Have you ever walked out of a movie and thought, “Damn, I can sum that whole thing up in three lines or less”? Well, so did those clever bookish types at McSwenney’s. They recently summed up famous films in three lines of dialogue or less. The results for classics like Citizen Kane, The Philadelphia Story and The Godfather was inspired. That, of course, got me thinking about all the terrible great lesbian films out there.

So, without further ado, here is a sampling of lesbian movies in three lines or less:

Lost and Delirious

Paulie: But I love you.
Tori: But I can’t be gay.
Paulie: Why do I suddenly feel like singing “I Believe I Can Fly?”

But I’m a Cheerleader
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Megan: 2-4-6-8! Being straight is really great!
Graham: Gimme a G! Gimme an A! Gimme a Y! What’s that spell? Gay! Gay! Gay!
Megan: I like your cheer better. Let’s make out.