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“Survivor’s Remorse” recap (1.3): Granting Wishes

If you read my last recap, you know that my relationship with Survivor’s Remorse was not love at first sight. Maybe I am too much of a critic, but I’m not one to be carried away with a show just because it has a flashy pilot episode. It takes more than an interesting concept, a few funny lines and one or two lesbian/bisexual characters to sweep me off my feet. The television series must have thought-provoking, but not didactic dialogue; unique, complex and relatable characters; compelling exterior and interior conflicts’ and plot points that are surprising but not contrived.

It’s a tall order, I know. Yet, I have to admit that Survivor’s Remorse has kind of grown on me. I’m falling for this show and for the character of M-Chuck played by Erica Ash.

After an opening montage of the Atlanta skyline, we see Cam standing in a hospital parking lot. He isn’t happy. He hates hospitals and everything that goes with them-sick people, healthy people finding out that they are sick, sick people finding out that they’re never going to get better. The worst part is that he feels like granting a dying kid’s last wish will seem like a cheap publicity grab. Cam really doesn’t want to be there. Fortunately, he has his whole family is in tow to show him that even if it is mainly to get some positive press and a possible endorsement deal with Nike, bringing a sick child and his family some joy during a difficult time is the right thing to do. M-Chuck is happy to accompany her little brother inside the hospital because she likes any place where there are under-appreciated women. As a matter of fact, when Missy heads over to the nurse’s station to find her sorority sister and contact from the Aspirations and Wishes Foundation, M-Chuck offers to go with her.

“Do you have an off switch?” Miss asks.

M-Chuck responds, “Yeah. It’s shaped like a dick.”

“I’m proud of you,” Cassie Calloway tells her son. Then she sticks out her hand. “Can I have some money for lunch?”

Cam gives her his wallet. “I know how much is in there,” he tells her.

“Then you’ll know how hungry we are,” M-Chuck responds and gives him the finger.

Mama Calloway, Uncle Julius and M-Chuck go to the cafeteria for lunch (and to hit on hot nurses) while Cam and Reggie go to visit Johnny, who has recently slipped into a coma. Cam turns on his charm. He talks to Johnny, comforts his mother, Vanessa, and offers him some Cam Calloway autographed swag. Before he leaves he offers to teach Johnny how to dunk whenever he wakes up from his coma.

After the visit. Reggie and Cam are at the urinals in the bathroom where Uncle Julius finds them to return Cam’s wallet. He informs Cam that he is taking an extra $100 so that he and M-Chuck can take a couple of nurses out for coffee.

Reggie has had enough. He pleads with Cam to give his relatives jobs so they can budget how much everyone is spending. Cam refuses to put his mother to work, but agrees to make M-Chuck the head of public relations and appoint Uncle Julius as the head of household, executive assistant and driver. However, he insists that they pay them way above market value. He wants to be generous.

Cam tells Reggie, “I’m trying to make them happy.” Awww. He’s so sweet!

Reggie tells Cam, “The way we do that is to make sure we’re never poor again.” Yep, that Reggie is pretty smart. “The next time we’re back in Dorchester,” he continues, “is because they’re naming a street after you.”

“Nah! No! No!” Cam doesn’t want that. “Bad things happen on streets named after famous people. Look at Martin Luther Kind Blvd. That road is like death row.” Back at Cam’s apartment, Cam and Reggie deliver the news, as well as very generous checks, to the family. M-Chuck is excited about her new position in public relations and jumps right into her new role when Missy arrives with an announcement of her own. Johnny has woken up from his coma! Johnny’s mother credits Cam’s visit for his miraculous recovery. Cam is hesitant, but M-Chuck convinces him that it’s the right thing to do. And the fact that she could get great media footage is just a bonus. Cam agrees and M-Chuck gets to work making sure that Cam looks like the clean, caring, wholesome athlete that he is. The first order of business is getting rid of the box of pot and the huge bong that is sitting on the kitchen counter.

Later, Johnny and his mother are sitting outside on the patio with the Calloway family discussing the moment he woke up from his coma, when Johnny mentions the dunking lessons Cam promised. Vanessa doesn’t want to impose. Besides, she has to pick up her daughter. But Johnny doesn’t want to go. He knows he can be in a coma again tomorrow.

Ever the flirt, Uncle Julius tells Vanessa that he is the Calloway family driver and would be happy to take her to pick up her daughter. Cassie encourages her to take Julius up on his offer. After all, she deserves a break. Vanessa accepts and leaves with Julius while Cassie and Missy go inside to start dinner. As the rest of the gang heads out to find a park to play basketball, M-Chuck sidles up to her brother to let him know that she’s not going to let him down.

