Ellen and Portia, looking swoony.

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Melissa and Tammy, looking glowy.

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But if you were hoping someone else might make a splash and choose Hollywood’s night of nights to show off a new love that dare not speak its name, you were disappointed. Luckily, we gay gals have active imaginations. Consider these couplings the should-have-beens of Oscar Night 2007.

Anne Hathaway and Emily Blunt: See, those rumors were true.

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Nicole Kidman and Naomi Watts: Look at Nicole, all butch, leading tiny Naomi about.

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Beyoncé and Gwyneth Paltrow: These two appear to be in the shy, first-blush phase. Give it time girls, give it time.

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Oprah and Mary J. Blige: Gayle’s got competition. Forget no more drama; I see major drama.

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Kate Winslet and Helen Mirren: All my dreams have been fulfilled and I can now die a happy woman.

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