The next day, Maura hasn’t stopped her scheming. She tells Jane they need to find a way to get rid of Strawberry Dweebcake. Jane tells Maura her mob boss daughter roots are showing. And Maura’s all, and don’t you forget it. I got a pair of concrete boots in the trunk for if you don’t behave. Now fetch me some grapes, mama’s hungry. What, you know she’s totally thinking that.
Alas, there’s no dirt on Strawberry Dweebcake to find. He has a clean record and his only noticeable flaw besides his terrible, terrible haircut is the dark circles under his eyes indicating severe allergies. Which means he probably can’t be around animals. Which means Lydia can’t have her dogs. Seriously, is the Rizzoli Trap really going to work after all?
The detectives, their jobs on the line because of budget cuts, stop momentarily from their homewrecking and matchmaking to interview a requisite red herring. Frost asks Jane if he can take Frankie along because, um, “he was really helpful.” Oh, sweetie, you don’t have to make up excuses. Jane takes Maura everywhere and no one blinks an eye. It’s 2013, everyone understands.
And so the murderer is arrested and justice prevails with two minutes left to air, just how we like it. Lydia arrives at Maura’s place to drop TJ off for babysitting with his gay aunts. Jane looks so excited she might actually eat the little guy. Like gobble him up like an ice cream sundae.
Lydia and Strawberry Dweebcake are about to leave for his going away party, but who should show up but Tommy with Jo Friday. Of course this triggers his allergies, which triggers Lydia’s realization that she can’t have dogs with him, which triggers her realization that he’s an enormous dweeb and totally not worth moving to Texas for – especially considering how regressive the state’s legislature is when it comes to women’s reproductive rights.
Lydia opts for a nice long walk with Tommy and Jo Friday (who is a good dog, who is, who is?) instead. This leaves Jane and Maura the happiest gay aunts in all the land. They high-five their successful scheming and settle down for a night of baby talk and couch cuddling.
But Maura, ever the worrier, asks what they’ll do if Lydia decides to stick with Strawdweeby after all. Jane says she’ll just have to go rogue. Maura says they’re going to have to discuss her lawless behavior. It’s all fun and games playing good cop/bad cop in the bedroom – but rules are there for a reason. Jane squints her eyes at her girlfriend and says simply, “Not in front of the nephew, Maura.” Yep, Auntie Jane and Auntie Maura sure do love their little nephew. That’s one lucky, lucky kid.
And now for your #gayzzoli tweets of the week. Consensus, Edie Windsor fought for your right to have your marriage be recognized on a federal level. So quit dragging your feed already, ladies.
— Lauren (@L_Ren_Iishi) July 10, 2013
Is this the episode where Jane and Maura get married by Father Crowley? #gayzzoli
— Dumb Truck (@SashasDumbTruck) July 10, 2013
— Jules (@mirettesvertes) July 10, 2013
LOL Maura running over to Jane when she thinks she’s looking at porn. #Gayzzoli
— Lindsay Calbeck (@CanadianHoneyy) July 10, 2013
— Dani Alfaro (@DaniiAlfaro) July 10, 2013
— ArdensMommy (@ArdensMommy) July 10, 2013
— Remy Ridge (@RemyRidge) July 10, 2013
— amber (@midnightxninja) July 10, 2013
— airikah (@airicat) July 10, 2013
— Agathe Rigault (@MissColombine) July 10, 2013