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The 9 worst fictional lesbian/bi deaths of 2013

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of representation, it was the age of impossible cancer storylines, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of throwing stuff at the television, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had Visibility before us, we had played tropes before us, we were all going direct to Heaven – because that’s what lesbians do, OK? They die.

Yes, 2013 offered up a lot of lesbian/bi storylines worth celebrating, but sufferin’ Sappho, the deaths we dealt with this year. Below are nine of the absolute worst. 9. Kissing Lesbian Couple, Teen Wolf Teen Wolf is to gay men what Pretty Little Liars is to lesbian women: a homoerotic romp of unprecedented proportions. But unlike PLL, Teen Wolf‘s main gay, Danny Pectorals, gets serious sexual action. Last season, Standards and Practices even had to tell the show to tone down the thrusting. I mention that because the two lesbian ladies we met at a campsite got more on-screen sexytimes in the five minutes we knew them than most other lesbian couples get over the course of ten seasons on other shows. So losing them to the Darach (don’t ask) was a real bummer. 8. Fearless Defenders Fearless Defenders really messed with our heads this year. An all-female superhero team: Yay! Introducing a lesbian team member: Yay! Killing her off almost immediately: Boooo! Bringing her back from the dead: Yay! Adding another lesbian character of color as a love interest/brand new superhero: Yay! But then Marvel went ahead and murdered the entire series. The last issue hits stands this month. Booooo! 7. Pam and Tara’s Hormones, True Blood Remember when Pam and Tara finally smooched each other all hot and bothered at the end of True Blood‘s fifth season and we were like, “Whooo boy, what will happen next with those two?!” Well, nothing happened. Nothing at all. We thought they wouldn’t be able to keep their hands off each other, but the only thing they couldn’t stop doing was talking about Eric every hour of every day for time immemorial, while every straight couple in Bon Temps crawled all over each other, on-screen, like a pack of hyenas in heat. RIP Pam and Tara scissoring dreams. 6. Bullet, The Killing Adding an androgynous lesbian character (played by Bex Taylor-Klaus) to their line-up was an awesome move for The Killing. Letting us fall in love with her and then stuffing her in a trunk was not.

5. Alice, Under the Dome Alice was originally part of The Summer of Lesbian Plenty. We scarcely knew what to do with all the queer female characters that were tossed at us starting in June. Sadly, Alice – who was part of the most watched show of the whole summer – succumbed to the epidemic that took the lives of the majority of her counterparts. Also, she succumbed to Stephen King‘s imagination, which happens to the best of us sometimes, I suppose. 4. Kenya Rosewater, Defiance How surprised we all were to find ourselves falling in love with Mia Kirshner‘s brothel owner on SyFy’s post-apocalyptic summer hit. Jenny Schecter who? Multiply that shock times one thousand and that’s how we felt when Kenya Rosewater and Stahma Tarr started falling for each other/doing a lot of sex. Too bad our shock and surprise ended in a resigned groan when Stahma poisoned poor Kenya to death in the woods while singing her a Castithan lullaby. 3. H.G. Wells’ Endless Wonder, Warehouse 13 When Helena died all the times she died on Warehouse 13, we clutched our pearls and cried our tears, but we accepted it because she was always sacrificing herself to save Myka Bering (aka The Love of Her Life). She didn’t die again in season four, but her endless wonder sure did. H.G. Wells, the Mother of Science Fiction and one of the brightest minds in the history of the space-time continuum, gave up her dreams and her True Love to live in Bumblefuck, Wisconsin with some random everyman and his daughter. Which feels an awful lot like dying to us. 2. Cristina, Tierra de Lobos This wound is still too fresh to talk about. At this point, we’re pretty much still shaking our fists at the sky. WHY? It didn’t have to happen like this! WHY?!? 1. The Holiest of Holy Things, Skins: Fire Oh, you know, just one of the most uplifting, soul-sustaining, worshiped, revered, canonized, iconic lesbian love stories ever told ruined by bringing back the characters for an epilogue that was nonsensical and hackneyed and ended with Naomi dying of an undefinable type of rapid-cell cancer that kills you faster than even Ilene Chaiken on her angriest day. Skins: Fire is easily the cruelest, most callous bit of storytelling I have ever seen on television in all my life. #NeverForget

What do you think was the worst fictional lesbian/bi death of 2013?

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