“Project Runway” recap: It took a boy in a dress

Our guest judge this week, by the way, is Alice Temperley, a British designer who’s wearing this flow-y flowery dress which accentuates her lovely face and wavy hair and who basically I just keep imagining as Florence Welch inside my head. 

The bottom three are revealed as Ven, Sonjia, and Nathan. During the critique of Nathan’s shiny blue dress, Heidi describes it as looking very “hoochie mama.” Alice Temperley is then part of the most hilarious exchange of the episode:

Heidi Klum: “A hoochie mama.”

Alice Temperley: “A what?”

Michael Kors, giggling a little: “Hoochie mama.”

Alice Temperley: “What does that mean?”

Michael Kors: “She–a tart.”

Alice Temperley: “Oh, yeah. Got lots of those in England.”

Perhaps you have to hear her say it herself in her perfectly British dismissive voice, but this made me laugh out loud for at least three minutes. Oh, Alice Temperley. Let’s see more of you sometime.

Back to Nathan, though. While his outfit is somewhat unfortunate, it’s also close to what his client wanted. She’s a pop/hip-hop singer who wants something sexy for the stage. So while I agree with what the judges say, it’s tough because she did sort of want hoochie mama.

Oh, and that little pink dress Alicia was making? Didn’t turn out too bad:

Way to make something you never normally make and make your client happy, Alicia. That’s what you need to make it on Project Runway. Once again, it lands her safely in the middle.

The top three end up being Dmitry, Fabio, and Gunnar, and all of the comments from the judges are especially positive this week. Fabio ends up being the winner, as he completely deserves. He took our dykey lady who hates girly things and made her this completely fabulous gray dress, which she loved.

I also love, love, love this dress. I want this dress! Although it’s hard to tell as the black blends in with the background, Fabio is also rocking a dress himself, and Michael Kors makes the amazing quip, “It took a boy in a dress to get you into a dress.” Hugs for everyone in this trio right now, including the nerdy boy who brought Ko-Rely into our lives.

So yay for the happy times! But now back to the sad, dark, dreary times. The hideous Ven times.  He doesn’t trash his model on the runway as much as he did to her face previously, but he did immediately make excuses about having to work with a “real woman.” To which Heidi replies, “I find it so amazing every time you guys say, ‘It’s the first time I’ve worked with a real woman.’ Like, who is not real?” Word, Heidi. Word.

Her friend who brought her to this whole thing also becomes teary on the runway, explaining that all she wanted was something good for her. She works full-time, has four kids, has to commute four hours a day every day, and never gets any time for herself. None of which Ven, of course, bothered to find out, since all he cared about was her size. 

I do have to say that with these challenges, even when the designers don’t know how to deal with their clients, the judges always do. They know how to critique the designs without trashing the models themselves, and Heidi apologizes to Ven’s model, placing all the blame on him, where it rightly deserves to be. Not only was he appallingly rude to her, he didn’t listen to her enough to even make what she wanted. 

In the end, it’s Nathan’s hoochie mama dress which was too much for the judges, and he has to go. This is sad, since Nathan seems like a genuinely good human being, in addition to making his client so much happier than Ven’s. As Tim Gunn says, in the way that Tim Gunn always says these things so well, we’re losing someone with “profound qualities of character.”

The judges threaten, however, that someone else could be eliminated as well, as they like to do sometimes to scare people.

My girl Sonjia is safe, thank the heavens. And it turns out Ven is, too. They clearly just wanted to have him on stage last so they could give him a little talking to, although it’s really a relatively mild talking to. When he gets back to the other room with the rest of the designers, they ask him what happened. He doesn’t really answer, but says that he doesn’t think he should have been the last one on stage, because there were some other “weak looks.”

Good plan, Ven! One by one, all the other designers have already said throughout this episode that they have lost complete respect for you. Even sweet Alicia, who visibly rolls her eyes and shakes her head in wonderment at this last comment from you. Way to continue to alienate your peers even further by insulting them and refusing to admit you ever did anything wrong! Bravo, sir.

In the previews for the next show, it appears that many of the ladies just happen to be having a very bad, no good day with this next challenge, and there are many, many tears. As if to seal the deal on this whole episode with Ven, we get to hear him say in reaction to this coincidental meltdown by females in this preview: “Men are usually stronger designers.” Ha! Ha! Shut up!

I could say even more about all the feelings I have about “real women” and the self-image issues this episode brought up in me, but I’ve already said too much. What did you think? 

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