“Rizzoli & Isles” Subtext Recap (2.10): Hurt her and I’ll kill you, no really


Jane show up a little later, bandaged and bruised, to the Dirty Robber expecting her surprise party. But she finds an empty bar. I think she’s actually a little disappointed. Quick, Maura, kiss it and make it better.

She finally returns home to find, surprise, the real surprise party. They’ve decorated her place with a horsie motif, since try as she might Mama Rizzoli couldn’t find the My Pretty Pony gear she’d asked for. Someone call Santana, I bet you she knows exactly where to find Jane a proper Rainbow Dash.

Maura hands Jane a beer, in a can. And then drinks one herself. Quick, has anyone checked the good doctor for head injuries from her tasering? Maura says they’ll need a lot of beer after today, but that she can taste the aluminum. OK, whew, false alarm. Her mental functions are working just fine.

Frankie gives Jane his detective test results as his gift. He scored a 96 percent. Korsak says he had a good teacher but Frost chimes in that he’s the one who taught Frankie everything he knows. Oh, Frostie fans, this finale even had some love for you.

Maura slips in and hands Jane her own present next. Maura, Maura – that box is way too small for you to pop out of naked.

Instead, the box contains fire-resistant racing shoes. Which go along with the trip to racing school Maura gives Jane as her birthday. While it’s no naked Maura covered in marshmallow fluff, I think the look on Jane’s face says she loves it anyway.

And, if that weren’t enough, she gives Maura a happy, humpy hug as thanks. Now, everyone else go home because that little display was just a preview of the proper “hug” Jane plans to give Maura later that night, all night long. And, so, another summer season of Rizzoli & Isles ends as it should – with the bad guys dead and Jane and Maura in each other’s arms.

This show, you guys. This show. Should we even keep calling it subtext when it looks like this?

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