“Pretty Little Liars” recap 3.24: A Psycho By Any Other Name

All of the newspapers in all of the land are still piled high on the Cavenaugh’s front porch, but somebody is finally home, and that somebody is Jenna Marshall, and even just the peek we get of her through the curtains is more than my starved heart can handle. She hisses into the phone that things were supposed to be taken care of, and now there’s all these loose ends, and Jenna needs to see this person today, OK, with her actual working eyeballs. Someone creeps up to the front door and texts a meet-up location, and Jenna rushes to the door to scowl outside. But no one is there.

Byron storms into his house of an afternoon, acting like a little bitch. Apparently Rosewood High has all these employee ethics all of a sudden.Yyou can’t date students or kidnap students and lock them in the basement or host formal dance events due to the fact that someone’s always getting clubbed over the head in the chemistry classroom or murdered in the courtyard. And Ezra Fitz-Fitzgerald does not meet those standard. Aria tells Bryon to chill out, that Ezra didn’t get the job, and Byron tells Aria to shut her lying mouth, because yes he did.

Baby-sitter’s Club Interview. Have Hanna and Ezra ever had a scene together before? I don’t think they have. It’s marvelous, really, that they’ve waited so long to meet one-on-one, because we know them both so well but they don’t know each other at all and Ezra’s genuine befuddlement in the presence of Hanna’s glory is a wonder to behold. He asks if she has a resume and she goes, “What for? Aren’t all boys into fast cars and fast women?” Ezra is like, “Well, Malcolm is mostly into, like, trains.” And Hanna legitimately makes a “toot-toot” train noise and says, “All aboard the Hanna Express!” Ezra’s eyes are so wide and uncomfortable. He can’t even look at Hanna.

JennaBot drives to a picnic table in a park very similar to the picnic table she drove to in a park in the season two finale where she gave a mysterious person a mysterious package that I have always thought was Peter Hastings’ gun, but I maybe just made that up the way Spencer made up Peter Hastings. Jenna sits down and stares lovingly into the eyes of a Person, happy to see the Person but sad because her eyeballs are going bad again and so seeing the Person is a luxury she will not have much longer. She tells the Person that the Liars will be meeting together this Friday and that the Person knows what the Person must do.

She pauses and looks up at the sky because a plane is flying overhead, which is so amazing in so many ways because it means that [spoiler alert!] Red Coat just is just flying around Rosewood in circles for two days before she docks her personal aircraft at the Thornhill landing strip. How does she know everything? How is she everywhere? Well, here’s part of the answer at least: Her prefered mode of transportation is a literal spy plane.

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