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“R&B Divas” recap (3.5): Grammy Don’t Play That

I’ve been feelin’ this season of R&B Divas since the first episode–as I’ve felt all previous seasons of the divas–but I think this week’s Episode Numero Cinco was the best one yet of Season Tres. There was a lot of music, a lot of drama, a lot of Monifah and Terez being adorable. It was the best of all worlds!

We begin with Angie and her man Ashanti shooting pool at her gorgeous house, living the dream. One day, I too will have a pool table and a fancy bar in the basement of my very own gorgeous house! That’s possible for writers and teachers, right? Right? Anyway, they’re planning a big party for Angie’s b-day, and Ashanti brings up the divas, hoping they will come and maybe sing a lil’, too. Hoo boy. This is the tricky part of having any kind of talent that is also your career. You want to share your talent with the people you love, for the act of celebration and joy and togetherness, when you want to. But you also don’t want to be EXPECTED to give it freely, because then it just feels like being taken advantage of. But we’ve been on this merry-go-round with the divas before, so we’ll see how this one turns out.

Monifah and Terez also meet together for the first time with their wedding planner, who is lovely and enthusiastic and bright, who appears competent and charming but not over-the-top, like some event planners can sometimes be. I am happy she’s the one in Mo and Terez’s corner. She lays out some vision boards, photos that are all, of course, filled with tropical shades of purple. Mo and Terez have settled on an island setting, but here’s the rub: not all islands are alike, and many in the Caribbean and the Bahamas aren’t yet down with the gays. They’ll allow you to have a ceremony, of course–they’re still down with taking your money–but there would have to be another marriage somewhere in the States to make it actually legal.

Terez says that it’s important that wherever they are actually celebrates, acknowledges, and welcomes who they are, not just with smiles but with actual legal rights. Sing it, sister. And while the Caribbean may be behind the times, Hawaii fits the bill. The only reason it wasn’t their first choice initially was because it’s a little farther than they had hoped for their East Coast family. But everything else about it makes sense. Hawaii is the place. MO + TEREZ HAWAII OR BUST 2014.

In one of the hilarious in-between commercial snippets that are increasingly my favorite thing, we also see Monifah say, wistfully and genuinely, that she wishes her cat could be part of the ceremony, too, but that it’s “too far” for Kitty to go. I know I’m not actually friends with Monifah, but sometimes, I feel like she is the biggest lesbian I know. KITTY OR BUST 2014.

We move to LaTavia’s apartment, where she’s meeting with her manager Corey. He has a lot of good news for her, but none of it really seems that relevant to us or this show. She’s asked to be on the cover of Upscale magazine, and later we’ll get to see the photo shoot, which is fun and fancy and pretty. Corey then also mentions a play that she was in recently, and says that she’s been asked to be in another. LaTavia then goes into another monologue about how she’s not ready to step back into the singing life, which, yeah, yeah, we get it by this point, but what is this about these plays? Can we get more details on that?

I’m understanding at this point that LaTavia is ready to step back into the spotlight in some way, but the road she wants to take clearly leads to more acting, not more singing. I’m happy for her, and I like her. But why is she on this show? A show about singers? Obviously, it’s just to get her name and face out there again, so she can be more successful in whatever endeavors she actually wants to do, but it seems a bit (or a lot) facetious. And I like to think that the majority of what happens on R&B Divas is actually genuine (I mean, as genuine as reality shows can be, but I think we all accept that), so this rubs me the wrong way. Maybe I’m wrong and she actually will open up her mouth and sing and find her inner peace on the concert stage again at some point this season, but I doubt it.

But in terms of ladies who really can sing and really do love it, Monifah and Syleena show up at Keke’s house to celebrate a very big musical accomplishment: a freaking GRAMMY NOMINATION, y’all! Syleena is also wearing a coat so big and fabulous that it could probably hide ten Grammys!

The R&B Divas album that was released for the first season of the show is up for Best R&B Album of the Year. And while Syleena and Mo are ready to hop on the plane to LA right now, Keke voices some confusion over the whole deal. Because she’s talked to Faith Evans, and she said that the only person nominated for a Grammy is Faith Evans.

Here’s the complication: the album includes all of them, but it’s under Faith’s name, and is produced by Faith, etc etc. But the divas are under the impression that it was a COMPILATION album, and so their involvement means they are all invited and they are all nominated. As Syleena says, when she worked with Kanye West on an album that was nominated for a Grammy, even though he was the primary artist, she got to walk the red carpet with him, she was invited and had a ticket.

But figuring this out is important, because this would be the first time either Keke or Monifah have been nominated, and being able to attach “Grammy Nominated Artist” to your name is huge. After Syleena and Mo convince Keke that they are all going to the Grammys, no matter what, Keke busts out the Martinelli’s–which she specifically got for Mo, since she knows she’s not drinking anymore–and they toast to themselves. Aw, I’m so glad Mo and Keke are friends again! Let’s also raise our own glasses to just how much these three women kick ass. While other cast members have come and gone over these three seasons, they remain the heart and soul of the show. If any one of them left I would be devastated.

