RachelWatch: Champagne and Punditry

Today: It’s the first anniversary of The Rachel Maddow Show! Celebrate with Emily Litella and some great big piles of crazy.

The September Issue

Rachel started off her anniversary broadcast with a look at the current state of the health care debate, which has devolved from statements that the poor health insurance companies can’t possibly compete against the government to the new claims that the government isn’t allowed to get involved in keeping its citizens from dying because they can’t afford coverage.

The Democrats are of course helping the process by offering to drop the parts of health care reform that would have stopped that, so just go ahead and spend September with a refreshing swig of liquid nitrogen held up against your soft palate. It will make your brain hurt less.

Congressman Anthony Weiner (D – New York) dropped in to help get everyone charged up for President Obama’s speech tomorrow night.

Or to make you give up all hope that our government can get anything worthwhile done, ever. One of those.

Schoolhouse Crock

In case you were in one of our off-world colonies and missed the news over the past week or so, Obama gave a speech to our nation’s schoolchildren on Tuesday.

The President gave a bold and controversial speech in which he encouraged children to succeed by pledging their future incomes to the Communist cause, worshipping a giant statue of Baal, and setting personal goals and working hard to achieve them.

Anyway, the usual suspects lost their ever-lovin’ minds.

Ms. Information

Rachel reported that an order from Dick Cheney forced the London Metropolitan Police to prematurely arrest suspects in a terror ring lest their entire investigation get blown.

Rachel seemed to think that the Brits were ticked off about that, but surely they understood that arresting fewer suspects on less severe charges that were less likely to stick was all part of keeping the world safe.

No, not from terrorists, from Captain Grumpy. Unless he saw a few good arrests every week, there was no satisfying him and the Secret Service had to spend all day swatting his finger off the button.

Rachel also gave us an update on Samoa’s big switch from driving on the right to the left. It seems like the government planned ahead and the locals were remarkably good-natured about it.

Which is too bad, because it’s clearly a Muslim Socialist Nazi plot to make the Samoans destroy their nation by getting cash for their old righty cars and P.S. I heard their Prime Minister wasn’t even born there.

Fringe and Purge

I was glad that Rachel covered this next story. I had read bits of the weird detention camps theory elsewhere and honestly couldn’t figure out what the blogger in question was hinting at.

I don’t know if I should feel bad that I’m naïve or happy that my brain resisted the crazy for as long as it did.

The bullpuckey about the camps is apparently the last straw for at least one thinking conservative. Rachel welcomed blogger Jon Henke to talk about getting the rationals to take the Republican Party back.

They had a great conversation until Henke got shirty and Rachel had to pick him up by the scruff of his neck and put him in the corner.

Rachel Re: Czar Struck

Rachel gave us the perfect way to look at the current right-wing freakout over Obama’s czars.

(Spoiler: They’re not really czars. Other than that the objections are totally rational.)

And then Rachel finished off by graciously thanking her audience and her hardworking staff.

Congratulations to all on a great year.

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