The Dateability Index: How Do Your Favorite Lesbian/Bi Characters Rate?

Brittany S. Pierce, Glee

Pros: Like a puppy, she loves to cuddle and smile and dance and wrassle and nap and be adorable.

Cons: Like a puppy, the only thing she can remember is what’s right in front of her face.

Dateability Rating: 2 Emily Fitches — She’ll eat cereal off the floor if that’s how you want to play it, but try to be better than that.

Callie Torres, Grey’s Anatomy

Pros: Will stand by your side through thick and thin, will see you for who you really are and love you anyway.

Cons: 66.67 percent of the people she sleeps with die in horrible accidents, but usually only if they have penises.

Dateability Rating: 4 Emily Fitches — Make her swoon with a lingerie/pizza-in-bed date.

Alison DiLaurentis, Pretty Little Liars

Pros: She holds the power of time and space and life and death in the palm of her hands.

Cons: Is she into you or is she just fucking with you? You’ll never know! XOXO!

Dateability Rating: Zero Emily Fitches. She is the opposite of Emily Fitch.

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