Sofia Vergara talks boobs, hair and Madonna’s face

It’s been a long week. You had a lot of work/school/sitting around on the couch. You’re tired. You’re ready for the weekend. You deserve a little treat. You deserve a little Sofia Vergara — baking cookies, pantless.

Yeah, see, now that perked up your week. The Modern Family star spoke with Esquire magazine recently, answering questions from reader tweets. (Dude, lazy journalism much? Think of your own questions.) More signs the interview was with a men’s magazine, the first tweeted question (twestion?) was about her breasts:

What do you think of people staring at your boobs all day?

“Ay, but they don’t,” she says, laughing. (She is, by the way, a frequent and fantastic laugher — as well as a great and generous winker.) Not that she’s unwilling to discuss said boobs. At one point, Sofia says, she considered breast reduction. Luckily for men’s magazine readers and ABC executives, her mom talked her out of it, saying, “God is going to punish you if you cut them.”

Also lucky for us gay ladies, though we’d never ask her first about her rack. That’s a strictly second question kind of topic. And while we’re on follow-up questions, the 39-year-old has some interesting things to say about plastic surgery. Namely, she’s not a fan. While she said would consider some eye work in the future, the Stretch Armstrong look favored by many women of a certain age in Hollywood is not for her.

"L.A. is crazy. The women all look the same now. That thing with the cheeks. Like Madonna. Who do they think they’re fooling? It doesn’t make them look young. You end up looking like a freak."

Yes, for those keeping score at home, I think Sofia just called Madonna a freak. Is it bad that I’d like to see them get into a lady battle over these comments? Possibly involving Jell-O.

At age 18, Sofia was discovered on the beach in her native Colombia, wearing a G-string. That led to her big break, a popular Pepsi commercial.

 

As you’ll notice from the spot, Sofia is a natural blond. But when she came to the United States to act, casting agents weren’t buying a blond Latina. But then she dyed her hair and the rest is history — smoking hot history. How hot? Well, did I mention Esquire also has a little video?

 

You’re welcome.

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