“Hey Cam, I’m so ready to take on PR,” she assures him. “I’m going to do my part in this family. Above and beyond. Gonna make you proud. Not just like you’re carrying me.”

“You carried me for a long time,” Cam replies and puts his arms around her.

And this is around the time that I started to fall in love with the show. Often the jokes are at the expense of women as M-Chuck and Uncle Julius are constantly trying to get laid-or at least pretending to be. The feminist in me gets annoyed at the frequent measuring and assessing of women’s bodies. However, every once in a while the characters show so much heart- whether it’s Cam’s desire to share his wealth with the people he loves or M-Chuck’s desire to earn her keep-that it’s clear that this rags to riches story is about much more than new cars and endorsement deals. Sure there’s a lot of pot and sex and crass jokes. But there is also a lot of soul searching, class and cultural conflicts, nods to African-American History (thanks to Missy) and lots of love. M-Chuck, Cam, Reggie and Johnny go to a park to play ball and a plot twist happens that made me appreciate the show even more. Young Johnny is away from his mother for the first time in a long time and takes this opportunity to tell Cam and his people to cut the crap. He doesn’t want to learn how to dunk. He’s 5’8″ and just woke up out of a coma. He couldn’t even if he wanted to. He’s more interested in getting a taste of the other side of professional baller’s life: blow, Ciroc and strippers.

Cam tries to convince Johnny that it’s not even like that. He’s not about that life couldn’t give him a taste of it, even if he was. But, Johnny’s not taking no for an answer. He gives an impassioned speech about how granting wishes to dying kids doesn’t give kids hope. It only serves as a distraction. Meanwhile, the rich and famous folks get painted as saints. He refuses to be a prop in Cam’s photo op. He demands that Cam gets him some strippers or he’s going to tell ESPN that Cam took him out to the court and forcibly sodomized him.

“Yo, we just got punked by a kid!” M-Chuck says when Johnny storms off. M-Chuck knows some strippers and offers to set it up, but Reggie takes control. M-Chuck reminds Reggie that she’s in charge of Public Relations, but Reggie says her job starts tomorrow.

Back at the apartment, Johnny is demanding a glass of Hennessy on the rocks while Reggie is on the patio trying (and failing) to get a couple of strippers to the house before Johnny’s mother returns. Lucky for Reg, Vanessa is too busy having sex with Uncle Julius in the car to realize that her son is about to get his true wish granted. Just when we think Cam is screwed, M-Chuck leans over and whispers in Johnny’s ear, “Down the hall. Second door on the left. Now.”

“Close the door and lock it.” She instructs Johnny. “See the distance between us now? You keep that distance. I’m going to go into the bathroom to take a shower. If I forget to close the door, that’s what we call an opportunity. An opportunity that will wipe our slate clean.”

“You’re the nicest girl I’ve ever met” Johnny says, breathlessly.

“Wait until you see my titties before you say that,” M-Chuck advises. “I’m really happy with them and other people have been, but you may be disappointed.”

“Can I touch them?” Johnny asks.

“No!”

“Why not?”

“Because I do not want go to jail!”

“The Georgia age of consent is 16,” Johnny informs her.

M-Chuck responds, “I don’t trust the justice system.”

But Johnny is persistent. “I won’t be alive to testify.”

“You little bastard. I’m about to show you my titties. I haven’t shown mine to a guy in a long time. You want to see them or not?”

“My dream is to finally touch them,” Johnny starts. But M-Chuck is not falling for his pitiful act.

“You know what? Your black mailing, half-eaten brain don’t even deserve this but I’m giving you a mulligan because you’ve been under a lot of stress. So, sit down over there, shut up and keep your hands to yourself. “

“Now I feel bad,” Johnny says. “You know, you don’t even have to do this.”

“Oh, I do.” M-Chuck tells him. “Public relations is my job.”

Cue the sexy music and M-Chuck slowly strips down and gets in the shower and Johnny whispers, “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” Later, everyone is at dinner, laughing, talking and eating. Reg leans over and tells M-Chuck that Johnny said they were square. He suspects that she has something to do with it.

“My job has been protecting this family for a long time,” she says.

Just when you think everyone has gotten the happy ending they wanted, Johnny face plants into his plate of food.

Cut to Johnny’s funeral. Cam is gives the eulogy. Vanessa places her son’s ashes into the autographed shoe that Cam gave him. Reggie leans over and whispers to Missy. “Watch-Nike will call tomorrow.” Missy smiles and tosses her hair as the credit rolls.

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