“R&B Divas” recap (Ep. 6): “We’re not having this conversation with cocktails!”

But then Nicci. Ugh. Nicci. So that rage I temporarily bottled up in order to be happy for Keke has been released again, because Nicci apparently thinks it’s a good idea to turn into Overprotective Yelling Nicci again. She starts going on about how we shouldn’t be having serious conversations while having cocktails and Keke’s therapist probably approve and they need to shut it down and it gets real awkward real fast.

Here’s why this enrages me: Nicci thinks she’s protecting Keke, but the fact that anytime Keke opens her mouth to share something vulnerable Nicci yells about it, is essentially shaming Keke even more and making it seem like Keke isn’t stable enough to make her own decisions. I understand if everyone else talking about Keke’s problems in a public restaurant might make you uncomfortable, per a few episodes ago, but there are so many things that are different about this conversation. First, Keke started it herself. Keke has ownership of this conversation, not you. Secondly, it is just the divas, hanging out. Talking about your issues in a safe setting with the people that love you most — yes, even if you’ve had a cocktail or two! — is what HELPS. It is HEALTHY. I don’t know if Nicci just has control issues, or if Keke being able to be open about herself triggers insecurity for Nicci within herself about issues, but it rubs me wrong in every single way. Either way, fancy food and massage time is over.

Turns out that Keke really isn’t holding back in this process, though, as the cameras tag along even as she goes in for her first therapy session, which seems to go well. She says, “I literally have no trust in my heart for no one.” Which makes me want to hug everything.

So now that we’ve gone through heartwarming, awkward, and disturbing moments, it’s time to end the episode with nothing but pure diva d-r-a-m-a. We arrive at a venue for an acoustic show Syleena is performing, where it seems like once again she’s dealing with incompetent people and everything is going wrong and even my blood pressure is starting to elevate.

She decides to take a step back from the seriously bad scene of trying to set up equipment and chill in her dressing room while her sister manager, Syleecia, gets it straightened out. But even in the dressing room, she’s confronted with some BS when told that if she wants water, she has to pay $5 a bottle for it. To which she has this response:

“Tell them to take the bottle of water, roll it up, and shove it so far up their ass that they become a fountain.”

*Slow clap*

On top of this stress is the fact that her father is coming, who will give them hell if things are anything less than professional. Sure enough, Syl shows up and he is clearly cray-cray. He apparently has had a few too many good times in his life, and he seems like that bumbling uncle everyone could love, if only his bumbling was full of kindness and not unyielding criticism. He shuffles around shouting a lot of crazy stuff and within five minutes makes everyone cry.

Syleena steps aside into the hall and cries into a tissue, “He’s the worst father ever.” Aaand I’m crying again.

Thankfully, it’s Mo to the rescue once again, as she shows up early to the show and tries to calm Syleena down a little. And when it’s time for the show, the place is packed, Syleena looks beautiful, and it’s time for what it’s all about: the singing.

But it is tough to sing when the mics aren’t working. Also when you can’t have water. Syleena makes some jokes about the hot mess that this venue clearly is, because that’s pretty much what you have to do in this situation; Faith sends up her girl a drink; her dad says some nice things about her on stage. Monifah also sings a super great duet with her.

Seriously, starting to become overwhelmed by the fashion on this show.

Basically in the end, Syleena’s voice still shines through, and it’s a show I would have loved to see in person. She ends with a song that makes Monifah and pretty much everyone cry.

But wait, where’s Nicci? Oh yeah, probably off somewhere being the worst.

But then afterwards, the promoter of the event, who had exchanged some Words with Syleena and Syleecia earlier when none of their equipment was prepared, got on the mic and started yelling about how she was not going to have people dissing her equipment and her team on stage and some other unprofessional nonsense, as everyone booed. Way to bring down the mood, promoter lady! Geez louise! Get a hold of yourself! Even I need a cocktail after all this!

In the previews for next week, the only thing that’s really apparent is that Nicci continues to be awful.

Phew! There was a lot to unpack in this episode. How did you survive the drama?

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