“The L Word” Recaps: Episode 5.3 “Lady of the Lake”

The Planet — Tom is still crushing on Max. Across the room, Max tells Grace (Hi, Grace! Where have you been?) about the flirting incident outside the restroom.

Grace: Are you attracted to him?

Max: No, of course not.
Grace: It wouldn’t be such an outlandish thing. The last trans guy I dated —
Max: Look, I’m not into men.
Grace: The last trans guy I dated wasn’t into men at all before he transitioned. She was a gold-star butch lesbian.
Max: I’m not a gold star, either.
Grace: Julie was. Until she became Jake. Jake turned out to be a gay man.
Max: [looking over at Tom] I heard this theory that what’s genetically encoded in us isn’t attraction to men or attraction to women, but it’s same-sex attraction.
Grace: There you go.

Hmm. That’s interesting. Max is cute when he’s twitterpated. And the theory is kind of like what Nigella Lawson said in her essay about “designer dykery,” and Nigella seems pretty sharp to me.

The locker room of lunacy — As Alice and Tina primp, Jenny tells Adele to “do away with these sweaty things.” Princess Schecter, you make me chuckle.

Nearby, as Shane zips up her jeans, a woman notices her abs and asks to touch them. Shane freaks and says, “No, no, don’t, don’t, don’t, just don’t touch me today, please.”

Tina: She’s not gonna make it.

Alice: I don’t think she’s gonna make it.

Tina: No.

Alice can’t find her keys, which is apropos of nothing but gives her an excuse to look around the room aimlessly until her eyes land on a poster. It’s for the Subaru Pink Ride, which raises money for breast cancer research. Jenny announces that she’s doing it, so everyone else decides they’ll do it, too. Shane suggests they call themselves Team Dana.

Dana! Sniffle.

Tina: Yeah, and we can get Kit and Bette to do it with us.

Jenny: We should ask Jodi as well.
Tina: [gritting her teeth] And Jodi.

Shane points out that Jodi didn’t know Dana. Jenny points out that Jodi has breasts and therefore has a stake in the whole thing.

Jenny: You guys, you have to train for this. It’s so hard. If you don’t you’re not gonna finish it.

Ha ha — Shane, you just rolled her eyes! So did everyone who’s watching, but in a very amused way. Jenny almost sounded like a Valley girl.

I wonder if this is going to turn out to be a major part of the show, like that big bike ride for AIDS research on Queer as Folk? I hope they play that Queen song “Bicycle Race” at some point. Maybe Shane can even ride in Freddie Mercury drag.

Alice suggests they get Tasha to train them, “‘Cause, I mean, she knows how to train. Obviously.” Tina is confused; she thought Tasha was slated to ship out any day now. Alice hems and haws and makes an excuse. I kinda love that Alice doesn’t know how to lie.

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