“The L Word” Recaps: Episode 5.11 “Lunar Cycle”

From bad to worse — Jodi arrives and surveys the wreckage.

Jodi: Looks like somebody got here before me.

Everyone’s stunned to see her. Shane, Jenny and Alice (who have been cleaning up the upturned-table mess) pop up like curious prairie dogs as Jodi approaches Bette.

Tina: Jodi, I’m so sorry —

Jodi: [to Bette] Why is she talking to me? Doesn’t she know I’m deaf?

Yow!

Just like Nina and Bev in the Lez Girls scene, Jodi tells Bette they need to spend some time together. Now. So they leave.

Why are they dressed alike? Are we supposed to think they’re tailor-made for each other? Or are we supposed to understand that no matter how hard they try to be a good match, they just don’t go together? Or are they just really big Ohio State fans?

Jodi’s dead set on having a big talk right now, so Bette has to reschedule some meetings.

Bette: [on the phone with James] Yes, the one with Phyllis. I don’t care what you have to tell her. Just tell her I have wicked PMS, I don’t know. She probably doesn’t even remember what that feels like.

OK. That’s enough. It’s gone beyond stupid and right into sexist. And Bette would never, ever say that!

After Bette hangs up, Jodi relents a little and says she doesn’t want to cause problems at work for Bette.

Bette: This is the most important thing in the world to me.

Jodi: What is?
Bette: This. You and me.

Hmm. Well, that’s nice, even if it’s not entirely true. Jodi considers it and apparently decides it’s reason enough to climb into Bette’s Lexus. How many different cars has Bette had in these five seasons? Maybe in Season 6, she’ll have a Hummer and really do the alpha thing right.

Settling up — Back at PMS Planet, Max asks Tina whether she and Bette are going to move in together. Tina says they’re not planning anything yet because Bette has to talk to Jodi first.

Shane: I really respect you for showing some restraint and holding back. I do.

Tina: Well, it’s about time.

Nah, don’t feel bad. Bette has some sort of destruct-o-matic aura that pulverizes all the restraint within a 10-foot radius.

Tina has to dash because of a foreboding email on her BlackBerry:

Tina: Jenny had an art department meeting this morning, and she missed it, and Adele went in her place instead.

“In her place instead”? It’s like Heidi Klum saying, “Models, this is also a competition for you as well.” Welcome to the Department of Redundancy Department!

Max wonders why Adele didn’t remind Jenny about the meeting. Like you might expect an assistant to.

Tina: I’m sure she tried.

Max looks like he’s pretty sure she didn’t.

Tina throws a 20-dollar bill at Shane for the breakfast and scurries out. Shane pockets it, smirking like a gigolo.

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