Cue the fanfare. Here we are. Four designers going to Fashion Week! (OK, more than four, but let’s focus on these.) Two hours of Project Runway bliss! Everyone is grateful and all, “We are living our dreammmm!” Typing that just gave me a sudden idea: Project Runway: The Musical. Somebody make this happen!
But back to the final four, I have to make a correction: everyone is happy except for Christopher. Immediately after the critique from last week, while everyone else is celebrating, Christopher is an angry bird! He says, I won four challenges, bitches! This means I win! (Uh, no it doesn’t.) Why were you mean to me?! Next day in the workroom, Christopher’s anger has devolved into a sad mopey mess which is exhausting. Everyone else is taking the judges’ critiques to heart and plunging into making changes, making things perfect. But the criticism from the judges has clearly just sent Christopher’s head into a tailspin. Instead of focusing, he looks at his clothes and thinks, I don’t know, I guess I’ll make some new pieces? They have their hair consultations; he says, “Don’t like it, don’t like it, don’t like it.” The models come, he thinks, ugh, I don’t know, just find shit that fits. He snaps at his fellow designers and at Tim. Melissa calls a new piece of fabric she bought as “blood orange,” which seems like a fine description to me; Christopher is all, “Just call it red, you pretentious piece of shit!” Whoa there, buddy! It’s like his literal only reaction to criticism is to sit on the floor and moan, “But I just don’t know what to do!” I work with children. This is often how children react. You are a grown man! You are at Mercedes Benz Fashion Week! I normally like queens, but good God! Pull yourself together, man!
To the rest of the designers’ credit, Dmitry seems completely in control; Melissa is her typical slightly frazzled self but still, you know, acting like a likable human being; and dearest Fabio is in typical Fabio fashion, full of chills and gratitude and warm fuzzies and hugs!
During the makeup critique, Fabio also says, “If I could, I would wear that makeup myself every day.” You wear shirts as pants, Fabio. You can do whatever the hell you want, gurl!
At the end of the last day of work, Tim Gunn brings in a bottle of champagne. Dmitry says one of my favorite phrases: “Oh, alcohol!”Christopher says:
Speaking of Tim Gunn, he live tweeted the finale last night, proving that he really is the most earnest, caring human on the planet.
We end the evening with Christopher doing an unnecessarily nasty mockery of something totally normal that Melissa says. Melissa says, “Uh, OK,” and laughs awkwardly. I did just complain last week that these four were way too chummy with each other. Apparently not! Thanks for bringing back that catty vibe! But good job staying classy, most of you!
And now – it’s go time. This is one of my favorite parts of Project Runway: the quiet walk to Lincoln Center in the dark of night. No matter how whiney or dramatic or mean any contestant has ever been, every single one always gasps in awe and shivers in a bundle of nerves when they arrive inside and see the runway, the empty seats which will soon be filled. Watching others experience their own personal magic always feels like an honor.
The scene once people actually start to fill in and Shit Gets Real is mayhem per usual. Dmitry’s models are doing some weird tinfoil hair thing that is taking a million years; Christopher literally rips the bottom off his fancy dress at the last minute; Melissa has dressed one of her models in a dress that literally forces her to take baby steps like Bill Murray in What About Bob.
But, as always, the show must go on, and we’re introduced to our lovely judges on the runway.
Our guest judge is Jennifer Hudson. (Love!) Michael Kors is prepared with his signature Fashion Week sunglasses which seem like they would be a hindrance to examining designs but what do I know. Heidi is looking dazzling because she always looks dazzling.
Christopher is first to show, and he manages to put aside his angst and seems cheery on the runway, and then dedicates his collection to his family and his boyfriend. His boyfriend in the audience is once again SO CUTE and smiling SO BIG that his existence alone makes me feel slightly softer about Christopher this episode. A little.
But we’re here for the clothes. Here’s a brief summary of my thoughts on each designer’s collection. My screen shots aren’t the clearest because I’m watching this on an airport wifi connection right now, so I recommend looking at further images on Project Runway‘s website!
There were some pieces in Christopher’s collection that I really liked – the cut of that first skirt was great, and that sweeping dress at the end was lovely. And again, I do really love that print from his mom’s spine. But overall, it doesn’t seem entirely cohesive – the dress, while wonderful, sort of came out of nowhere. And there wasn’t a lot of “wow” in general. I don’t think Christopher will be in the running.
