Step aside “Showgirls,” “I Know Who Killed Me” is taking over your pole

 
 

The trailer for Lindsay Lohan‘s new movie, I Know Who Killed Me, is out, and it’s a spectacle to behold. If you like that sort of thing, which I do. In the film, Lindsay plays a college student. And a stripper. And the survivor of an attack by a serial killer. Yeah, it’s complicated.

The film looks like a combo of Silence of the Lambs + Dancing at the Blue Iguana + Sybil. What does that add up to? Probably a cinematic train wreck of epic proportions.

Check it out:

Some questions raised by the trailer: Does wearing glasses really make you look smarter? Why is Lindsay more convincing as "Dakota" than "Aubrey?" What kind of name is "Aubrey" anyway? And what the hell is Julia Ormond doing in this crappy movie?

As a Lindsay fan, I think what I’m most looking forward to are all of the TV interviews she’ll be doing to promote the movie. I can’t wait to hear her tell Dave, Jay and Conan all about the psychological depths she plumbed in order to connect with her character, and how hard she worked to learn those impressive stripper moves. Who knows, maybe she’ll even give Ellen a lap dance!

Back in December, one of Lohan’s private emails to friends was leaked to a newspaper (not unlike her Myspace lesbian love letters –the girl really needs to choose better passwords!) and she told them of her training, "So . . . 3 hours of pole dancing and bruised. everywhere . . . I mean we’re talkin’ like, UPPER AND INNER THIGH ACTION-bruised . . . like a walking black-and-blue mark.

I mean really though, really, I didn’t know it was actually possible to have bruises in such areas of the body."

It really takes the concept of suffering for one’s art to a whole new level.

I Know Who Killed Me opens July 27.

 
 

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