Back to school for a quick round up of the kid drama. Lexi thinks Jesus is avoiding her and he says he’s not, he’s just got a lot going on with reconnecting with Ana in her house on the Hellmouth. Wyatt is still not talking to Callie, which is stupid because she’s adorable in her baseball t-shirt. She invites him to a silent movie so he can keep not talking to her. The scene is a perfect match for the one in which he asks her to come to his beach party instead of Mariana’s “look at me” party. After school, Jesus is at the house of the rising sun looking for Ana, instead he gets scary guy with his weed wacker haircut. This is going to end well.
Stef, Lena, and Gretchen are having a lovely time with Mariana who is apparently the only one without a date for the evening (way to go Jude!). Gretchen just keeps putting cards on the table and hoping something comes up rummy. First, she’s got stories and more stories about the famous people she knows and Mariana’s eyes light up like it’s Christmas morning. “Tell me about the time you hung out with George Clooney, again, grandma.” Ugh. Gretchen says she and Lena once had dinner with Clinton. Mariana almost piddles on the floor like an excited lhasa apso until Lena says “Bill, not Hillary.” Bummer.
Gretchen ups her game with tales of all the things Lena wanted, like a wedding. Lena says Stef doesn’t believe in gay marriage and I call bullshit, but we’ll go with it for now. Stef doesn’t want to get married again and Lena said that was fine with her. When Lena has enough, she leaves to check on the cornish hens (which she has named Gretchen, after their guest).
Mariana gets a text from Lexi, who is supposed to be with Jesus at a movie. The old switcheroo! When Jesus doesn’t answer her calls, Mariana start freaking out that he’s at Ana’s. Perhaps she is the smart one after all. In another part of town, Ezra and Aria meet at a silent movie to make out and disrupt the other people.