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RachelWatch: The Supreme Court ushers in a plutocracy

Today: Congressman Barney Frank on the Court’s decision, Elizabeth Warren on get-tough financial regulations, and an update on the Jesus rifles.

Goliath Wins

If there’s one thing I keep hearing in the debates over health care reform and the financial meltdown, it’s “Gosh darn it to heck, couldn’t giant corporations have more of a voice in our national policy?”

Supreme Court to the rescue!

Thursday the Supremes decided that, in the interest of protecting their freedom of speech, corporations can pour unlimited amounts of money into our political system. The reasoning hearkens back to earlier decisions by the court that corporations should have the same rights of people.

Which works great, assuming you want to enfranchise immortal people who have immense wealth and no consciences. Could we get some ancient Greek and Norse gods in the mix while we’re at it?

The excellent Representative Barney Frank (D — My God, the same Massachusetts that just elected Scott Brown) joined Rachel to talk about our legislative options for chaining Fenris and to be remarkably open about his hasty words after Tuesday’s election.

“A Fight I’m Ready To Have”

Not a moment too soon, President Obama has decided to shove back at the banks for eating all the cashews out of the economy’s nut mix.

The President’s answer to “Nyah, nyah, nyah, too big to fail” is that it’s time, at last, to break out the carving knife.

The fantastic Elizabeth Warren dropped in with a surprising burst of optimism about taking control of the country’s finances back and locking in some protection for consumers.

In the middle of dropping some history on us, Warren described herself as a teacher, not a politician, which made me want to immediately form a giant amoral corporation so I can channel its profits toward getting her elected to everything ever.

But then I am widely known to have a nerd bias.

Moment of Meek

Transportation Security Administration nominee Erroll Southers has withdrawn himself from consideration because it turns out that being immensely qualified has nothing to do with it.

Rachel let Senator Joe “Newly Irrelevant” Lieberman (I – Who gives a rat?) tick off Southers’ qualifications, then moved on to look at how Senator Jim DeMint (R — South Carolina) politicked the nation out of a good thing and how the Democrats totally let him do it.

Rachel Spoke with Southers, who has a ton of expertise and some good forward thinking. Would have been nice to have him around.

Haiti SOS: Grants Not Loans

Hey, Some actual good news!

The IMF realized that instead of giving Haiti $100 million in juice loans, it might be a good idea to try to help rebuild Port-au-Prince without saddling the impoverished nation with hundreds of years of crippling debt again.

So they are. The $100 million is now a grant, not a loan. Wow.

I’d like to believe that this happened because 50 years ago the Haitians got together to build the Archangel Gabriel a bicycle, but I’ll need Pat Robertson to jump in and confirm.

Foul

Great burning flapjacks. I was really hoping the proposed whites-only All-American Basketball Alliance was a hoax, but apparently it isn’t.

Kent did a fine report on them, but I know we can do more. Anyone who actually joins this league deserves to be mocked (and dunked on) all day long.

Higher Powered Rifles

Rachel reported earlier in the week that Trijicon has been engraving Biblical citations on the rifle sights the U.S. military and others were using in Iraq and Afghanistan. Though somehow Matthew 5:39 didn’t make it into the mix.

Tonight Rachel noted that Trijicon has agreed to knock off the chapter-and-versing and send out “kits” to remove the citations. It’s still unclear how many years in hell the people who have to sand those off will rack up, but I’m sure that will be included in the instructions.

And, hey presto, we’re all grownups again!

Except for Fox and Friends.

Jesus.

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