The AfterEllen.com Huddle: Our All-Star Team

 
 

Lucy Hallowell gave us all a great Huddle topic for this week. With the MLB All Star celeb softball game happening this week, we thought we’d put together our own team. Here’s who we’d want to pat our butts and hit the showers with.

Emily Donofrio: If I liked to play sports of any kind, I would need someone who was for real and on top of their game to cover my lack of athletic ability. I’m going to go with the obvious and have Dottie and Kit in my corner because I love a sister act and hopefully they’d help me coordinate my plays. Can Tom Hanks be our coach?

Lucy Hallowell: Kit Keller from A League of Their Own. Dottie might call her a mule but Kit can hit, pitch, and has plenty of spunk. Anyone who will run her big sister over at home plate in order to win is someone I want on my team.

Dara Nai: Unlike Lucy, I would pick Dottie Hinson over Kit Keller. She’s the better player and has a lot less emotional baggage. And for the outfield, I would draft the black lady who whipped that foul ball back to Dottie.

Courtney Gillette: Shotgun Abby Wambach! I know, I know: soccer is different than
baseball. Duh. But since the rest of my picks would probably be of
literary and/or musical persuasion (Alison Bechdel, Beyonce, Tamar
Kali
, Beth Ditto and Jeanette Winterson — I bet she’s got a
competitive streak, yeah?), I think one (really hot) athlete would do
us good. Play ball!


Photo from Getty

Bridget McManus: I’d pick Calzona! Since they are a couple I insist that they count as one pick. Dr. Callie Torres and Dr. Arizona Robbins already own their own softball gloves and they are so cute maybe they will distract the other team causing them to miss the ball.


Photo from CTV

Mia Jones: I would love to see what would go down if Queen Latifah, Missy Elliott, Ciara, Eve, Heather Peace and Chili from TLC (because have you seen her body?) were on a team together. I’d call them Lip Swervice.


Photo by Mike Coppola/Getty

Trish Bendix: I’m trying to be on Lip Swervice.

Ali Davis: I’d pick Peppermint Patty to pitch and Marcie to catch. Accomplished switch-hitter Xena bats clean-up. If I can just get Hermione Granger to read up on softball theory and coach, I’m pretty sure we’ll take the championship.

The Linster: I would choose Elizabeth Mitchell because of, well, this. If I saw her in a baseball cap in real life, though, I doubt I’d live to see the game.

Dorothy Snarker: Please, like there was ever any question. I’d want Det. Jane Rizzoli and Dr. Maura Isles on my team. Well, we all want them on our “team.” But to have them on at very least our softball team would mean we’d get to see Jane in her baseball cap and Maura in her spandex bodysuit. Also, they’re probably bicker the whole game like the old married couple that they are. “Maura, you’re dropping your shoulder!” “Maura, bend your knees more!” “Maura, look for your pitch!” “A spitter? Jane, is she really going to spit at me?” Stuff like that. That kind of entertainment is totally worth the cost of a $8 hotdog and $12 beer.

Who’d you put in, Coach?

 
 

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