Syleena later shows up at the studio where Angie Stone is recording some song with producers G. Flowers and Davion. Can I just pause for a second and say that R&B and hip-hop producers create the most amazing names for themselves? G. Flowers! I’m jealous that G. Flowers took his name first so I can never use it for myself! Anyway, I have to say that the song Angie is singing actually sounds pretty fly. Sometimes I find myself shaking my head at Angie Stone when she’s communicating with the other divas, but when it comes to music, the woman is still is a legend.

Syleena’s shown up to ask for some personal, musical advice. As we recall from a couple episodes ago, she has a big opportunity to present to record labels who really want her–but she needs the songs, first. And she has writer’s block. And writer’s block SUCKS. Angie commiserates, and offers her advice, and gently tells her that it’s OK to sing songs that other people have written, if she needs to. There’s a lot of things I like about this scene. I like that Syleena and Angie are just having some real talk about music and about writing. So much about Angie and the other divas on this show ends up in drama, but it’s nice to see her and Leena just supporting each other about the work for a minute.

I also like the conflict that Syleena is having about asking for outside help for her songs, and the authenticity she shows when she talks about writing her own music. As she says, “There’s nothing like when the words that you are speaking are the words that you are living.”

Of course, this nice and productive chat soon turns slightly sour when Angie invites Syleena to her party. And then asks her to sing at it. And Syleena gets the familiar “Oh, lawd” look. But Angie does a good job of not pressing it too hard, and they still seem okay.

A bunch more “Oh, lawd” eye rolls are present at our next scene, though, when all the divas show up for another “rehearsal” for the One Night Only concert, although so far these rehearsals, at least what we get to see of them, are comprised of a bunch of sitting around and chatting. First we learn that Keke can’t come to Angie’s birthday party, even though she really wants to, because her daddy’s getting married for the fifth time. I feel pretty confident that there could be an entire reality show just dedicated to Keke Wyatt’s family.

Then the Grammy nomination is brought up, and things get a little tense. Now, I’ve watched this scene a few times to figure out what actually happened. Because at first, it seems like Angie Stone is defending the divas’ rights, and calling out Faith for being weird. But then Monifah gets all upset. I think that Angie just stepped into her Mother Hen role a bit too much, as is so often her go-to, and started over-explaining a situation that wasn’t hers to explain. It’s Mo and Leena and Keke’s moment, and they can handle it themselves. But then Angie gets all ruffled that Mo has gotten so ruffled.

In any case, they move on, and offer up to all the divas the idea that Syleena had come up with during their celebratory meeting: having the One Night Only show in LA, during the week of the Grammys, when everyone from the industry will be there. Everyone seems really down with the idea, except for, of course, LaTavia, who just doesn’t want to be here at allllllll everrrrr and haha, I think Monifah and Syleena are starting to get fed up with it because they start rolling their eyes and giggling as LaTavia continues to explain that, look, you guys, she’s just not ready to sing.

Later, Mo starts filling in Terez about some of the drama at the rehearsal as they sit down to dinner together. But they’re soon interrupted by a knock on the door. Terez gets up knowingly to answer, and when she walks back in the room, Mo’s mouth drops all the way open in shock. And then she screams. Behind Terez walks in MOMS! Juanita, Terez’s mom, and Eleanor, Monifah’s mom, are both adorable and amazing and look just like their daughters OMG and everyone shares excited hugs.

As they all sit around the table, Juanita tells the story about the day Terez came out of the closet. She literally crawled into one in response. But it’s clear that Juanita has come a long way, because when Terez asks everyone to hold hands, and then asks the big question: will both of them not only give their blessing, but walk them down the aisle? Juanita immediately throws up her arms and screams, “Oh, HELL yeah.” I love you, Juanita!

Eleanor, however, is slightly more reticent. She starts by saying that growing up, her family instilled in her that women should marry men. And that she can’t lie and say that she’s 100% okay with everything because that’s “just how things are” these days. And we all start to clench our stomach and wonder if we have another Monifah’s-daughter situation. (Speaking of–I wonder if she’ll be at the wedding?) But then Eleanor says that she loves Terez, and the aura that she and Mo have, and that she just wants them both to be happy. It takes her a while to get there, but she says yes, she’ll walk her daughter down the aisle.

Monifah gets all verklempt. She wasn’t sure if her mom would say yes, understandably so after the little speech that her mom just made. But the important thing is that she DID say yes. “I’m SO HAPPY!” Monifah shouts, after getting over her tears. Man, I am going to cry SO HARD during this wedding.

And now it’s finally time for Angie Stone’s birthday party, and this ain’t just a regular birthday party, no, siree. This is an EVENT. There’s a red carpet! And photographers and tons of famous people singing R&B classics and I want to BE at this party! The only slight snag in all the fun is that LaTavia shows up late, which Angie feels disrespected by, and then when Angie gets up on stage and starts prodding up her divas to join her, LaTavia sits glumly at the table and says that she has laryngitis. To which Angie gives her some quality, “You serious, girl?” shade from the stage.

But while Sad Sally stays at the table, Syleena and Mo both give in to the birthday spirit and kill it on stage. And they are both lookin’ FINE, too. And while we didn’t see Meelah doing her own duet with Angie, either, she does get up on stage at the end, when the episode wraps up in my very favorite way: with a stage full of divas, singing and living and laughing together.

In the previews for next week, it looks like we get some more details about the Grammy nomination, and it doesn’t look good. What are your thoughts on it all?

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