“Rizzoli & Isles” Subtext Recap (2.01): Absence makes the heart grow fonder


Back at the lab, they discover it was an American bullet and friendly fire that wounded Abby in action, not Taliban insurgents as reported. Lt. Col. Beard Force says the Army always owns up to its friendly fire accidents and Jane snarks back, “Tell that to Pat Tillman’s family.” And, another boyfriend bites the dust. Nice work, ladies. To celebrate, Maura invades Jane’s personal space while she’s on a phone call. I have a feeling being in each other’s personal bubbles is how a lot of things get celebrated between those two.

Maura then pulls the “You aren’t cleared for duty, so I must go with you” card and they leave together to interview the soldier. Anything to be near her gal. But another car goes boom, this time without an accompanying person. And then a house goes boom, and this time there is an accompanying person. A benched Jane paces and complains about being on the sidelines to Maura. When her reply isn’t appropriately sympathetic, Jane says, “When I talk do you hear, ‘Blah, blah, blah, Maura, blah, blah, blah.’” If you’re convincing us that you’re not an old married couple, you’re doing it wrong.

Lt. Col. Beard Force seems convinced the case is solved and goes to notify the other squad member with Jane. But then Maura discovers that he is really the bomber instead. Love triangle. Jilted jealously. Explosive endings. Story as old as time.

As if shooting herself through the abdomen wasn’t brave enough, Det. Jane Rizzoli proceeds to grab the live grenade the soldier is threatening to blow them all up with. With her bare hands. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again. Butch up, Olivia Benson, there’s a new most badass female cop on television.

Lt. Col. Beard Force drops by the office to say goodbye. She was so butch she scared him off. Or his leave ended, same thing. Maura comes in and Jane tells her he has left. She fakes a sad face, unconvincingly. She then says that heroes are actually social deviant, and calls Jane a hero. Hmm, what other group has been considered social deviants in the past that Jane falls into? Let me think, let me think… So that then makes Jane a “not girlie, crabby, social deviant.” Yep, sounds about right.

Maura takes one last shot at TGTGT and feels Jane’s wound good and proper. Jane can finally breathe without pain. This momentous occasional clearly calls for a little celebratory eye sex. And then they leave together to have the real thing. Hypothetically.

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