Believe it or not, 2007 is quickly winding down. The new year will be upon us before you know it. As a result, I am currently trying to decide which new calendar will adorn my sparsely decorated cubicle in the coming year. Really, the idea of shopping around for a new calendar is the fault of Sporty, Posh and the rest of the Spice Girls. They will not be adorning my walls, but news of their new 2008 calendar is what prompted my train of thought.

Sure, they're not horrible to look at or anything, but the two-month reunion tour will be more than enough Spice Girls for me. A full 12 months would just be overkill in my world. Paris Hilton has a 2008 calendar too, but any time spent with her would be too much for me.

Instead, I'm thinking something more along the lines of Battlestar Galactica or The L Word. The only problem is, while my cubicle is sparsely decorated, I have room for only one 2008 calendar. And frankly, the options are almost endless. So, instead of shelling out my hard-earned cash for something published by someone else, I decided to create my own calendar for 2008. And what kind of blogger would I be if I didn't share my latest brainstorm with all of you? (A non-working one, that's what kind.) So, for your perusal and enjoyment, here is Siege's 2008 wall calendar.

January — Melissa Etheridge

Her voice alone would keep me warm on a cold January night in the Midwest, and frankly, it has. Oh, to be the lucky farm girl who gets to curl up next to this every night. … continue reading

Until quite recently, I didn't give a toss about the upcoming J.J. Abrams reboot of Star Trek — not for any lack of geekiness, but because ever since Generations let me down, I've relied on my sister to stay remotely in the loop. Then along came a casting sheet, courtesy of Ain't It Cool News:

"[UHURA] 25ish -African American. Brilliant, beautiful, heroic and FUN!, Uhura is almost tom-boyish - as if she grew up in a houseful of brothers."

Brilliant, beautiful and "tom-boyish"? That certainly got my attention (and not just because of the bizarre punctuation and sentence structure). Sure, the call sounds a bit corny and oversimplified, and the first Lieutenant Uhura isn't much of a tomboy, but she is by far my favorite character in the original series. As the Sci Fi channel says, "She's the intergalactic switchboard operator we'd all like to be put through to."

Whoever plays the young Uhura has some big shoes to fill. Nichelle Nichols' groundbreaking role inspired legions of fans, from future NASA astronaut Mae Jemison (who grew up to be the first African-American woman in space) to Whoopi Goldberg (who grew up to host The View).

Uhura's part may have been small, but she was smart and gorgeous — and could kick serious, sexy ass when required. Watch her show parallel-universe Sulu who's in command: … continue reading

Cable network A&E has signed on to develop a new pilot called Danny Fricke. The show centers on a female homicide detective in Los Angeles. The deal hinges on the casting of the pilot, specifically the lead. A&E executives want her to be "sexy, smart and tough, and believable as a detective." Since Mariska Hargitay already has a job, I figured it couldn't hurt to offer the folks over at A&E a few helpful suggestions. Of course, I have a couple of criteria of my own to add. In order to be believable as a homicide cop, she can't be 20 years old, and she can't be a size zero. In no particular order, here are my suggestions. Feel free to chime in with your thoughts.

5. Rose Rollins

She plays a tough MP on The L Word, so a Los Angeles homicide cop isn't too much of a stretch. Plus, she looks like she could actually arrest someone. She can arrest me anytime she wants.

4. Demi Moore

She wore a gun and a badge in Mr. Brooks and made us believe she was a Navy Seal in G.I. Jane. Throw in a few Charlie's Angels–inspired action sequences and I'm sold. … continue reading

I gotta say, I love Episode #6. It's the introduction of MONIQUE, as well as MISTY and COLBY. Rose Rollins is an effing genius. I told her to go off on my friend, JOEL MICHAELY, who is playing IRRITATING LAUNDRY GUY. Hilarious. A couple of years ago, we didn't have a washer-dryer and would have to go do our laundry at this laundromat in Hollywood, and I ran into this annoying guy who took my damn clothes out of the dryer before it was dry and gave me this big bulls--- explanation — anyways, this is my filmic revenge.

We had about a half hour to shoot the laundromat scene. The owner of the location said we could shoot there, but didn't want to shut down, so we had to do the crazy scene with people around doing their laundry. … continue reading

In the second segment of our video blog this week (watch the first one on Lesbians and Ladies Rooms here), Lori and I rate and review the movies and TV shows we watched in the past 10 days or so, which include the new Harry Potter movie Order of the Phoenix, Gray Matters, Puccini for Beginners, Girltrash, Hell's Kitchen(Fox), Army Wives (Lifetime), Baldwin Hills (BET), Greek (ABC Family), Entourage (HBO), The Closer (TNT), Standoff (Fox), and the History Channel documentary The Star Wars Legacy.

Yes, I realize it looks like Lori and I did nothing but watch TV and movies this week, but we're discussing a few TV episodes from the previous week, too, and it's not very often that a Harry Potter movie and two lesbian movies get released around the same time. If only they would put a lesbian in a Harry Potter movie, our life would be complete!

You'll notice a few differences in this segment: We didn't use captions because it would have taken WAY too long, since we covered so much ground in this one — and as much as I like doing this vlog, I don't want to give up my entire Sunday for it. But we'll still use captions whenever it makes sense (which will be often).

We're also using this segment to introduce our new Bunny Designation System (BDS), which is sort of like a rating system, but with bunnies. It's hard to explain, but basically ... Lori likes bunnies. And it was better than anything else we could come up with. So if you don't like it, no chocolate from the Easter Bunny for you this year! … continue reading

Remember the '80s? Big hair, big belts and blue eye shadow. The Bangles taught us to "Walk Like an Egyptian." Conservative Christians crucified Madonna for her latest video devilry (OK, some things never change). And at The Breakfast Club, Claire (Molly Ringwald) realized that, despite all their differences, she really could fall for Allison (Ally Sheedy). Oh, wait — that was me.

With this week's theatrical release of Transformers, everyone's saying the '80s are Hollywood vogue. And it's true that we'll soon be seeing an animated Thundercats, G.I. Joe, and a live-action He-Man (I'm not kidding). Not to mention that a sixty-something Indiana Jones will find something else to raid in 2008. (AfterEllen hottie No. 48 Cate Blanchett will appear in that one — count me in!)

I was the '80s girl who ditched her Care Bears for the neighbor's more poseable boy-dolls, so even though the trailer for Transformers features stunningly hackneyed dialogue like "The car picks the driver. It's a mystical bond between man and machine," I can't help but feel a little nostalgic. And all these years later, I know what was missing back then: the lovely Australian lass Rachael Taylor. Here she is as Maggie Madsen, head of a DOD anti-robot team:

Probably few Pentagon employees show up to work with a lacy black bra peeking out, but whatever. At least she has the underwires to support a run for her life, unlike Megan Fox, whose character Mikaela Banes could be auditioning for an episode of What Not to Wear to Armageddon: … continue reading

Showtime has just announced that Tasha, Jodi and Phyllis will be back next season on The L Word. Marlee Matlin is continuing her role as a series regular, Cybill Shepherd's returning at guest-star status, and it's unclear how involved Rose Rollins will be.

No mention of Janina Gavankar, so I'm guessing that means Papi won't be back. Thank God! Gavankar seems nice enough, and she's not a bad actress, but I don't think I can handle another season of bad slang and even worse hats.

… continue reading