When Melissa’s collection walks out, it’s clear how much more polished it is as a whole. Every piece seems sleek and cool, and I absolutely love the models’ hair! And that leather dress that she whipped up at the last moment really was a knockout. (Blood Orange v. Red: Never Forget.) And it’s very cohesive. But as for innovation and really pushing the fashion envelope? I’m not sure if it’s there. But they are extremely marketable; a very fashionable, badass woman of today would undoubtedly love every piece. And lately the judges have seemed to wander on the real purpose of Project Runway: is it for fashion for art’s sake, or for fashion that’s sellable? (See: The Gretchen Jones Disaster.)
Then Dmitry! I am impressed with Dmitry from the start. It has the polished factor of Melissa’s, but a lot of it is also just real weird! Fringe! Kooky cut outs! It’s modern and different and interesting. And just so…Dmitry. The two dresses we hadn’t previously seen were fantastic, both the short one and the last one. When the last one walked out, I believe I actually had my own first personal “wow” moment of the entire season. (Which is perhaps sad.) My only critique would be that the hair that took forever is the worst. I hate the ponytails. Hate! But, the clothes, top notch.
And last but certainly not least, we have Fabio. From the background music to the color scheme to the silhouettes, most certainly, everything about Fabio’s collection is Different. And he really did take the judges’ recommendations to heart, and in addition to all his flowy balloon outfits he has quite a few sleek and sophisticated pieces as well. I also love those blue striped hot pants that came out first! I love Fabio as both a person and an artist, and I also love how absolutely unique his collection was. But maybe it’s just the fact that it’s 4:30 AM and I’ve spent the last six hours in an airport and am sleep-deprived, but after a few pieces all those pastel colors started to blend together and I felt like a pale flowing fabric zombie. But still, strangely pretty in an almost subdued, yet effective, way.
As always, the audience is abuzz with celebrities, Project Runway related and Real World celebrities combined, along with everyone else from this season. I caught just a second of Alicia, and also these two favorite personalities of mine from way back when.
But time to head back to the Project Runway set and get personal. The judges have kind words for everyone. Also, while I’ve already called attention to Heidi, Nina Garcia is looking quite the sly fox herself. Who am I kidding, Nina Garcia is always a fox!
My favorite critique has to be from Jennifer Hudson to Dmitry about his collection. She says, “It’s rich, honey. It’s everything.” Anyone calling Dmitry “honey”: the best, particularly when it’s Jennifer Hudson.
On our TV screens, it seems the judges then converse amongst themselves rather quickly, but Tim Gunn’s tweet fest also let us know that the actual discussion went on for multiple hours. It becomes apparent that the real competition is between Fabio and Dmitry. Dmitry’s collection seems perfect for today, and is executed so wonderfully. Fabio though seems to have the most new vision for the future – the clothes that they didn’t even know they would like, or want, but they did.
When Christopher and Melissa are eliminated, I do shed a little tear as they hug their families in the waiting rooms, particularly when Melissa hugs mommy. All the parents are so proud and sad for them and so overcome!
And then it’s the showdown: Fabio versus Dmitry. After the way they had been talking, I had felt sure they would go with Fabio. But no! It’s the Belarusan who reigns supreme!
Fabio and Dmitry. My favorite man hug EVER.
I love Dmitry, and I did love his collection best. So, yay! It is extremely well deserved, at least in my opinion. But Fabio’s heartbreak is hard to take because he is just so goddamn sincere and kind while he is so sad and I have to admit the judges’ discussion swayed me a bit. He knew he had something special, and it sounds like he really needed the money, to help both himself and his mom. People getting so close to solving all their financial troubles and then losing it breaks my heart in two, and I think I can speak for anyone who has ever been poor.
But Dmitry also has a good story, as we’ve heard multiple times: leaving his home country at 18 with a single bag, and working towards this vision with a seemingly singular focus. And indeed, while everyone else has families waiting for them to hug and celebrate, Dmitry just has a small gaggle of blonde girls! I mean, which he still seems excited about, but, you know! I want to see Dmitry get a hug from his mommy! But anyway, so yeah, Dmitry is the American dream.
But take care, Fabio – it’s clear that so many people were both surprised by and enchanted with your collection. I don’t think you should worry about those bills you have to pay too much. People are going to want you. Take heed that Project Runway runner-ups have often proved to be more successful than winners.
Phew! And now we’re left with that strange empty feeling of it all being suddenly over, having to wait another number of months before we all get to pretend that any of us know what the hell fashion is about once again.
What were your thoughts on the collections? On the winner (and losers)? On the season?
