“Rizzoli & Isles” Subtext Recap (2.08): Maura kisses a boy and Jane doesn’t like it


Back at Maura’s place, That Lucky Bastard is making morning tea. Come on, tea? I mean it, squint and tilt your head and that’s just a tall butch lesbian with a goofy haircut. They make googly eyes at each other and make out some more, but then are blessedly interrupted when Maura hears Jane’s mom coming. She tells That Lucky Bastard to say they’re just colleagues because she doesn’t want to have to explain why anyone who isn’t Jane is serving her hot beverages in the morning.

Mama Rizzoli knows what’s up immediately. And she doesn’t like it. But Maura, who is the Queen of Deflection today, switches the topic to discuss Mama R studying to become a professional organizer. And then somehow Maura’s immaculate home gets offered as a guinea pig for her organizing homework. Anything to distract from the giant not-Jane shaped thing standing in the middle of the kitchen, eh?

Jane’s informant Rondo has come through with a tip in the form of a dead junkie on a park bench. Jane tells Korsak that something is off. And she doesn’t just mean the dead guy — it’s that disturbance in the Gayzzoli again.

Jane limps into the medical examiner’s room and tells Maura she must be feeling better since her shoes match. Maura’s phone buzzes and she chuckles at a text. Jane asks her who it is and Maura gives her the old, “It’s not important.” Poor Jane is all, “But, but, only I text you things that make you chuckle. And other things that make you, um, do other stuff.”

Maura gets another text and quickly hides the phone in her pocket. Jane says she’s acting weird, which is code for “straight.” And then asks if she wants to get a coffee later. Maura says, no, she already had tea earlier. And then smiles. Jane limps away confused and a hurt. Let me unequivocally go on record here and say Team Coffee forever!

In the cafeteria, Mama Rizzoli clues Jane in on That Lucky Bastard spending the night. Jane’s face goes from surprised to deflated to covering for her deflation in a flash. She pretends Maura already told her all about it. Aw, poor Janey. But Mama R can sense the truth. The Gayzzoli is strong with this one.

Maura calls Jane to tell her about some nail salon residue she found on the victim. When her phone buzzes again Jane asks pointedly, “Is that Ian?” Maura says That Lucky Bastard is “just an old friend.” An old friend with benefits, which coincidentally is a new rom-com opening soon starring Justin Timberlake and Betty White.

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