THIS WEEK’S L WORD VOCABULARY:
Puzzle piece: What Dusty is to Helena.
Snobbery: A sign that you should probably go back to your ex.
Salubrious: Sex — both its absence and its presence.
THIS WEEK’S GUEST-BIANS: Lucia Rijker fantasizes about the future; Holland Taylor holds court; Malaya Rivera Drew checks Jenny’s vital signs.
The most meta teaser ever — Via voice-over, we learn that Alice had a dream about girls last night. Er, sorry, a dream about Lez Girls. Shane asks for details.
Alice: Me, you and Helena were, like, Charlie’s Angels.
I love it already! Except I sort of wish she had been able to say, “Me, you and Dana.”
Shane: Who was Charlie?
That would be Bette/Bev, natch. And everyone else is perfectly cast, too. Rachel Shelley is channeling Jaclyn Smith as Kelly; Kate Moennig has donned a smart vest and sleek wig to play Sabrina (the futch Kate Jackson role); and Leisha Hailey is an uproarious Farrah Fawcett/Jill Munroe, complete with dazed pout and awesomely feathered hair.
Bev: Once upon a time, there were three little lesbians who just hung out at a coffee shop. But I changed all that, and now they work for me.
Tina/Nina is Bosley — second in command to Bette/Bev once again. Laurel Holloman is pretty adorkable in that getup. She looks like the love child of Austin Powers and Ann-Marie MacDonald (Better Than Chocolate, Interviews With My Next Girlfriend and even The L Word).
Through a speaker phone with a rainbow flag on it, Bev tells the lesbians that their new mission involves going undercover.
Alice/Elise: Sure sounds dangerous. Are you sure it’s not gonna ruin our hair?
Bev: I promise you girls I won’t let anything happen to your hair or makeup.
This promise is much appreciated. And I think Leisha is cracking Rachel up.